Kugwa M'chikondi Ndi Mwamuna Wanu Zinandipweteka Nanenso

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Wolemba Alex Alexander wa YourTango.com

Ine ndine wa wokondedwa wanga ndipo wokondedwa wanga ndi wanga. Timakhala moyang'anizana pa chakudya chamadzulo cha Greasy Spoon, tikufika patebulo kuti tigwirane manja, ndikugwirana zala zazikulu ndi kukoma kwa wosewera vayolini. Tiyenera kukhala okhudza, okhudza nthawi zonse. Timachita nthabwala ndi kuseka, timalankhula, timakhala mopembedzera. Ndikudziwa inchi iliyonse ya nkhope yake ndipo amadziwa inchesi yanga iliyonse. Ndimayitanitsa chakudya chake (Belgium imodzi imasungunuka mbali yofewa, mbale yankhumba) ndipo amalamula zanga (kagawo kakang'ono, kopanda batala, mbale ya zipatso, mbali ya nyama yankhumba yowonjezerapo). Timakhala tonse pamodzi mchikondi chathu ndikusangalala pakamphindi kalikonse.

Galimoto imatuluka panja ndikumupangitsa kuti ayang'ane mwachangu. Kuyang'ana kumangokhala kwakutali kwambiri. Banja lomwe lili mgalimoto limalowa mkati ndipo amatsatira mayendedwe awo onse. Amakhala matumba awiri kumbuyo kwathu. Amayang'ana kwakanthawi, kenako ndikuchotsa manja ake patebulo. Divot mu chala chake chaching'ono chimayatsa, ndikundikumbutsa za kuzunzidwa komwe ndimakonda kubisala tikakhala limodzi. Akugwedezeka m'thumba mwake, mofulumira ndi mantha, ndipo akubweza bande lake laukwati la platinamu pa chala chake. Mtima wanga wagundika. Timatenga bilu ndikulipira chakudya chathu chomwe sichinamalizidwe. Panja, akupepesa. Sindinena kalikonse ndikuthamangira kunyumba ndekha ndimisozi.

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Mungaganize kuti nditakhala pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna wokwatiwa zaka zitatu, ndazolowera.

Koma imangoluma monga momwe timathamangira kwa wachibale wake ndipo ndimayenera "kubisala kuseri kwa malalanje" m'sitolo. Kunena zowona, izi sizinali zochitika kawirikawiri. Mwinamwake izo zinapangitsa izo kuipiraipira? Sindidzadziwa motsimikiza. Ndikuganiza kuti cholakwacho ndi changa. Ndikadakhala kuti sindinalole kuti zinthu ziziyenda bwino, sindimamva kupweteka komwe kumandikhudza pomwe ndimafunikira kubisa ubale wathu kapena kumva nsanje akamapita kunyumba kwa mkazi wake, monga amachitira nthawi zonse.

Ndiye ndichifukwa chiyani ndidachita? Nchifukwa chiyani aliyense amachita izi? Kumayambiriro kwa zonsezi, zofunikira pamkhalidwewo zidasambira mosangalala m'mutu mwanga. Tangolingalirani ufulu! Tangoganizani kusakhalapo kwa udindo wodzipereka! Ndinali mkazi wotetezeka, wodzidalira ndipo sindinkafuna kusokoneza moyo wanga chifukwa cha ubale komanso chilichonse chomwe chimabwera. Mofanana ndi akazi ambiri amakono, ndinkaona kuti ndimangofunika mwamuna pa chinthu chimodzi, ndipo moyo wokwatirana sunali zimenezo. Ndiye ndinaganiza, ndani kuposa mwamuna wokwatira? Komanso, mwamuna wokwatira wokhala ndi ana! Anali ndi udindo wake ndi mkazi wake komanso banja. Sipakanakhala zovuta m'mawa-pambuyo pake, palibe mafoni okhazikika kapena mameseji. Ndikhoza kukhala ndi malo onse omwe ndimafuna ndipo sindimamva zodandaula kuchokera kumapeto kwake. Zingakhale zosavuta komanso zopanda nkhawa.

Koma zomwe zidayamba ngati ubale wosavuta, wopanda zingwe (kapena chinyengo cha umodzi) zidasintha kukhala zina zambiri. Simungathe kukhala ndi keke yanu ndikudyanso. Mwina kunali kugwedezeka kwa magetsi komwe tonse tinamva pamene tinakumana koyamba ndi kugwirana chanza kapena mwina kunali kumvetsetsa kwathu mavuto a wina. Mulimonsemo, tinayamba kudalirana. Tidali chizolowezi cha wina ndi mnzake pamene m'modzi wa ife amafuna thandizo. Ndipo ubwenzi wopanda pake-ndi-maubwino unasinthidwa kukhala ubale wachikondi, wachikondi. Nditha kuwona kuti aurora akuvina m'maso mwake atandiona, ndipo amatha kuwona kuphulika kwanga. Tinkadziwana mkati ndi kunja, miyoyo yathu inali yolumikizana kwambiri kotero kuti zinali zovuta kuzilekanitsa.

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Koma sindinkawerengera zovuta za ubale wamtunduwu.

Ndimaganiza kuti zonse zatha. Sindinayembekezere kukula kuti ndizimufuna. Sindinayembekezere kuti adzamusowa tikakhala kuti sitili limodzi, sindinkayembekezera kuti angakonde ana ake moti aziona ngati achibale, ndipo sindinkayembekezera kuti angayambe kukondana. Kapena kuti andikonde. Zomwe ndimaganiza kuti zitha kukhala zosavuta zidatha kukhala zopsinjika. Tinayenera kubisala. Nthawi yathu yocheza nthawi zonse inali kufupikitsidwa kuti mkazi wake asadziwe. Ndinali wansanje komanso wokwiya komanso wamisala mchikondi, ndipo nthawi zina, zimandipweteka ndimalephera kupirira. Ndimadana kukhala wachiwiri pamzere, komabe ndinali. Amandiuza nkhani zazikulu za momwe tidzakhalire limodzi nthawi zonse tsiku lina. Amamusiya ndikukhala ndi ine. Gawo laling'ono la ine linamukhulupirira, koma ena onse a ine ankadziwa bwino. Komabe ndinakhalabe. Tidali ndi kulumikizana kwakukulu kotero kuti ndidatsimikiza kuti kukhala opanda iye kungakhale koipa kwambiri kuposa kupirira zowawa zogawana mamuna wanga. Mofanana ndi china chilichonse m’moyo wanga, ubwenzi wathu unakhazikika m’mawu anyimbo amene ndinaona kuti akufotokoza mkhalidwe wathu.

Sugarland, "Khalani": Ndi zowawa kwambiri kupirira / kukonda mwamuna yemwe muyenera kugawana nawo. Owononga, "Siyani Zidutswa": Mukuti simukufuna kundipweteka, simukufuna kuwona misozi yanga / nanga bwanji mukuyimirabe pano mukungondiwona ndikumira ... Simukuganiza kwanu / mukundipha komanso mukuwononga nthawi. Nickel Creek, "Ndiyenera Kudziwa Bwino": Chikondi chanu chimatanthauza mavuto kuyambira tsiku lomwe tidakumana / mudapambana, ndidataya ndalama zonse. Zac Brown Band, "Colder Weather": Ndipo amadabwa ngati chikondi chake ndi cholimba mpaka kumupangitsa kukhala / Amayankhidwa ndi magetsi a mchira / Kuwala kudzera pazenera.

Kuwamvetsera kunandipangitsa kumva bwino. Zinanditsimikizira kuti munthu wina anakumana ndi zomwe ndinachita, kuti sindinali ndekha m'mazunzo anga. Koma ngakhale kudzera mu nyimbo, ndimatha kumva kuti zinthu zikuyamba kuwonongeka. Ndinayamba kuganizira kwambiri za moyo wake ndi iye. Kodi iwo ankatani? Amapita kuti? Kodi anali kusangalala naye kusiyana ndi ine? Kodi chinali chiyani chachikulu pa iye mulimonse? Chikondi chathu kwa wina ndi mzake chinakhalabe cholimba, koma ubalewo unatha. Ndinkadziwa zomwe ndimayenera kuchita, ngakhale ndimayesetsa kuzinyalanyaza.

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Madzulo a Marichi ofunda mopanda nyengo, ndinathetsa.

Kutentha kunachoka mlengalenga ndipo Kasupe yemwe akubwera adandidzaza ndi mphamvu komanso chilimbikitso chochita chinthu chovuta kwambiri chomwe ndimadziwa kuti ndiyenera kuchita. Misozi yanga idagwa mwachangu ngati bingu loyamba la chaka.

"Mukuti chiyani?" anandifunsa. "Ndikuganiza kuti ndasiyana nanu," ndidatero.

"Mwinamwake muyenera kulingalira za izo mochuluka," iye anakakamiza. Ndinamuuza kuti, "Sindingathe kunena izi, zatha."

Ndipo zinali zomwezo. Panalibe kudzitukumula komanso zochitika. Choonadi chopanda pake. Tinalankhula mosamalitsa kwa masiku angapo otsatira ndipo pamapeto pake zidazimiririka popanda kulumikizana. Chete, dziko langa linali kutha. Ndinataya chikondi, pa moyo. Ndinakhala pabedi tsiku lonse osadya. Anzanga ndi achibale anga anakakamira. Iwo samadziwa zomwe zinali kuchitika; Chomwe amangodziwa chinali vuto langa looneka ngati losafunikira. Ndinkayenda mobwerezabwereza kukagwira ntchito pokambirana za upangiri, kukumbatira komanso kuyesa kundikakamiza kudya. Pamapeto pake, ndinali wosweka. Chokhacho choyipa kuposa kunyamula cholemacho chokha ndikunyamula nokha.

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Kenako adayitana.

Amafuna kuti ndidziwe kuti akazi awo amadziwa zonse. Kuti amandikonda ndipo sangathe kugwira ntchito popanda ine. Koma sanali wokonzeka. Kodi ndingadikire, chonde. Anandifuna. Adzakhala nane pamene ana ake anayambanso sukulu. Adzakhala ndi ine mu Seputembala. Inde, inde ndikadikirira. Iye anali wokondedwa wanga.

Miyezi ingapo yotsatira inali mphepo yamkuntho yachisangalalo ndi kukayikira. Tinali limodzi pafupifupi tsiku lililonse, monga momwe ubale wobisika umakulolani kuti mukhale. Analankhula za maloto anthawi yayitali, za nyumba yathu yamtsogolo ndi maulendo omwe tikanapite ndikukhala ndi ana pamapeto pake. Mtima wanga unalilakalaka ndipo ndinkafuna kumukhulupirira. Ubongo wanga unkadziwa bwino. Ndinakhala pafupi, ndikumamatira ku chiyembekezo, ndikumamuyang'ana pomwe amagula mipando yatsopano ndi mkazi wake. Ali ndi galimoto yatsopano. Analemba ntchito yokonza malo ndikuyamba kukonza nyumba yake. Ndinakhala Lolemba mpaka Lachisanu, bwenzi la 9 mpaka 5. Kwa maora makumi anayi pa sabata pomwe mkazi wake anali kugwira ntchito, anali wanga. Amandikonda ndipo amandipembedza ndipo amalankhula zamtsogolo mwathu. Koma September anafika ndipo September anadutsa. Dzuwa ndi mwezi zidatuluka ndikugwa. Ndipo ndinali ndekha.

Anandiuza kuti tidzakhala limodzi mu Seputembala. Chifukwa chake woyamba wa Seputembala, ndimadikirira. Ndimapita kumalo odyera a Greasy Spoon ndipo ndimamudikirira. Kwa chikondi changa. Ndipo zaka zikamapita, chiyembekezo changa sichikuchepa. Imakhala yolimba. Mwina tsiku lina, atatha nthawi yonse yomwe adzatayike, adzandipeza ndipo Seputembala wanga adzabwera.

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Nkhaniyi idawoneka ngati Ndine Mkazi Winayo Ndipo Kukonda Mwamuna Wanu Zimandipweteka, Nazonso pa YourTango.com

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