Momwe Ndidatulukira Zokhudza Kukhumudwa Kwanga Ndikugwira Ntchito

Zamkati

• Kusintha kwa malingaliro
• Momwe mungakonzekerere 'Kukambirana'
• Maphunziro omwe ndaphunzira
• 1. Matenda okhumudwa ndi matenda monga ena onse
• 2. Si ine ndekha amene ndikulimbana ndi matenda a maganizo kuntchito
• 3. Olemba ntchito ochulukirachulukira amathandizira kuchipatala
• Kusandutsa malo anga ogwirira ntchito kukhala malo otetezeka
• Wakale ine, ndi ine wonse

Kwa nthawi yonse yomwe ndakhala ndikugwira ntchito, ndakhala ndikudwala matenda amisala. Koma mukadakhala wantchito mnzanga, simukadadziwa.

Anandipeza ndi matenda ovutika maganizo zaka 13 zapitazo. Ndidamaliza maphunziro anga kukoleji ndipo ndidayamba ntchito zaka 12 zapitazo. Monga ena ambiri, ndimakhala molingana ndi chowonadi chomwe sindinathe ndipo sindimayenera kuyankhula za kukhumudwa kuofesi.Mwinanso ndidaphunzira izi powonera abambo anga akulimbana ndi kukhumudwa kwakukulu kwinaku akuchita bwino pantchito zalamulo. Kapena mwina ndichinthu chachikulu kuposa zomwe ndimakumana nazo - zomwe ife monga gulu sitikudziwa momwe tingachitire nazo.

Mwina zonsezi.

Kaya zifukwa zake zinali zotani, pantchito yanga yonse, ndimabisalira anzanga. Ndikakhala ndikugwira ntchito, ndimakhaladi. Ndidakula ndi mphamvu yochita bwino ndikumva kukhala wotetezeka m'malire a akatswiri anga. Kodi ndingakhale bwanji wokhumudwa pomwe ndimagwira ntchito yofunika kwambiriyi? Kodi ndingamve bwanji nkhawa ndikapezanso kuwunikanso kwa magwiridwe antchito?

Koma ndidatero. Ndinayamba kuda nkhawa komanso kumva chisoni pafupifupi theka la nthawi yomwe ndinali kuofesi. Pambuyo pa mphamvu zanga zopanda malire, ntchito zadongosolo, ndikumwetulira kwakukulu, ndinali chipolopolo chamantha komanso chotopa ndekha. Ndinkachita mantha kukhumudwitsa aliyense ndipo ndinkangokhala mopitirira muyeso. Kulemera kwachisoni kumandiphwanya pamisonkhano komanso pakompyuta yanga. Ndikumva misozi ikuyambanso kugwa, ndimathamangira ku bafa ndikulira, kulira, kulira. Kenako ndiwaza nkhope yanga ndi madzi ozizira achisanu kuti aliyense asadziwe. Nthawi zambiri ndimachoka muofesi ndili wotopa kwambiri kuti ndingachite china chilichonse kuposa kungogona. Ndipo sindinauzepo abwana anga mavuto anga - ngakhale kamodzi.

M'malo molankhula za zodwala, ndimangonena monga: "Ndili bwino. Ndangotopa lero. " Kapena, "Ndili ndi zambiri m'mbale yanga pompano."

“Ndi mutu chabe. Ndikhala bwino. "

Kusintha kwa malingaliro

Sindinadziwe momwe ndingasakanizire Professional Amy ndi Depression Amy. Amawoneka ngati awiri otsutsana, ndipo ndidatopa ndikumangika komwe kumakhalapo mwa ine. Kunamizira ndikokutsitsa, makamaka mukamachita maola eyiti mpaka 10 patsiku. Sindinali bwino, sindinali bwino, koma sindinaganize kuti ndiyenera kuuza aliyense kuntchito kuti ndikulimbana ndi matenda amisala. Kodi ndingatani ngati ogwira nawo ntchito atasiya kundilemekeza? Bwanji ngati atandiwona ngati wopenga kapena wosayenera kugwira ntchito yanga? Ndingatani ngati kuwulula kwanga kungachepetse mwayi wamtsogolo? Inenso ndinali wofunitsitsa kuthandizidwa ndipo ndinkachita mantha ndi zotulukapo zomwe ndikanakhala ndikupempha.

Chilichonse chinandisinthira mu Marichi 2014. Ndinali ndikulimbana ndi miyezi ingapo mankhwala atasintha, ndipo kukhumudwa kwanga ndi nkhawa zinali kutha. Mwadzidzidzi, matenda anga amisala adakula kwambiri kuposa zomwe ndimatha kubisa kuntchito. Polephera kukhazikika, ndikuopa chitetezo changa, ndidadzifufuza ku chipatala cha amisala koyamba m'moyo wanga. Kupatula momwe lingaliro ili lingakhudzire banja langa, ndinali kuda nkhawa kwambiri za momwe zingawonongere ntchito yanga. Kodi anzanga angaganize chiyani? Sindingaganize kuti ndingakumanenso ndi aliyense wa iwo.

Pokumbukira nthawi imeneyo, ndikutha kuona tsopano kuti ndinali kukumana ndi kusintha kwakukulu. Ndinayang'anizana ndi msewu wamiyala kutsogolo, kuyambira kudwala mpaka kuchira ndikubwerera kukhazikika. Pafupifupi chaka chimodzi, sindinathe kugwira ntchito nkomwe. Sindingathe kuthana ndi kukhumudwa pobisalira Professional Amy wangwiro. Sindingathenso kunamizira kuti ndili bwino, chifukwa mwachidziwikire sindinali. Ndinakakamizika kufufuza chifukwa chake ndimayang'ana kwambiri ntchito yanga komanso mbiri yanga, ngakhale zovulaza zanga.

Momwe mungakonzekerere 'Kukambirana'

Nthawi yoti ndibwerere kuntchito itakwana, ndimamva ngati ndiyambiranso. Ndinafunika kutenga zinthu pang'onopang'ono, kupempha thandizo, ndikudziikira malire.

Poyamba, ndinkachita mantha ndi chiyembekezo chouza bwana watsopano kuti ndikulimbana ndi kukhumudwa komanso kuda nkhawa. Tisanayambe kukambirana, ndinawerenga malangizo angapo ondithandiza kuti ndikhale womasuka. Awa ndi omwe adandigwirira ntchito:

1. Chitani izi pamasom'pamaso. Kunali kofunika kuyankhula pamasom'pamaso osati pafoni, ndipo osatinso kudzera pa imelo.
2. Sankhani nthawi yoyenera kwa inu. Ndidapempha msonkhano pomwe ndimakhala chete. Zinali bwino kuulula osalira kapena kukulitsa malingaliro anga.
3. Chidziwitso ndi mphamvu. Ndinawafotokozera zambiri zokhudza kukhumudwa, kuphatikizapo kuti ndimafuna thandizo la akatswiri pa matenda anga. Ndidabwera ndi mndandanda wazinthu zofunikira kwambiri, ndikufotokozera ntchito zomwe ndimamva kuti ndikwanitsa kuthana ndi komwe ndikufunika thandizo lina. Sindinawafotokozere zambiri monga yemwe adandithandizira kapena mankhwala omwe ndimamwa.
4. Khalani akatswiri. Ndidawathokoza chifukwa chondithandizira komanso kumvetsetsa kwa abwana anga, ndipo ndidatsimikiza kuti ndimamvabe kuti ndikwanitsa kuchita ntchito yanga. Ndipo ndidasungitsa zokambiranazo mwachidule, osapewa kufotokoza zambiri zakumdima wachisokonezo. Ndinawona kuti kuyandikira zokambiranazo mwaukadaulo komanso moona mtima kumakhazikitsa mayendedwe abwino.

Maphunziro omwe ndaphunzira

Momwe ndimakhazikitsanso moyo wanga ndikupanga zisankho zatsopano, kuntchito komanso pamoyo wanga, ndidaphunzira zochepa zomwe ndikulakalaka ndikadadziwa kuyambira pomwe ndidayamba ntchito yanga.

1. Matenda okhumudwa ndi matenda monga ena onse

Matenda amisala nthawi zambiri amamva ngati vuto lochititsa manyazi kuposa matenda oyenera. Ndikulakalaka ndikadatha ndikayesetsa pang'ono. Koma, monga momwe mungafunire kuti musachokere matenda ashuga kapena matenda amtima, njirayi sinagwirepo ntchito. Ndinayenera kuvomereza kwathunthu kuti kukhumudwa ndimatenda omwe amafunikira chithandizo chazachipatala. Si vuto langa kapena kusankha kwanga. Kusintha kwamalingaliro uku kumafotokozera bwino momwe ndimathana ndikutaya mtima pantchito. Nthawi zina ndimafunikira tsiku lodwala. Ndinasiya kulakwa ndi manyazi, ndipo ndinayamba kudzisamalira ndekha.

2. Si ine ndekha amene ndikulimbana ndi matenda a maganizo kuntchito

Matenda amisala amatha kukhala okhaokha, ndipo nthawi zambiri ndimakhala ndikuganiza kuti ndiine ndekha amene ndikudwala. Kudzera pakupulumuka kwanga, ndidayamba kuphunzira zambiri za anthu angati omwe amakhudzidwa ndimatenda amisala. Pafupifupi munthu m'modzi mwa akulu asanu ku United States amakhudzidwa ndimatenda amisala chaka chilichonse. M'malo mwake, kukhumudwa kwamankhwala kumachitika padziko lonse lapansi. Ndikamaganizira za ziwerengerozi mmaofesi anga, zimatsimikizika kuti sindinali ndipo sindili ndekha polimbana ndi kukhumudwa kapena nkhawa.

3. Olemba ntchito ochulukirachulukira amathandizira kuchipatala

Kusalidwa kwamankhwala am'maganizo ndichinthu chenicheni, koma kumvetsetsa kwakukula kwamomwe thanzi lamaganizidwe limakhudzira ogwira ntchito, makamaka m'makampani akulu omwe ali ndi madipatimenti othandizira anthu. Funsani kuti muwone buku la ogwira ntchito abwana anu. Zolemba izi zikuwuzani zomwe muyenera kudziwa zokhudza ufulu wanu ndi maubwino anu.

Kusandutsa malo anga ogwirira ntchito kukhala malo otetezeka

Kwa ntchito yanga yonse, ndimakhulupirira kuti sindiyenera kuuza aliyense kuti ndili ndi vuto la kupsinjika. Pambuyo pa gawo langa lalikulu, ndimamva ngati ndikufunika kuuza aliyense. Lero ndakhazikitsa malo apakati pantchito. Ndapeza anthu ochepa omwe ndimawadalira kuti ndiwafotokozera momwe ndikumvera. Ndizowona kuti sikuti aliyense ali womasuka kulankhula za matenda amisala, ndipo nthawi zina ndimalankhulidwa osadziwa kapena owawa. Ndaphunzira kuchotsa mawu awa, chifukwa si chithunzi cha ine. Koma kukhala ndi anthu ochepa omwe ndingawafotokozere zakukhosi kumandithandiza kuti ndizidzimva kuti ndili ndekhandekha komanso kumandithandiza kwambiri panthawi yomwe ndimakhala muofesi.

Ndipo kutsegula kwanga kumapangitsa malo otetezeka kuti nawonso atsegule. Pamodzi tikuthana ndi manyazi okhudza thanzi lamaganizidwe pantchito.

Wakale ine, ndi ine wonse

Kudzera mukugwira ntchito molimbika, kulimba mtima, komanso kudzifufuza, Amy waumwini wakhala Professional Amy. Ndine wathunthu. Mkazi yemweyo yemwe amalowa mu ofesi m'mawa uliwonse amatuluka mmenemo kumapeto kwa tsiku logwira ntchito. Nthawi zina ndimakhalabe ndi nkhawa ndi zomwe anzanga amaganiza za matenda anga amisala, koma ndikaganiza, ndimazindikira kuti ndi chizindikiro cha kukhumudwa kwanga ndi nkhawa.

Pazaka 10 zoyambirira pantchito yanga, ndidagwiritsa ntchito mphamvu zanga zambiri kuwoneka bwino kwa anthu ena. Mantha anga akulu anali oti wina angazindikire ndikundinyalanyaza chifukwa chokhala ndi nkhawa. Ndaphunzira kuyika zabwino zanga patsogolo kuposa zomwe wina angaganize za ine. M'malo mowononga maola ochulukirapo ndikuchita zinthu mopitilira muyeso, ndikuwonetsetsa, ndikuyerekeza, ndikuyika nyongoyi kutsogolera moyo weniweni. Kulola zomwe ndachita ndikwanira. Kuzindikira ndikayamba kutopa. Kupempha thandizo. Kukana ngati ndikufunika kutero.

Chachikulu ndichakuti kukhala bwino ndikofunika kwambiri kwa ine kuposa kuwoneka ngati wabwino.

Amy Marlow ali ndi nkhawa komanso matenda amisala wamba, ndipo ndiye mlembi wa Buluu Woyera Buluu, yemwe adatchedwa mmodzi wa athu Mabulogu Abwino Kwambiri. Tsatirani iye pa Twitter pa @chantika_cendana_poet.