Ndinalalikira Kukhala Ndi Thupi Labwino - Ndipo Ndinkamwa Nditangotsata Kudya Kwanga Nthawi Imodzi

Zamkati

• "F * inu, chikhalidwe cha zakudya!" Ndikufuula mokondwa. “Ndikudziwa bwino tsopano. Ndaphunzira phunziro langa.”
• Koma komwe kuli vuto lakudya kwakanthawi, vuto - {textend} ngakhale mutaloweza - {textend} sililowa m'malo mwa ntchitoyi
• “Sindikumvetsa momwe anthu amasankhira nthawi yoti adye,” ndinaulula motero kwa wondithandizira. Maso ake adachita chidwi ndi nkhawa yayikulu
• Zikanakhala zowona, sindikadakhala pano, ndikugawana nanu chowonadi chovuta chokhudza kuchira: Palibe njira zachidule, zopanda mawu, komanso zosakonzekera mwachangu
• Wanga wa ED adakonda naïveté ya thupi labwino la Insta, ndikuwonetsa chinyengo chachitetezo kuti andipusitse ndikuganiza kuti ndikulamulira, kuti ndili bwino kuposa izi zonse
• Othandizira ambiri omwe mumawayang'ana nawo adakhala ndi nthawi yofananira yosasangalatsa koma olimba mtima motere

Zomwe mumakhulupirira mumtima mwanu sizingathe kuchiritsa matenda amisala.

Sindimakonda kulemba zaumoyo wanga zinthu zikakhala "zatsopano."

Osati m'zaka zingapo zapitazi. Ndimakonda kulola kuti zinthu ziziyenda bwino, ndikuwonetsetsa kuti mawu omwe ndasankha ndi opatsa mphamvu, olimbikitsa, komanso koposa zonse, athetsedwa.

Ndimakonda kupereka upangiri ndikakhala mbali inayo - {textend} makamaka chifukwa ndikudziwa kuti ndili ndi udindo kwa owerenga anga, kuti ndiwonetsetse kuti ndikuwayendetsa bwino. Ndikudziwa kuti blog iyi ikhoza kukhala njira yothandizira anthu omwe amafunikira chiyembekezo. Ndimayesetsa kukumbukira zimenezo.

Koma nthawi zina, ndikamasungitsa bwino chiyembekezo chomwecho kwa omvera, ndimatha kudzinyenga ndikuganiza kuti ndaphwanya malamulowo, chifukwa chake, ndimatha kusiya zovuta m'mbuyomu. Mapeto omveka bwino a mutuwo, titero.

"Ndikudziwa bwino tsopano," ndikuganiza ndekha. “Ndaphunzira.”

Mukadakhala kuti Google "transgender thupi positivity," Ndikutsimikiza kuti zambiri mwazinthu zomwe ndalemba zidzabwera.

Ndakhala ndikufunsidwa za podcast ndi zolemba, ndipo ndanyamulidwa ngati chitsanzo cha munthu wosunthika yemwe - {textend} mosintha kosavuta ndikutsata ma akaunti oyenera a Insta - {textend} adadzafotokozeranso ubale wake ndi chakudya komanso thupi lake.

Ndalemba zonse zitatuzi. Zosangalatsa.

Zochitika zamtunduwu ndizomwe ndimakonda, chifukwa ndizosavuta komanso zotonthoza. Epiphany imodzi yowala, yowala, ndipo ine timakhala opambana, nditasinthika kupitirira nkhawa zilizonse zadziko, zopanda pake za kutambasula kwanga kapena kudya ayisikilimu pachakudya cham'mawa.

"F * inu, chikhalidwe cha zakudya!" Ndikufuula mokondwa. “Ndikudziwa bwino tsopano. Ndaphunzira phunziro langa.”

Mukakhala wochirikiza ndi wolemba zaumoyo, makamaka pagulu, ndizosavuta kudzinyenga poganiza kuti muli ndi mayankho onse pamavuto anu.

Koma chinyengo chodzilamulira ndikudziyesa ndendende - - textend} ndichinyengo, pamenepo.

Ndikosavuta kuloza zaka zomwe ndakhala mlengalenga, ndi zonse zomwe ndatulutsa pazinthu zenizeni izi, ndikutsimikiza kuti ndikuwongolera zinthu. Si rodeo yanga yoyamba, mnzanga. Kapena chachiwiri. Chachitatu. Chachinayi. (Ndili nawo zochitika kumbali yanga.)

Ngati ndingathe kuthandiza ena pochira, nditha kuyendetsa ndekha. Ngakhale ndikulemba izi, ndikudziwa kuti ndizoseketsa - {textend} kupereka upangiri wabwino ndikosavuta kuposa kuugwiritsa ntchito wekha, makamaka pomwe matenda amisala akukhudzidwa.

Koma mtundu wanga womwe ndimakonda ndi womwe udanenedwa poyankhulana uku, "Mukafika kutsidya lina la chilichonse chomwe mukulimbana nacho, muwona kuti musatenge mwayiwo - {textend} kukhala theka lokha moyo womwe ukadakhala ukudziwa - {textend} ndiwowopsa kwambiri kuposa tsoka lililonse lomwe umaganiza kuti lingachitike chifukwa chodya chidutswa cha keke kapena chilichonse chomwe chingakhale. ”

Akuti munthu yemwe, moona komanso moona, akukhala mwamantha mu moyo womwe amakhala theka pompano.

Kukhala ndi chidwi kwamthupi kumamveka ngati ubale womwe ndimalowa ndili mwana, ndisanadziwe ndekha kapena vuto langa lakudya. Ndipo nditakhala wakuya kwambiri, nditadziwona ndekha ngati wopambana, sindinadziwe momwe ndingabwerere mmbuyo kupempha thandizo.

Ndinkafuna kukhulupirira kuti zinali ngati chithumwa chomwe ndinganene pamaso pagalasi kangapo - {textend} “matupi onse ndi matupi abwino! matupi onse ndi matupi abwino! matupi onse ndi matupi abwino! ” - {textend} ndi NKHOSA! Ndidakhululukidwa kulakwa kulikonse, manyazi, kapena mantha omwe ndimamva pafupi ndi chakudya kapena thupi langa.

Nditha kunena zinthu zonse zolondola, monga cholembedwa chomwe ndimayeseza, ndimakonda lingaliro ndi chithunzi changa ndikamayang'ana magalasi ofiirawo.

Koma komwe kuli vuto lakudya kwakanthawi, vuto - {textend} ngakhale mutaloweza - {textend} sililowa m'malo mwa ntchitoyi

Ndipo palibe ma meme ndi zithunzi za Instagram zamafuta am'mimba zomwe zingakhudze mabala akale, opweteka omwe adayika chakudya ngati mdani wanga, ndi thupi langa ngati malo ankhondo.

Zomwe ndizoti, sindinachiritsidwe. Ntchitoyo inali isanayambike.

M'malo mwake, ndimagwiritsa ntchito kuyandikira kwa malo abwino kunyalanyaza lingaliro loti ndimafunikira thandizo - {textend} ndipo ndikulipira mtengo mwakuthupi, mwamalingaliro, komanso mwamalingaliro tsopano.

Ndidavala thupi labwino ngati chowonjezera, kuti ndidziwonetse ndekha momwe ndikufunira kukhala, ndipo vuto langa lakudya lidawululidwa poganiza kuti nditha kuyimitsa chenicheni cha matenda anga pothana ndi media yanga moyenera.

Kumvetsetsa kwanga kokhudzidwa kwa thupi - {textend} ndikuwonjezeranso, mizu yake pakulandila mafuta ndi kumasulidwa - {textend} sikunali kozama kwenikweni, koma chifukwa choti vuto langa la kudya lidakula bwino ndikadakhala ndichinyengo chomwe ndimadziwa bwino. Imeneyi inali njira inanso yotsimikizira kuti ndinali wolamulira, kuti ndinali wanzeru kuposa ED wanga.

Matenda anga anali ndi chidwi chondipangitsa kuti ndikhale wotetezeka. Sindingakhale ndi vuto la kudya, ndimaganiza - {textend} kudya kosokonezeka, mwina, koma ndani satero? Sindingathe chifukwa ndinali kusinthika. Monga ngati matenda amisala amapereka f * * k za mabuku omwe mwawerenga.

Mavuto akudya ali ndi njira yokuzembetsani. Kuzindikira kumeneku ndi kwatsopano kwa ine - {textend} osati chifukwa sindinamvetsetse izi, koma chifukwa ndangobvomereza m'mene ndimakhalira masiku ano.

Ndipo ndikulakalaka ndikadanena kuti epiphany iyi idabwera kwa ine ndekha, ndikundilimbikitsa kuti ndibwezere moyo wanga. Koma palibe kulimba mtima kotere pano. Zinangobwera pamwamba chifukwa chakuti dokotala adandifunsa mafunso oyenera nthawi zonse akamandipima, ndipo magazi anga adawulula zomwe ndimawopa kuti ndizowona - {textend} thupi langa likubwera litasoweka popanda chakudya chokwanira, chopatsa thanzi.

“Sindikumvetsa momwe anthu amasankhira nthawi yoti adye,” ndinaulula motero kwa wondithandizira. Maso ake adachita chidwi ndi nkhawa yayikulu

"Amadya ali ndi njala, Sam," anatero mokoma mtima.

Nthawi ina, ndinali nditaiwala mfundo yosavuta imeneyi. Pali makina mthupi, ofunikira kuti anditsogolere, ndipo ndimadula zomangira zonse.

Sindikugawana izi ngati kudzidzudzula ndekha, koma monga chowonadi chophweka: Ambiri a ife omwe timatamandidwa ngati nkhope zachiritso tidakali, m'njira zambiri, mkati mwanu.

Nthawi zina zomwe mukuwona si chithunzi cha kuchita bwino, koma, kachidutswa kakang'ono kosavuta, kosasangalatsa komwe timayesetsa kusonkhana mseri, kuti wina asazindikire kuti tadukaduka.

Kwenikweni, kuchira kwanga kuli ndi vuto kwambiri. Ndangosiya kumene kugwiritsa ntchito "kudya kosasokoneza" kuti ndisabise zenizeni, ndipo m'mawa uno, ndimalankhula ndi katswiri wazakudya yemwe ali ndi ma ED.

Lero m'mawa.

Lero, tsiku lenileni, ndiye tsiku loyamba kuchira. Ndizo zaka zitatu pambuyo pake, mwa njira, ndidalemba mawu awa: "Palibenso zifukwa zina. Palibenso zifukwa. Palibe tsiku lina ... izi sizolamulira. ”

Ndikudziwa kuti pali owerenga omwe mwina amayang'ana ntchito yanga mu thupi labwino ndikukhala ndi malingaliro olakwika akuti kusowa kwa zakudya (kapena mtundu wina uliwonse wamankhwala osasamala kapena kudana ndi chakudya) ndizovuta chabe zomwe timaganiza (kapena kwa ine, lembani) tokha ya.

Zikanakhala zowona, sindikadakhala pano, ndikugawana nanu chowonadi chovuta chokhudza kuchira: Palibe njira zachidule, zopanda mawu, komanso zosakonzekera mwachangu

Ndipo pamene tikukongoletsa lingaliro la kudzikonda kopezeka mosavuta - {textend} ngati kuti ndi mbeu imodzi yabwino - {textend} tiphonya ntchito yakuya yomwe iyenera kuchitidwa mwa ife tokha, kuti palibe kuchuluka kwa mawu osangalatsa, olimbikitsa tikulemba m'malo titha kusintha.

Zovuta sizili pamtunda, ndipo kuti tipeze pamtima pake, tiyenera kupita mozama.

Ichi ndi chowonadi choyipa komanso chosasangalatsa chomwe ndikukumana nacho - {textend} chachikulu, chothirira thupi chitha kutsegulira chitseko ndikutiitanira kulowa, koma zili kwa ife kuchita ntchito yochira.

Ndipo izi sizimayambira kunja, koma mkati mwathu. Kuchira ndi kudzipereka kosalekeza komwe tiyenera kusankha tsiku lililonse, mwadala komanso molimba mtima, moona mtima kwambiri kwa ife eni ndi makina athu othandizira momwe tingathere.

Ziribe kanthu momwe timasungira malo athu ochezera kuti atikumbutse komwe tikufuna kukhala, masomphenya omwe timapanga samalowerera m'malo mwa zomwe tikukhalamo.

Monga momwe zimakhalira ndimavuto akudya, ndikuzindikira, chikhumbo - {textend} kuti "chomwe chingakhale" - {textend} nthawi zambiri chimakhala chovuta, chosokoneza, komwe timakhala mtsogolo momwe sitimafika pa.

Ndipo pokhapokha titadzipereka kuti tikhale olimba pakadali pano, ngakhale (ndipo makamaka) zikavuta kukhala pano, timasiya mphamvu zathu ndikugwa pansi.

Wanga wa ED adakonda naïveté ya thupi labwino la Insta, ndikuwonetsa chinyengo chachitetezo kuti andipusitse ndikuganiza kuti ndikulamulira, kuti ndili bwino kuposa izi zonse

Ndipo sindinganene kuti ndikudabwitsidwa ndi izi - {textend} EDs akuwoneka kuti amatenga zinthu zambiri zomwe timakonda (ayisikilimu, yoga, mafashoni) ndikuzitsutsa mwanjira ina.

Ndilibe mayankho onse, kupatula kunena izi: Tili pantchito, tonse, ngakhale omwe mumawayang'anira.

Pansi pake pamakhala malo osungulumwa, ndipo kusungulumwa, ndikuganiza, ndipamene mavuto azakudya (ndi matenda amisala) nthawi zambiri amakhala bwino. Ndakhala kuno kwanthawi yayitali, ndikudikira mwakachetechete kuti ndigwe kapena kuti igwere pansi panga - {textend} iliyonse yomwe idabwera kaye.

Ndikamatsika, ndikutsika pang'onopang'ono ndikutsika, ndikuvomereza chowonadi chomwe aliyense wa ife ayenera kukumbukira: Palibe vuto kuti musakhale bwino.

Palibe vuto kukhala opanda mayankho onse, ngakhale dziko lonse lapansi likuyembekezerani, ngakhale mukuyembekezera wekha kuti.

Ine sindine, monga anthu ena andifotokozera, "nkhope ya transgender body positivity." Ngati ndili, sindikufuna kukhala - {textend} Sindikufuna aliyense wa ife akhale ngati izi zikutanthauza kuti sitiloledwa kukhala anthu.

Ndikufuna kuti muchotse chithunzicho m'maganizo mwanu, m'malo mwake, mudziwe komwe ndinali dzulo: Kumamatira kugwedezeka kwa zakudya m'moyo wokondedwa (kwenikweni - {textend} kwandisunga ndi moyo miyezi ingapo yapitayi), osasamba katatu masiku, ndikulemba mawu oti "Ndikuganiza kuti ndikufuna thandizo."

Othandizira ambiri omwe mumawayang'ana nawo adakhala ndi nthawi yofananira yosasangalatsa koma olimba mtima motere

Timachita tsiku lililonse, ngakhale tili ndi selfie yotsimikizira kuti zidachitika kapena ayi. (Ena aife tili ndi zolemba zamagulu, ndipo ndikhulupirireni, tonse tili pa Hot Mess Express limodzi. Lonjezani.)

Ngati mukumva ngati simukuloledwa "kulephera" (kapena kani, kukhala opanda ungwiro, osokonekera, ngakhale f * * kuyambiranso kuchira), ndikufuna ndikupatseni chilolezo chokhala choonadicho, ndi chilichonse za kuwona mtima komanso kusatetezeka zomwe mukufuna.

Palibe vuto kusiya kuchira. Ndipo ndikhulupirireni, ndikudziwa kufunsa kwakukulu, chifukwa magwiridwe anga anali bulangeti langa lachitetezo (komanso gwero la kukana kwanga), kwakanthawi.

Mutha kudzipereka kukaikira, mantha, komanso zovuta zomwe zimadza ndikumagwira ntchitoyi, ndikudzipatsa chilolezo chokhala munthu. Mutha kusiya izi ndipo - {textend} Ndikuwuzidwa, mulimonse - {textend} zonse zikhala bwino.

Ndipo gulu lodabwitsali lankhondo lomwe tidapangana ndi ma memes athu, mawu olimbikitsa, ndi nsonga zathu? Tikhala pano, kudikirira kuti tikuthandizireni.

Sindinganene kuti ndikudziwa izi (moni, Tsiku Loyamba), koma ndikukayikira kwambiri kuti kuwona mtima uku ndikomwe kukula kwenikweni kumachitika. Ndipo kulikonse komwe kuli kukula, ndapeza, ndipomwe kuchiritsa kumayambira.

Ndipo ndi zomwe ife timayenera, aliyense wa ife. Osati machiritso amtundu wokhumba, koma zinthu zakuya.

Ndikufuna zimenezo kwa ine. Ndikufuna izi kwa tonsefe.

Nkhaniyi idayamba kuwonekera pano mu Januware 2019.

Sam Dylan Finch ndi mkonzi waumoyo ndi matenda ku Healthline. Ndi blogger kumbuyo kwa Let Queer Things Up!, Pomwe amalemba za thanzi lam'mutu, kulimbitsa thupi, komanso kudziwika kwa LGBTQ +. Monga loya, ali ndi chidwi chokomera anthu kuti achire. Mutha kumupeza pa Twitter, Instagram, ndi Facebook, kapena phunzirani zambiri pa samdylanfinch.com.