Kutentha Kwambiri Komwe Kunandipangitsa Kuti Ndisiye Kuganizira Tsitsi Langa Lathupi

Zamkati

• Ndinapitiliza kumeta tsiku lililonse, ngati sikunali tsiku lililonse - mpaka sindinathe
• Ndikudziwa kuti palibe amene amasamala ngati ndimeta kapena sindimeta koma, kwanthawi yayitali, ndimamva zambiri pamwamba pazinthu ndikukonzekera moyo ndikametedwa miyendo

Thanzi ndi thanzi zimakhudza aliyense wa ife mosiyanasiyana. Iyi ndi nkhani ya munthu m'modzi.

Ndimakumbukira bwino tsiku lomwe ndinawona tsitsi langa la mwendo kwa nthawi yoyamba. Ndinali pakati pa kalasi ya 7 ndipo ndinatuluka kusamba pamene, nditayatsa moto, ndidawawona - tsitsi lofiirira losawerengeka lomwe lidakula m'miyendo mwanga.

Ndinaitana mayi anga m'chipinda china, "Ndiyenera kumeta!" Anatuluka ndi kukagula mafuta amodzi ochotsera tsitsi kuti ndigwiritse ntchito, poganiza kuti zingakhale zosavuta kuposa kuyesa lezala. Zakudya zonona zija zidandipatsa chidwi, zomwe zidandikakamiza kuti ndisiye msanga. Pokhumudwa ndinayang'ana pansi pa tsitsi lomwe linatsalalo, ndikudzimva kukhala wauve.

Kuyambira pamenepo, lingaliro loti ndiyenera kuchotsa tsitsi lonse lathunthu lidakhalabe chosasintha m'moyo wanga. Kukhala wometedwa bwino ndichinthu chomwe ndimatha kuwongolera zinthu zambiri zikamakhala mlengalenga. Ngati nditawona tsitsi lalitali lomwe latsalira pa bondo kapena bondo, zimandisokoneza kuposa momwe ndimavomerezera. Ndinkapita m'chigawochi bwinobwino ndikameta ndevu - nthawi zina tsiku lomwelo.

Ndinapitiliza kumeta tsiku lililonse, ngati sikunali tsiku lililonse - mpaka sindinathe

Ndili ndi zaka 19, ndidamaliza chaka changa chachinyamata ku koleji kunja kwa Florence, Italy. Lachisanu lina usiku, ndinali nonse, ndipo ndinali kuthamangira kumaliza ntchito yanga.

Sindikukumbukira chifukwa chake, koma ndimakhala ndikuwotcha madzi pasitala mumphika ndikuwotcha msuzi poto wina, ndidaganiza zosintha zowotchera ... nthawi yomweyo. Mukuthamanga kwanga ndikunyamula, sindinaime kulingalira kuti mphika wa pasitala udapangidwa kuti uzichitika mbali zonse ndipo nthawi yomweyo udayamba kugwedezeka.

Madzi otentha owiritsa adandithira mwendo wanga wamanja wonse, ukundipsa kwambiri. Ndinalibe mphamvu kuti ndiyimitse popeza cholinga changa chinali kuteteza poto linalo kuti lisanditayire. Nditachita mantha, ndidavula zovala zanga, ndikukhala pansi ndikumva kuwawa.

Sizingadabwe aliyense kuti tsiku lotsatira, ndinakwera ndege m'mawa kwambiri kupita ku Barcelona. Ndinali kuphunzira kunja ku Europe pambuyo pake.

Ndinagula mankhwala opweteka ndi mabandeji ku fakesi ya m'deralo, ndinapewa kupanikizika mwendo wanga, ndipo ndimakhala kumapeto kwa sabata kumeneko. Ndinapita ku Park Güell, ndikuyenda m'mbali mwa nyanja, ndikumwa sangria.

Poyamba, zimawoneka ngati zazing'ono, kuwotcha sikunapweteke nthawi zonse, koma patadutsa masiku angapo kuyenda, ululuwo udakwezedwa. Sindingathe kuyika kwambiri mwendo. Sindimetanso masiku atatuwo ndipo ndimavala mathalauza pomwe ndimatha.

Pofika nthawi yomwe ndimabwerera ku Florence Lolemba usiku, mwendo wanga udadzaza ndi malo akuda ndikutulutsa zilonda ndi zipsera. Sizinali zabwino.

Chifukwa chake, ndidachita zomwe ndidachita ndikupita kwa dokotala. Anandipatsa mankhwala ndi bandeji yayikulu kuti ndidutse theka lonse la mwendo wanga wakumanja. Sindingathe kuthira mwendo ndipo sindimatha kuvala mathalauza pamwamba pake. (Izi zonse zidachitika kumapeto kwa Januware pomwe ndimadwala chimfine ndipo pomwe Florence amatentha nthawi yozizira, sizinali choncho kuti ofunda.)

Pomwe kuzizira ndikuyamwa ndikusamba matumba apulasitiki kumiyendo yanga, zonsezi sizinayerekezeredwe ndi kuwona tsitsi langa lakumbuyo likubwerera.

Ndikudziwa kuti ndikadakhala kuti ndidayang'ana kwambiri nkhanambo yakuda kwambiri yomwe idapangitsa anthu kuti andifunse ngati "ndawomberedwa". (Inde, ichi ndi chinthu chenicheni chomwe anthu adandifunsa.) Koma kuwona tsitsi lakuthwa pang'onopang'ono ndikukula lidandipangitsa kumva kuti ndine wosayera komanso wosokonezeka monga ndidalili tsiku lija pomwe ndidaziwona koyamba.

Kwa sabata yoyamba, ndinameta mwendo wanga wakumanzere koma posakhalitsa ndinamva ngati wopusa kungometa. Bwanji kuvutikira pomwe winayo amamva ngati nkhalango?

Monga zimakhalira ndi chizolowezi, ndikakhala kuti sindimachichita motalikirapo, ndipamene ndimayamba kuzindikira kuti sindimeta. Zinali mpaka nditapita ku Budapest mu Marichi (maulendo apandege ndi otchipa kwambiri ku Europe!) Ndikuyendera malo osambira aku Turkey. Pagulu, nditavala suti, sindinkakhala womasuka.

Komabe, ndinadzimvanso womasuka ku miyezo yomwe ndinali nayo m'thupi langa. Sindinaphonye kukumana ndi malo osambira chifukwa choti ndinali nditapsa komanso ndinali ndi miyendo yaubweya. Ndinakakamizika kusiya kufunikira koti ndiwongolere tsitsi langa, makamaka mu suti yosamba. Zinali zowopsa, koma sindinalole kuti izi zindiyimitse.

Ndiroleni ine ndikhale womveka, abwenzi anga ambiri amatha milungu ingapo, kapena kupitilira apo, osameta miyendo. Palibe cholakwika chilichonse ndikulola tsitsi lanu kuti likule ngati ndizomwe mukufuna kuchita. Malinga ndi Vox, kumeta sikunakhale chinthu chokhazikika kwa azimayi mpaka zaka za m'ma 1950 pomwe zotsatsa zidayamba kukakamiza azimayi kutero.

Ndikudziwa kuti palibe amene amasamala ngati ndimeta kapena sindimeta koma, kwanthawi yayitali, ndimamva zambiri pamwamba pazinthu ndikukonzekera moyo ndikametedwa miyendo

Mwamaganizidwe, zimangondipangitsa kumva kuti ndili ndi zinthu limodzi. Ndinkachita nthabwala kwa anthu kuti ndimatha kukhala ndekha pachilumba chopanda anthu ndipo ndimametabe miyendo yanga.

Zinatha miyezi inayi mpaka inali nthawi yoti ndipite kunyumba ku New York. Moona mtima panthawiyo, ndikadakhala ndayiwala za tsitsi lomwe likukula. Ndikulingalira mukawona kena kokwanira nthawi zambiri mumasiya kudabwa nazo. Nyengo ikayamba kutentha ndipo ndinazolowera kuwona tsitsi langa, mwamwayi ndikuwunikiridwa ndi dzuwa, ndidasiya kuganizira mozama.

Nditabwerera kunyumba ndikumuuza dokotala kuti andiyese mwendo, adatsimikiza kuti ndadwala kwambiri. Ndinafunikirabe kupewa kumeta malo okhudzidwa mwachindunji, chifukwa mitsempha inali pafupi ndi khungu, koma ndimatha kumeta mozungulira.

Tsopano ndimameta ndevu kangapo pa sabata ndipo ndimangokhala ndi zipsera zochepa chifukwa chakupsa. Kusiyanitsa ndikuti tsopano sindimangodandaula nthawi zonse ndikapeza tsitsi lomwe ndayiwala kapena kuphonya masiku angapo. Kuyesetsa kuthana ndi nkhawa zanga kungathandizenso.

Kodi ndine wokondwa ndikusinthana ndikuwotchedwa posaganiziranso za tsitsi langa la mwendo? Ayi, zinali choncho kwenikweni zopweteka. Koma, ngati ziyenera kuchitika, ndine wokondwa kuti ndidakwanitsa kuphunzirapo kanthu pazomwe zidachitikazo ndikusiya zina zofunika kuzimeta.

Sarah Fielding ndi wolemba ku New York City. Zolemba zake zawonekera ku Bustle, Insider, Men's Health, HuffPost, Nylon, ndi OZY komwe amalemba chilungamo chachitukuko, thanzi lamaganizidwe, thanzi, maulendo, maubale, zosangalatsa, mafashoni ndi chakudya.