Zinthu 6 Zomwe Muyenera Kupempha Nthawi Zonse Muubwenzi

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Mu fayilo ya Dalirani Nthawi, takhala okonzeka kudziwa zomwe tingafunse abwana athu kuti akafike pamzere wotsatira pantchito. Koma zikafika pofotokoza zosowa zathu ndi S.O., ndizovuta kukhala otsogola-ngakhale zitakhala zofunikira monga kukhutira pantchito kuti tikhale achimwemwe. Koma kukhala omveka pazomwe mukufuna pachibwenzi chanu kumatsimikizira kuti inu ndi anyamata anu muli patsamba limodzi - komanso kuti ubale wanu ukhale wokhutiritsa komanso wokwaniritsa momwe mungathere. Apa, akatswiri amagawana zomwe muyenera kufunsa.

Kukhulupirika

Osaluma lilime lanu ngati akuganiza zosamukira kumayiko ena pomwe simungaganize kuti mukukhala ku Los Angeles. “Kuona mtima nthawi zambiri kumawononga maubwenzi chifukwa cha zolinga zabwino; wokwatirana naye amafuna kuti mnzakeyo akhale wosangalala, motero angasokoneze choonadi kuti apewe mkangano,” akufotokoza motero Ellen Kenner, Ph.D., wolemba nawo buku la Njira Yodzikonda Yokondana: Momwe Mungakondere Ndi Kukonda ndi Kulingalira. M'kupita kwanthawi, kukhala chete osaganizira momwe mukumvera kumatha kubweretsa mkwiyo komanso mtunda. Osati kukumba kusuntha kudutsa dziko? M’malo mongokambirana naye nthawi yomweyo, m’funseni mmene akuganizira kuti kusamukako kungasinthe moyo wake. Mwanjira imeneyi, mutha kugawana zomwe mukuopa momwe kusunthaku kukhudza ubalewo ndikugawana zomwe mukuganiza, chifukwa chake zimakhala zokambirana m'malo mokangana.

Kugonana Kokhutiritsa

Mwinamwake izo zikutanthauza chiwonongeko nthawi iliyonse. Mwina zimatanthawuza kuwonetseratu kochuluka, kapena kukumbatirana pansi pa zophimba mutatha kuchita. Chilichonse chomwe chingakhale, kutha kunena zomwe zimakupangitsani kuti musamavutike, akutero Jenni Skyler, Ph.D., katswiri wazogonana komanso ubale komanso wotsogolera ku The Intimacy Institute ku Boulder, CO. "Kwa maanja ambiri, kukambirana za kugonana. ndizovuta kwambiri kuposa kukhala nazo, "akutero Skyler. Khalani madzulo, mukufufuza matupi a wina ndi mnzake ndikuuzana, pamlingo umodzi mpaka khumi, zomwe zimamveka bwino.

Nthawi Yokhala Inu

"Maubwenzi ambiri amawonongeka chifukwa maubale amatanganidwa kwambiri pachibwenzi mwakuti amasiya kuzindikira zomwe zimawapangitsa kuti azisilira ngati munthu payekha. Ngakhale zili bwino kumadziona ngati banja, kukhala ndi zokonda zina kumasunga ukazitape komanso wapadera womwe adakukokerani nonse poyamba, "akufotokoza Kenner. Onetsetsani kuti nonse mumachita nanu pafupipafupi. Mwanjira zonse, muyitanireni ku gulu lanu lakupha Spin ndikuyesa naye masewera a gofu a Frisbee, koma khalani ndi zokonda zanu ndikulumikizananso pambuyo pake. Sikuti izi ndi zabwino paubwenzi wanu wokha - mudzakhala ndi zinthu zatsopano zoti mukambirane ndikuphunzira-koma zimatsimikiziranso kuti mudzakhala owona kwa inunso.

Kuchita Zachuma

Sitikunena kuti muyenera kutulutsa ma kirediti kadi yanu patsiku loyamba, koma mukangopeza ndalama, ndikofunikira kuti palibe amene akubisala chilichonse-ndipo nonse mukonzekere zamtsogolo, kaya ndi zolipira ukwati wanu kapena kupereka chindapusa panyumba. "Kusakhulupirika kwachuma kumatha kuwononga kwambiri ubale chifukwa kumafalitsa kusakhulupirika," adachenjeza a Kenner. Kukonzekera ulendo pamodzi kungakhale njira yabwino yochepetsera kugwirizana kwachuma ndi kukambirana nkhani zikayamba m'malo ovuta kwambiri. Mukaphunzira kuyankhula pogwiritsa ntchito ndalama mukamayesetsa kukwaniritsa cholinga china chonga gombe vaycay - kamvekedwe kakuyankhulidwa pazinthu zazikulu kwambiri.

Wothandizana Naye M'mavuto Abanja

Chimodzi mwa kuphatikiza miyoyo ndikuphatikiza mabanja, ndipo ndizofala nthawi zina kumakangana ndi banja lanu lofunika kwambiri. Koma akatswiri amavomereza kuti nthawi zonse muyenera kumverera ngati mnyamata wanu ali ndi nsana wanu poyamba, ndipo sangalole amayi kapena abambo ake kuti akupezereni chinachake. "Kumva ngati uli m'gulu la timu ndikofunikira," akukumbutsa motero Kenner. Yambani pomuuza momwe zimamvera: Chifukwa chakuti amakonda kuyankhulana nawo, sangazindikire kuti zomwe makolo ake anena zitha kutanthauzidwa kuti ndizovuta, akutero a Kenner. Kenako, muuzeni zimene zingathandize—mwinamwake ndi iye amene akutsogolera m’kukambitsirana nkhani imene yavuta pakati pa inu ndi amayi ake m’malo moti azingokhala chete inuyo mukukambirana.

Zosangalatsa!

M'moyo watsiku ndi tsiku, ndizosavuta kutaya chikondi, kupusa, ndi chisangalalo zomwe zidakukopani nonse awiri poyamba. Koma sizitanthauza kuti zili bwino, akukumbutsa Skyler. Kuzipanga kukhala tsiku lofunika kwambiri usiku, mauthenga okongola olembedwa pagalasi, kutenga tsiku limodzi kukacheza pabedi- zimatsimikizira kuti sizingasocheretsedwe.

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