Zifukwa 5 Simuyenera Kulola Anzanu Akukhazikitseni

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Nthawi ina m'moyo wanu, mwina mumaganizira kuti anzanu akukhazikitsani tsiku kapena munapangana nawo. Zikuwoneka ngati lingaliro labwino ngati - ngati muli abwenzi ndi onse awiri, ayenera kukhala ndi zofanana ndipo mwina akhoza kuzimenya, sichoncho? Osati ndendende. Kafukufuku watsopano wochokera ku Harvard Business School adapeza kuti kupanga matchmatch kumabweretsa chisangalalo kwa opanga masewera koma osati kwa omwe akuyamba. [Tweet izi!]

"Ngakhale zikuwoneka kuti abwenzi anu ndi omwe angakhale osangalatsa kwambiri chifukwa amakudziwani bwino komanso zomwe mumakonda kwambiri, chowonadi ndichakuti kuwakhazikitsa kumatha kubweretsa zovuta zambiri," atero a Christie Hartman, Ph.D. , katswiri wa zamaganizidwe komanso katswiri wa zibwenzi ku Denver. Ganizirani zinthu zisanu izi ndikuganiza kawiri musanalole anzanu kusewera Cupid.

1. Zitha Kuwononga Ubwenzi Wanu

Nenani kuti mnzakoyo akukhazikitsani ndi bwenzi lake John. Iye ndi wamkulu-mpaka, mwadzidzidzi, amakuwonetsani. Mumatembenukira kwa bwenzi lanu kuti likuthandizeni, koma m'malo mokwera msinkhu wanu, akukalipira ndikunena kuti akuchokapo pa izi - kukusiyani mutentha. "Mnzako akakukhazikitsani, amangokhala munthu wapakati, zomwe zimatha kuyambitsa mikangano yambiri pakati panu awiri," akutero Hartman. "Mutha kuyika udindo pa iye ngati zinthu sizikuyenda bwino, pomwe zotsatira zake sizovuta." Ndipo masewera olakwikawo amatha kusokoneza ubwenzi wanu.

Njira ina yomwe kukhazikitsa kungawonongere BFF ndikuti ngati mukuganiza kuti machesi anu ndiopanda pake ndipo simukukhulupirira kuti lingaliro loti anali wokwanira kuti mulowe muubongo wake kwa mphindi yachiwiri. "Ngati bwenzi lako likukhazikitsa ndi munthu yemwe sakugwirizana ndi mfundo zako, ungaganize kuti sakuganiza kuti ndiwe munthu wabwino," akutero Hartman. Ndipo ngakhale mutakhala kuti mukuganiza zabodza, zomwe mukuganiza kuti zingakhale zowona ndizokwanira kuyambitsa nkhondo yosafunikira komanso yowopsa.

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2. Mukumva Kukakamizidwa Kukhala Chibwenzi

Tiyerekeze kuti m'malo mwa John akukuzungulirani, mumatopa naye ndikumutha. Koma mumadziona kuti ndinu wolakwa kwambiri pothetsa chibwenzicho naye chifukwa ali “m’banja” moti mumalola kuti zinthu ziyendere kwa nthawi yaitali kuposa mmene ziyenera kukhalira. "Mukalola anzanu kuti akukhazikitseni, pamapeto pake mumayika pachiwopsezo ufulu wanu wokhala pachibwenzi chifukwa mumawona kuti muli ndi ngongole kuti apatse anzawo mwayi wotalikirapo kuposa momwe mungaperekere ena," akufotokoza Marni Battista, wothandizira zibwenzi komanso ubale ku Los Angeles komanso woyambitsa Dating with Dignity. Kudzimva kuti muli m'bokosi kungakupangitseni kuchitira mwamuna yemwe akufunsidwayo mokhumudwa chifukwa chokhumudwa, Battista akuwonjezera, zomwe zingamupweteke kwambiri kuposa ngati mutadula maubwenzi pa nthawi yoyenera.

3. Imaphimba Chiweruzo Chanu

Kupsyinjika komweku "m'banja" kumatha kukhala ndi zotsatirapo zina kwa inu: Popeza kuti John anafufuzidwa kale, ndikosavuta kudumpha kuti mwina mudzamenya naye nkhondo. Musanadziwe, mumangolota za masiku awiri odabwitsa omwe mungapitilize ndi bwenzi lanu ndi chibwenzi chake - ndipo mwina maukwati anu ndi mayina a ana nawonso. Chenjerani, mtsikana! "Vuto la ziyembekezo zazikulu ndikuti zimatha kukupangitsani kukhala kovuta kuti mutenge zinthu momwe zikubwera, komanso kukuvutitsani kuzindikira ngati awiri simuli oyenera," akutero Hartman. Chifukwa mukufuna kuti zinthu ziyende bwino kwambiri, mutha kuyesa kukakamiza kulumikizana komwe kulibe. Kapenanso, mutha kumangoganiza za iye m'malo mongomuwona, yemwe angakhale munthu amene simukuyenera inu. Mulimonse momwe zinthu zilili, chokhumudwitsa ndichakuti mukakhala ndi ziyembekezo zanu zapamwamba, mumakhumudwa kwambiri ngati sizikuyenda bwino - ngakhale atakhala kuti sanakufananizeni kuyambira pomwe mukupita. [Tweet izi!]

4. Mnzanu Akhoza Kukhala Ndi Zolinga Zina

Mwayi mnzanu mwina akuyesera kukukhazikitsani ndi zofuna zanu zokha. Komabe pali kuthekera kwakanthawi koti mwina akumupweteketsa John ndipo pazifukwa zilizonse samakhala womasuka kuti apite kwa iye-chifukwa chake aganiza zokhala nanu limodzi, kuti akhale ndi choti akambirane naye. "Ndikuwona izi kwambiri ndi makasitomala anga," Battista akuti. "Zomwe zimachitika ndikuti mnzakeyo amayamba kulankhulana ndi mnyamatayo, motero amakhala mnzake, motero amapanga chidwi chabodza." Ndipo mumasiyidwa opanda chibwenzi choyenera.

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5. Ndizovuta kuthana ndi Kugawanika

Nthawi zambiri mukamaliza zinthu ndi winawake, mutha kutsuka ndi kusamutsata pa Instagram ndi Twitter ndikumuseweretsa pa Facebook. Koma ngati abwenzi a mnyamatayo ndi mnzanu, mudzamuwonabe pa intaneti komanso pamasom'pamaso. "Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi bwenzi la mnzako kumapangitsa kuti pakhale zovuta kwambiri chifukwa mumapitilizabe kumva zazing'onozing'ono za iye kudzera mumtengo wamphesa, ndipo atha kujambulidwa pazithunzi za Facebook ngakhale simukugwirizana naye," Battista akuti. Mwanjira ina, amakhala akuzungulira nthawi zonse, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kuti mupite patsogolo.

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