Momwe Mungazindikire ndi Kupeza Zolemba Kudzipereka

Zamkati

• Choyamba, zinthu zochepa zofunika kukumbukira
• Zizindikiro mwa iwe wekha
• Simukufuna kukhala pachibwenzi mozama
• Simukuganiza za tsogolo laubwenzi
• Mumakhala nthawi yambiri mukufunsa za chibwenzi
• Simukufuna kupanga mapulani
• Simukumva kutengeka mtima
• Mumakhala osasangalala kapena ogwidwa mnzanu akawonetsa zizindikiro zachuma
• Zizindikiro mwa mnzanu
• Sakuwoneka kuti ali ndiubwenzi kapena inu
• Safuna kulankhula za tsogolo laubwenzi
• Amakhala ovuta kutsegula kapena kugawana malingaliro ozama
• Amakambirana zamtsogolo, koma zolinga zawo sizikukukhudzani
• Samayankha mauthenga anu, mafoni, kapena zolemba kwa masiku
• Kuthana ndi mantha odzipereka
• Mankhwala payekha
• Maanja othandizira
• Lankhulani za izi
• Yesetsani kudzipereka
• Khalani ndi chizolowezi
• Funani mnzanu amene amalemekeza zosowa zanu
• Mfundo yofunika

Si zachilendo kwa anthu omwe amapewa maubwenzi a nthawi yayitali kumva kuti ali ndi nkhani zodzipereka kapena kuwopa kudzipereka. Anthu ambiri amagwiritsa ntchito mawuwa mopepuka, koma kwenikweni, kudzipereka (ndikuwopa) nthawi zambiri kumakhala kovuta.

Kudzipereka ndi nthawi yayitali, koma nthawi zambiri zimafika podzipereka kwa chinthu kwa nthawi yayitali, kaya ndi ntchito, cholinga, mzinda, kapena ubale.

Lingaliro lazinthu zodzipereka, komabe, limakonda kumabwera nthawi zambiri pankhani yakukondana.

Mukuganiza kuti inu kapena mnzanu mungaope kudzipereka? Nazi zinthu zofunika kuziyang'anira:

Choyamba, zinthu zochepa zofunika kukumbukira

Intaneti ili ndi mafunso okwanira, mindandanda yamabendera ofiira, ndi zina zotero. Izi ndizosangalatsa - ndipo zitha kukuthandizaninso kuzindikira zina za inu kapena ubale wanu.

Koma kumbukirani kuti vuto lanu lapaderadera ndilakuti: wapadera.

Mndandandanda sungazindikire kapena kulingalira zonse zomwe zikuchitika mu ubale wanu, choncho tengani (kuphatikiza iyi) ndi njere yamchere.

Ngati inu chitani zindikirani zina mwa izi mwa inu kapena mnzanu, sizitanthauza kuti ubale wanu watha.

Kuphatikiza apo, nkhani zodzipereka sizimabwera nthawi zonse chifukwa cha mantha.

Kuleredwa kwa winawake, mbiri yabanja, kapena zina zingakhudze momwe munthu amachitira ndi chibwenzi chodzipereka. Izi zitha kupangitsa kuti kukhale kovuta kudziwa kusiyana pakati pa munthu yemwe sakufuna kwenikweni kuchita ndi amene akuchita ndi zovuta zina.

Pomaliza, kumbukirani kuti kudzipereka sikofanana ndi chikondi. Ndizotheka kwathunthu kukonda wokondedwa wanu ndikukhalabe ndi vuto lodzipereka.

Zizindikiro mwa iwe wekha

Sizovuta nthawi zonse kuzindikira pomwe kachitidwe ka maubale osakhalitsa kakuyimira mwayi wazibwenzi zoyipa kapena zikawonetsa china chake chofunikira kwambiri.

Nazi zina mwazizindikiro zomwe zitha kumveketsa izi:

Simukufuna kukhala pachibwenzi mozama

Kufuna kukhala ndi chibwenzi chamwambo komanso kupewa zibwenzi sizitanthauza kuti mukuopa kudzipereka. Mutha kukhala ndi chifukwa chimodzi cha izi, kapena mwina mungakhale ndi zingapo.

Koma ngati nthawi zonse mumamva kufunika kothetsa zinthu pamene maubwenzi ayamba kuyenda modutsa, ngakhale mumakonda munthu amene mukumuwonayo, mutha kukhala ndi mantha osadzipereka.

Simukuganiza za tsogolo laubwenzi

Nthawi ina muubwenzi, anthu ambiri amakhala kwakanthawi kochepa kuganizira ngati munthu amene ali pachibwenzi naye angapange masewera abwino kwanthawi yayitali.

Ngati sangathe kuwona zamtsogolo, atha kuthetsa chibwenzicho ndikupitiliza. Koma anthu ena saganizira zamtsogolo konse - ndipo safuna kutero.

Palibe cholakwika ndikufuna kusangalala ndi zomwe muli nazo tsopano ndi mnzanu. Koma kulephera koona kapena kusafuna kuganiza za gawo lotsatira laubwenzi kungatanthauze kuopa kudzipereka, makamaka ngati ili ndi machitidwe muubwenzi wanu.

Mumakhala nthawi yambiri mukufunsa za chibwenzi

Mwina inu chitani Ganizirani zamtsogolo za ubale wanu. Mumakondana kwambiri ndi mnzanu, mumakhala olumikizidwa komanso mumakonda, ndipo mumasangalala kucheza limodzi. Ngakhale zili choncho, simungathe kudzifunsa nokha zinthu monga:

• “Kodi amandikondadi?”
• “Zitachitika ndi chiyani kenako?”
• “Kodi ndakonzekera izi?”
• "Kodi ndikufuna kuti izi zigwire ntchito?"

Ndizachilendo kudzifunsa mafunso ngati awa nthawi ndi nthawi, makamaka ngati mumaganiziradi za munthu wina ndipo simukufuna kumutaya.

Kufunsa ubale nthawi zonse, komabe, mpaka pomwe ungasokoneze ubalewo kapena kumakupweteketsani mtima, zitha kuwonetsa kudzipereka.

Simukufuna kupanga mapulani

Kodi mumapewa kukonzekera tsiku Lachisanu usiku mpaka Lachisanu m'mawa?

Kodi mumapereka mayankho osamveka ngati, "Mwina! Ndikudziwitsa "kapena" Ndiroleni ndikuwone momwe sabata likuyendera "pamene munthu amene muli naye pachibwenzi ayesa kukonzekera?

Kodi kuganizira mapulani omwe mwapanga kale amakupanikizani mpaka pamapeto pake mumafuna kuwaletsa?

Kusafuna kupanga mapulani nthawi zina kumawonetsa kuti mulibe chidwi kwenikweni ndi munthu amene muli naye pachibwenzi, makamaka ngati mukukakamira kuthekera kwamalingaliro abwinoko.

Koma pamene iwe chitani monga munthu ameneyo ndikusangalala kucheza nawo, komabe mumakhala ndi nkhawa, vuto lingakhale kudzipereka.

Simukumva kutengeka mtima

Kuyang'ana kudzipereka muubwenzi wachikondi kumawonetsa kuti kudzipereka kumatha kukhala yankho pakumva nkhawa kapena mantha otaya bwenzi.

Ngati mumadzimva otetezeka ndikufuna kuti chibwenzicho chipitirire, mumakhala ndi mwayi wogwira ntchito yofunikira kuti mupitilize.

Khama ili likuwonetsa kudzipereka kwanu ndipo lingathandize kuthana ndi nkhawa zamtsogolo zaubwenzi, makamaka ngati mnzanuyo akuwonetsa chidwi chofananira pakuphatikizidwa kwanthawi yayitali.

Koma ngati simukumva kukondana ndi wokondedwa wanu, mwina simungasamale kapena kuganiza kwambiri zakutaya izi. Zachidziwikire, muli ndi nthawi yopambana limodzi, koma mumanyalanyaza lingaliro loti sindidzawaonanso. Mukukhutitsidwa kwambiri ndikupitiliza kuchita zomwe mukufuna.

Nthawi zina, kusalumikizana mwamalingaliro kumangotanthauza kuti munthu amene muli naye pachibwenzi sakhala machesi abwino kwambiri kwa inu. Komabe, ngati mukudziwa kuti mukufuna chibwenzi ndipo simukumva kuti muli ndi chidwi ndi anzanu, ganizirani ngati mantha akudzipereka angakulepheretseni.

Mumakhala osasangalala kapena ogwidwa mnzanu akawonetsa zizindikiro zachuma

Izi zimatha kubwera osamvetsetsa.

Mwachitsanzo, mnzanu akamati "Ndimakukondani" koyamba, mutha kukhala osangalala. Koma kenako, mukaganiza, mumayamba kuda nkhawa ndikudzifunsa kuti izi zikutanthauza chiyani kapena zomwe zidzachitike pambuyo pake.

Mwinanso mungakhale ndi chidwi chofuna kuthawa, kaya mukufunadi kuthetsa chibwenzicho kapena ayi.

Zizindikiro mwa mnzanu

Mukakhala okonzeka kukhala pachibwenzi koma mnzanu akuwoneka wokhutira ndi zinthu zomwe sizikhala chimodzimodzi, mutha kuyamba kudzifunsa ngati akufuna zomwezo zomwe mumafuna.

Zizindikiro zotsatirazi zitha kutanthauza kuti muli pachibwenzi ndi munthu amene amachita mantha. Koma ndizovuta kudziwa ngati izi zilidi zizindikilo za kudzipereka pokhapokha mutalankhula nawo pazifukwa zomwe akuchita.

Ngati mukuda nkhawa ndi kudzipereka kwa mnzanu, kukambirana momasuka, moona mtima ndichinthu choyamba choyenera.

Pakadali pano, nazi zina mwa zizindikiro zakudzipereka kwa mnzanu:

Sakuwoneka kuti ali ndiubwenzi kapena inu

Izi zitha kuwonekera m'njira zambiri. Amatha kudziwa anzanu onse koma osakuwuzani aliyense wa iwo. Mwina amalankhula nkhani zabwino koma amawoneka kuti alibe chidwi chofotokoza momwe akumvera kapena moyo watsiku ndi tsiku (kapena wanu).

Muthanso kuzindikira kusowa chidwi pakupanga mapulani omwe sali mtsogolo muno.

Chidwi ichi sichimadziwika nthawi zonse. Mwachitsanzo, atha kumveka achisangalalo mukaganiza zakuyenda ulendo kapena tchuthi koma muli ndi chowiringula kapena mukakonza zokangana mukamayesetsa kuchepetsa tsiku.

Ndizotheka kuti mnzanuyo akufuna kuti azikhala nanu nthawi imeneyo. Atha kungolimbana ndikudzipereka komwe akukhudzidwa.

Safuna kulankhula za tsogolo laubwenzi

Ngati mwakhala mukuwona munthu amene mumamukonda kwa miyezi ingapo, mutha kuyamba kuganizira za kuthekera kwa chibwenzi chomwe chikukula. Kupatula apo, ndinu ogwirizana, mumasangalala kukhala limodzi - nanga bwanji osakhala pachibwenzi mozama?

Wokondedwa yemwe ali ndi mantha odzipereka atha kukhala ndi zovuta pazokambiranazi. Amatha kusintha nkhaniyo kapena kuyankha zosamveka mukawafunsa momwe akumvera.

Amatha kunena zonga, "Tizingosangalala osayesa kufotokoza zinthu." Atha kunena mosabisa kuti sakufuna kudzipereka.

Ngati mukufuna kudzipereka, mayankho awa nthawi zambiri amasonyeza kuti munthu amene mukumuwonayo sangathe kukupatsani zomwe mukufuna komanso zomwe mukufuna.

Amakhala ovuta kutsegula kapena kugawana malingaliro ozama

Kuwonongeka m'maganizo kumathandiza anthu kuyandikira.

Mu maubwenzi olimba, okwatirana nthawi zambiri amaphunzitsana wina ndi mnzake mofanana nthawi ikadutsa. Mutha kukambirana za zomwe mudutsa, zokumana nazo muubwana, zolinga zamtsogolo, nzeru za moyo, komanso momwe mumamvera, kuphatikiza kukondana wina ndi mnzake kapena momwe mumakhudzira anthu ena kapena zochitika.

Wina yemwe zimakhala zovuta ndi kudzipereka mwina sangamasuke mosavuta, ngakhale patadutsa miyezi ingapo. Zokambirana zanu zimangokhala zopanda pake komanso zopepuka, osayamba kukondana kapena kukhudza momwe mukumvera kapena zokumana nazo.

Kuvuta kukhala pachiwopsezo kungatanthauze kuti wokondedwa wanu amangofunika nthawi. Koma itha kugwirizananso ndi mantha odzipereka.

Amakambirana zamtsogolo, koma zolinga zawo sizikukukhudzani

Anthu ena omwe amapewa kudzipereka pachibwenzi amakhala ndi zovuta kupanga malonjezo ena m'mbali zina za moyo. Mwina sangakonde lingaliro lakumverera kutsekeredwa kapena kumangirizidwa ku tsogolo limodzi kapena zotulukapo. Koma sizikhala choncho nthawi zonse.

Ndikosavuta kumva kuwawa ngati wina amene muli naye pachibwenzi akunena zamtsogolo zomwe zikuwoneka kuti sizikukuphatikizani, makamaka ngati zinthu zikuwoneka kuti zikuipiraipira malinga ndi momwe mumaonera.

Mwina amapitilizabe kukonzekera maulendo ndi tchuthi cha iwo eni kapena anzawo popanda kukuitanani. Kapenanso amalankhula mosangalala komanso mwatsatanetsatane za nyumba ya studio ya maloto omwe sangathe kudikirira kuti aikepo ndalama.

Ndizotheka kuti sakufuna kungoganiza kuti mupitiliza kukhala pachibwenzi. Mwinanso kuti sanaperekepo malingaliro okhalitsa kwa nthawi yayitali.

Koma zikwangwani izi zitha kuwonetsanso kuti mnzakeyu sali wokonzeka kuchita.

Samayankha mauthenga anu, mafoni, kapena zolemba kwa masiku

Ngati mwakhala mukuchita chibwenzi ndi wina kwakanthawi, mutha kuyamba kuwona momwe amayankhira. Amatha kukhala chete pakadutsa 8 koloko masana.mukamasuntha musanagone kapena osakuyankhani konse panthawi yogwira ntchito.

Mwambiri, ndizomveka kuyembekezera mnzanu kuti ayankhe pasanathe tsiku nthawi zambiri, pokhapokha mutadziwa kuti sangapezeke pazifukwa zina.

Ngati nthawi zonse simukuyankhidwa, makamaka mukamayesetsa kupanga mapulani, kapena mukalandira mayankho theka omwe samayankha bwino funso lanu, mungafune kuti mubweretse izi pamaso.

Ndizotheka mnzako samangokonda mameseji. Koma izi zitha kutanthauzanso kusapezeka m'maganizo.

Mosasamala chifukwa chake, sangakwanitse kuchita china chilichonse.

Kuthana ndi mantha odzipereka

Nkhani zodzipereka muubwenzi sizovuta nthawi zonse.

Kuyanjana kwanthawi yayitali, kukhala ndi mkazi mmodzi si aliyense. Anthu ambiri amakhala miyoyo yawo, okondwa kukhala osakwatiwa kapena kukhala ndi zibwenzi zosiyanasiyana, osakwatirana kapena kukhazikika.

Anthu ena ali okonzeka kudzipereka kutengapo gawo kwanthawi yayitali, osati ndi munthu m'modzi yekha.

Komabe, ngati mukufuna kukulitsa kudzipereka kwanu kapena mukumva kuti pali china chilichonse chamantha chomwe chikukulepheretsani, ganizirani izi:

Mankhwala payekha

Therapy ndi malo abwino kuyamba kuwunika zifukwa zomwe kudzipereka kungakhale kovuta kwa inu.

Zifukwazi zitha kukhazikitsidwa pamaubwenzi am'mbuyomu, zokumana nazo zaubwana, kapena kalembedwe kanu.

Zingakuthandizeni kuyankhula ndi wothandizira ngati chimodzi mwazizindikiro pamwambapa chikukukhudzani. Atha kukuthandizani kuthana ndi mantha odzipereka munjira yachifundo, yopanda chiweruzo.

Ngati kuopa kwanu kudzipereka kumayambitsa nkhawa kapena nkhawa, chithandizo chitha kuthandizanso pamenepo.

Wothandizira amathanso kuthandizira chithandizo chamodzi ndi m'modzi ngati machitidwe a mnzanuyo akukhudza thanzi lanu lam'mutu, koma chithandizo cha maanja chingakhale malo ena ogwirira ntchito pa izi.

Maanja othandizira

Ngati mumakondadi wokondedwa wanu ndipo mukufuna kuti mgwirizanowo ugwire ntchito, koma china chake chikukulepheretsani ndikukulepheretsani kuchitapo kanthu podzipereka, chithandizo cha maanja chitha kuthandiza.

Chibwenzi ndi kudzipereka sizofanana, koma nthawi zambiri zimakhudzana. Anthu omwe ali ndi vuto ndi m'modzi amathanso kukhala ndi zovuta ndi mnzake.

Katswiri wothandizana ndi maanja atha kukuthandizani inu ndi mnzanu kuthana ndi mavutowa ndikuyamba kulimbana nawo kuti mukhale ndi mgwirizano wolimba.

Chithandizo cha maanja chimagwira ntchito bwino ngati inu ndi mnzanu muli ndi zolinga zofanana paubwenzi. Koma ngakhale m'modzi wa inu akafuna china chake, kapena m'modzi kapena nonse simukudziwa kwenikweni zomwe mukufuna, mankhwala othandizira akhoza kukuthandizani kuti mufufuze izi.

Lankhulani za izi

Nthawi zina, kungolemba dzina mantha anu kungakuthandizeni kumva bwino za izi. Ngati mumasamala za wokondedwa wanu koma mukudziwa kuti muli ndi vuto lodzipereka, yesetsani kuyankhula nawo.

Adziwitseni momwe mumamvera za iwo komanso ubalewo ndipo yesetsani kuwauza ndendende zomwe mukuwopa, ngati zingatheke.

Mutha kunena monga, "Ndidakumana ndi chibwenzi choyipa zaka zingapo zapitazo, ndipo zidanditengera nthawi yayitali kuti ndichiritse. Ndikuopa kuti ndidzadutsanso. Ndimakukondani, ndipo ndimakonda kumene izi zikupita, koma ndikufuna nthawi yochulukirapo kuti ndizolowere lingaliro la kukhala pachibwenzi. ”

Yesetsani kudzipereka

Ngati inu ndi mnzanu mukufuna kuti banja lanu liziyenda bwino koma m'modzi kapena nonse muli ndi mantha odzipereka, zitha kuthandiza kukulitsa zizolowezi zanu limodzi.

Khalani ndi chizolowezi

Yesani izi:

• Khalani usiku pamodzi.
• Khalani limodzi kumapeto kwa sabata limodzi mtunda wautali kuchokera mtawuniyi.
• Gwiranani manja pagulu kapena mozungulira anthu omwe mumawadziwa.
• Kambiranani za zinthu zomwe mukufuna kuchitira limodzi munthawi ina ndikuwona momwe zimamvera. Mwachitsanzo, mwina nonse mukufuna kuganiza zopanga misasa chilimwe chamawa.
• Pangani mapulani limodzi sabata limodzi, milungu iwiri, kenako mwezi pasadakhale. Dziyesereni nokha kuti musunge mapulaniwo.
• Yang'anani pa nyumba kapena nyumba limodzi, ngati ndi pomwe ubale wanu ukupita. Izi zitha kukhala zophweka ngati kupita kokayenda mdera lomwe mumakonda ndikuganiza momwe zingakhalire kugawana malowa ndi mnzanu.

Ngati mukuchita mantha kapena kuda nkhawa mukamachita izi, kambiranani za izi ndi mnzanu.

Funani mnzanu amene amalemekeza zosowa zanu

Ngati mukudziwa kuti mukusowa nthawi kuti mukhale otetezeka mu chibwenzi, zingakuthandizeni kukhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu yemwe safunikira kuti azikhala madzulo aliwonse limodzi komanso amene sangakukakamizeni kuti muchite nthawi yomweyo.

Izi zitha kutengera zomwe mukufuna kuchokera kwa mnzanu, inde. Koma munthu yemwe amakhala ndi moyo wotanganidwa atha kukhala woyenera ngati mukudziwa kuti mumafunikira malo ambiri komanso nthawi yanokha.

Ngati simusangalala kukhudzidwa pafupipafupi, mnzanu yemwe ali ndi manja ambiri akhoza kukhala woyenera kuposa munthu amene amafunikira kukondedwa kwambiri.

Mfundo yofunika

Kuopa kudzipereka ndi nkhani yovuta. Zinthu zingapo zimatha kuyambitsa, ndipo zinthuzi zimatha kusiyanasiyana munthu ndi munthu.

Ngakhale kuti kudzipereka kungapangitse chibwenzi kukhala chovuta kwambiri, sizimapangitsa maubwenzi apamtima, okhalitsa kukhala osatheka. Zinthu zimangotenga ntchito yowonjezera komanso kulumikizana moona mtima.

Crystal Raypole adagwirapo ntchito ngati wolemba komanso mkonzi wa GoodTherapy. Magawo ake achidwi akuphatikiza zilankhulo ndi mabuku aku Asia, kumasulira kwachijapani, kuphika, sayansi yachilengedwe, chiyembekezo chogonana, komanso thanzi lamaganizidwe. Makamaka, akudzipereka kuthandiza kuchepetsa manyazi pazokhudza matenda amisala.