Momwe Mungapezere Crush - Ngakhale Muyenera Kuwawona Tsiku Lililonse

Zamkati

• Landirani momwe mukumvera
• Ipatseni nthawi
• Ganizirani zakupweteketsani kwanu moona mtima
• Lirani kutayika kwa zomwe mumayembekezera
• Pewani kulola malingaliro anu kukuwonongani
• Lankhulani za izi
• Ngati muli kale pachibwenzi
• Khalani kutali ndi malo ochezera
• Onetsani momwe mukumvera
• Musamachite ubwenzi monga mphotho ya chitonthozo
• Lankhulani ndi mnzanu
• Dzichotseni nokha
• Yesaninso chibwenzi
• Chitani zinthu zomwe mumakonda
• Pezani chithandizo cha akatswiri
• Mfundo yofunika

Kukhala ndi kugwa kwatsopano kumatha kukhala kosangalatsa. Mukuyembekezera kudzawaona ndikukhala olimbikitsidwa, ngakhale kusangalala, mukamacheza limodzi. Kutengera ndi momwe zinthu ziliri, pakhoza kukhala mwayi woti zokambiranazo ndizofanana.

Pamene ubale wanu ndi mnzanu supita kulikonse, mungamve, chabwino,wosweka. Ndipo kumverera kumeneko sikodabwitsa.

Mwinamwake kukondana kwanu kumaphatikizapo winawake wosalamulira, monga mnzanu wokwatira kapena pulofesa. Crushes izi ndizabwino, komabe zimakhala zovuta kuti zitheke, ngakhale mutadziwa kuyambira pachiyambi kuti simungatenge nawo gawo.

Mutha kukhumudwa kwambiri mukamakhumudwa ndi kupezeka koma sikubwezeretsa malingaliro anu.

Pamapeto pake, zitha kukhala zopanda vuto chifukwa chakumenyedwa kwanu sikukwaniritsidwa: Kupwetekedwa mtima kumamvanso chimodzimodzi. Ngati mukuvutika kuti mupite patsogolo, malangizo awa 14 akhoza kukuthandizani.

Landirani momwe mukumvera

Musanayambe kukhumudwa, muyenera kuvomereza. Kuli kofala kukana malingaliro achikondi poyamba, makamaka ngati mukuphwanya mnzanu wabwino, woyang'anira wanu, kapena aliyense amene mumamuwona kuti simungafikeko.

Kuzindikira ndi kuvomereza ndi njira zofunika kwambiri pochira. Zophwanya ndizabwinobwino, ngakhale zomwe zimachitika kwa anthu omwe simudziwa kuwatsata.

Kukankhira pansi malingaliro anu kumatha kukulepheretsani kuzigwiritsa ntchito m'njira zopindulitsa. M'malo mwake, amatha kuzengereza, ndikupweteketsa mtima.

"Kuvomereza momwe mukumvera ndikulola malo anu kuti musinthe momwe mukumvera ndikutulutsa malingaliro anu kungakuthandizeni kuyamba kudzimva mosiyana ndi munthuyo kenako kupita patsogolo," akufotokoza a Kim Egel, wothandizira ku San Diego.

Ipatseni nthawi

Zowawa zomwe kupsinjika kumatha kuyambitsa ndizabwino konsekonse.

Ngati simunena zakukhosi kwanu momwe mumamvera, mwina simungamane ndi kukanidwa. Koma zimapwetekabe chiyembekezo chanu chikakwaniritsidwa.

Mwamwayi, kuphwanya nthawi zambiri sikukhalitsa, ngakhale mutha kumva kuti mudzakhala omvetsa chisoni kwamuyaya. Ndizofala kwambiri kuti kulimba mtima kwanu kumachepa pakangotha ​​milungu ingapo kapena miyezi ingapo.

Kuchuluka kwa nthawi yomwe zimatengera kuti muchepetse kukhumudwa kumatha kusiyanasiyana, komabe. Mutha kudzisamalira pakadali pano mwa:

• kugona mokwanira komanso kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi
• kudzithandiza nokha ndi zolankhula zokha
• kuyesa maubwino akuchiritsa kapena yoga
• kuthera nthawi m'chilengedwe

Ganizirani zakupweteketsani kwanu moona mtima

Zophwanya nthawi zambiri zimaphatikizapo kulingalira, makamaka ngati simukumudziwa bwino munthuyo. Mutha kuyang'ana pazikhalidwe zawo zabwino, osanyalanyaza zinthu zomwe sizabwino kwenikweni.

Ngakhale inu ndi mnzanuyo mumatha kumvana bwino mwanjira zina, nthawi nthawi zambiri zimawulula kusiyanasiyana kwakukulu pamikhalidwe yayikulu. Mwina ndinu wosadyeratu zanyama zilizonse ndipo amadya nyama, kapena ndi auzimu kwambiri ndipo inu simuli.

"Kuchita zowonekera nokha kudzakuthandizani kuno," akutero Egel. "Kuyang'ana moona mtima zenizeni ndikofunikira kuti mupite patsogolo."

Ikani pambali zinthu zomwe mumakonda za iwo kwakanthawi ndikudzifunsa nokha za mikhalidwe yawo ina. Kodi zikugwirizana ndi zomwe mukufuna muubwenzi wanthawi yayitali?

Lirani kutayika kwa zomwe mumayembekezera

Kuponderezana komwe sikupita kulikonse kumagawana zofananira ndi kukana komanso chikondi chosafunsidwa. Ngakhale kukondweretsana kwakanthawi kungakhale, kumakhudza kumverera kwenikweni komanso kupweteka kwenikweni.

Khalani ndi nthawi yokhala pansi ndi izi. Mungafunike nthawi yochulukirapo kuti mumvetse zakukhosi kwanu kuchokera kuzinthu zazitali kapena zopweteka kwambiri.

Dziloleni muyang'ane nthawi yomwe mudamverera zedi adakubwezerani chikondi, zipsinjo zomwe mumamva, kapena masiku ndi kulumikizana komwe mumayembekezera. Imeneyi ndi njira yachisoni, choncho ndibwino kumva chisoni ndikukhumudwa kapena kudabwa chifukwa chake zinthu sizingayende.

Pewani kulola malingaliro anu kukuwonongani

Ndikofunika kufotokoza malingaliro anu kuti muthe kuthana nawo. Koma kuzengereza pa iwo kumatha kukulepheretsani kuchitapo kanthu kuti mupange chibwenzi ndi munthu yemwe amapezeka komanso wokondana naye.

Kulankhula za kupsinjika kwanu nthawi zonse kapena kuthera nthawi yochuluka mukuwonanso zowawa zakukanidwa kumakhala kovuta kupitiliza.

Mukamva kuti muli mumkhalidwe wolakwika, yesani:

• kuvomereza mosamala malingaliro omwe amabwera, kenako kuwalola kuti apite
• kuganiza "kupatula" malingaliro okhumudwitsa mpaka mutha kuwasanthula bwino
• kudodometsa ndi zomwe mumakonda

Lankhulani za izi

Ngati mukuvutika kugwira ntchito kudzera momwe mukumvera, kugawana ndi munthu amene mumamukhulupirira kungakuthandizeni. Amatha kukuthandizani kuti mukhale ndi malingaliro owonjezera, makamaka ngati mukuyesera kuwona moona mtima momwe aliri olimba kapena kulingalira zifukwa zomwe bwenzi lanu siliri lofananira.

Yesani:

• kulankhula ndi okondedwa
• Kulankhula ndi munthu amene mumamudalira yemwe amadziwanso kukwatirana kwanu
• kulemba malingaliro anu mu nyuzipepala kapena kalata, zomwe simuyenera kutumiza

Ngati muli kale pachibwenzi

Anthu omwe ali pachibwenzi chodzipereka atha kupwetekabe. Izi zitha kukhala zosokoneza komanso zosautsa, koma si zachilendo, ndipo sizitanthauza kuti muyenera kutha. Zitha kuthandiza kukambirana ndi mnzanu zakukhumudwitsidwa. Fotokozani kuti mukugwira ntchito ndipo simukufuna kuchitapo kanthu.

Kukhala woona mtima kumalimbitsa chidaliro ndikupangitsa kulumikizana kwambiri. Kuphatikiza apo, ngati wopondanayo ndi mnzake, mungasankhe kuwawona pang'ono. Wokondedwa wanu sangamvetse chifukwa chake ngati sakudziwa zomwe zikuchitika.

Khalani kutali ndi malo ochezera

Palibe vuto kuvomereza: Zimakhala zokopa kuti muwone zithunzi zaposachedwa za munthu wina kapena kuti muone ngati ali pachibwenzi ndi aliyense. Koma akakukanani kapena mukaganiza zosawatsata, ndibwino kuti muchepetse kulowerera kwanu pa digito.

FOMO - mantha apaderawa akusowa omwe atolankhani amayambitsa - amachitikanso ndi ma crushes, nawonso. Kugwiritsa ntchito malo ochezera a pa TV kuti muwone m'miyoyo yawo kumapangitsa kukhala kosavuta kulingalira zogawana nawo moyo umenewo.

Kukhala ndi ma digito olumikizidwa ndi digito kudzera pa Facebook kapena Instagram kumatha, motero, kukulitsa malingaliro achisoni posowa mwayi wokhala nawo.

Simusowa kuchitapo kanthu mpaka kalekale, monga kuwatsegulira kapena kuwaletsa, koma zitha kuthandiza kuwatsata ndikupewa zinthu monga:

• kuwunika zolemba zatsopano kapena ndemanga
• kulakalaka zosintha za ubale
• kutumiza zinthu zopangidwa kuti zikope chidwi chawo

Mukadali pano, dzikumbutseni kuti zoulutsira mawu nthawi zambiri zimasinthidwa, zithunzi zochepa chabe - osati zowonetsa zolondola za moyo watsiku ndi tsiku.

Onetsani momwe mukumvera

Mukamacheza ndi wina ndikugawana zofooka, ndizosavuta kukulitsa kumayandikira komanso kukopa. Maganizo abwinowa amatha kukhala osiririka, ngakhale munthu wina atakhala kuti sakukondana.

Makhalidwe monga kukoma mtima, luntha, komanso kuseketsa zimatha kukopa. Koma simuyenera kukhala ndi chibwenzi kuti mupitirize kusangalala ndi izi.

Osakana malingaliro abwino omwe amadzutsa. M'malo mwake, muwaganizireni ngati phindu pa mgwirizano wanu womwe ulipo ngati ukuwona ngati chinthu chomwe mungathe kuchita. Anthu ambiri amakhulupirira kuti kukondana kumaimira pachimake pakukwaniritsa ubale, koma mutha kukhala ndi ubale wolimba, wopanda chibwenzi.

Musamachite ubwenzi monga mphotho ya chitonthozo

Kupanga chibwenzi pomwe kukondana sikutheka ikhoza kukhala njira yabwino kwambiri yoyandikirana ndi munthu amene mumamukonda - mukamayipeza ndi malingaliro oyenera.

Ubwenzi womangidwa pamalingaliro akuti, "Chabwino, ngati sitingathe kukhala pachibwenzi, ndikuganiza kuti ubwenzi ndi chinthu chotsatira kwambiri," sichitha. Mukalowa muubwenzi mobisa mukukhulupirira kuti pamapeto pake adzakukondaninso, mwina nonse mutha kukhumudwa pamapeto pake.

M'malo mwake, yamikirani ubwenzi pazabwino zake, osati monga njira yosangalatsa yochitira chibwenzi. Maubwenzi onse atha kukhala ndi phindu lalikulu, ndipo ubwenzi ndi wofunikira pamoyo monga wachikondi. Ena amazilingalira Zambiri zofunika.

Lankhulani ndi mnzanu

Kuuza anzanu momwe mumamvera nthawi zambiri kumakhala kuweruza kwanu. Ngati ndinu abwenzi apamtima, mungadandaule za kutayika kwaubwenzi ndikusankha kudikirira kuti iwo adutse.

Ngati kukondana kuli kofanana, kuwauza momwe mumamvera kungayambitse chibwenzi. Ngakhale sizogwirizana, akulu akulu amatha kuthana ndi kuwulula zakukondana mwachisomo komanso mwachifundo. Ndiponsotu, iwo mwina anakumanapo ndi zoterezi.

Akakukanani, ndibwino kuti muzingowachitira monga momwe mumachitira nthawi zonse. Kuwapewa kungatanthauze kuti china chake sichili bwino pakati panu, zomwe zingayambitse zovuta kuntchito kapena mafunso kuchokera kwa anzanu.

Kudzipatsa nokha pang'ono kungathandize kuchepetsa ululu wakukanidwa. Ngati mumakonda kukhala nthawi yayitali limodzi, fotokozani kuti mukufuna kukhalabe abwenzi koma mukufuna malo ena pakadali pano. Awa ndi yankho labwino, lomwe mwina amvetsetsa.

Mutha kukhala okhumudwa, okwiya, komanso osokonezeka chifukwa chomwe sangathe kukuwomberani, makamaka ngati ndinu abwenzi apamtima. Kumbukirani: Simungakakamize zokopa kapena chikondi, ndipo sangathe kuthandiza momwe akumvera kuposa momwe mungathere.

Dzichotseni nokha

Poyesayesa kuthana ndi chisoni chaubwenzi uliwonse, kuchokera pa cholephera cholephera mpaka kutha koyipa, zosokoneza ndizofunikira.

Zitha kuwoneka kuti chilichonse chimakukumbutsani zakusokonekera kwanu, makamaka ngati muli abwenzi kapena mumakonda zambiri. Izi nthawi zambiri zimapweteka kwambiri, popeza simungathe kutembenukira ku nyimbo zomwe mumakonda kapena kuchita nawo.

Ngati ndi choncho kwa inu, ino ndi nthawi yoyesa zatsopano. Chitani zosangalatsa zatsopano zomwe mukufuna kuyesa. Yambitsani chiwonetsero chatsopano m'malo moyang'ana (kapena momvetsa chisoni) kuwonera chiwonetsero chomwe mudakondwera nacho.

Anzanu ndi abale omwe amadziwa zomwe mukukumana nazo amathanso kukuthandizani kuti musamangokhalira kukhumudwa powalimbikitsa komanso kuwalimbikitsa kuti asokonezeke.

Yesaninso chibwenzi

Kukulitsa malingaliro a munthu watsopano kungakhale ngati chimodzi cha zosokoneza. Ngakhale palibe cholakwika ndi kudziponyera nokha ku dziwe la zibwenzi, yesetsani kutero ndi cholinga komanso momveka bwino.

Mwachitsanzo, zindikirani zomwe mukufuna mwa mnzanu zisadafike. Kudzifunsa nokha zomwe mwapeza mukukondana kwanu kumatha kukupatsani chidziwitso apa.

Ngati muli ndi njira yosunthira kuchokera kuphwanyaphwanya mpaka kukuphwanya, yesani kuyang'ana zomwe zapangitsa izi. Kuwongolera nthawi yomweyo malingaliro osafunsidwa kwa wina yemwe sangawabwezeretse si njira yothandiza kwambiri yopitilira.

Ngati mupitiliza kupanga mabulosi omwe sagwira ntchito, zitha kuthandiza kuti mupeze zifukwa zomwe zimapangitsa izi, nokha kapena ndi othandizira.

Chitani zinthu zomwe mumakonda

Kugwiritsa ntchito nthawi yanu pazinthu zomwe mumakonda sikungathetse chikondi chanu, koma nthawi zambiri kumathandizira kukulitsa kudzikonda komanso kudzidalira. Zitha kuthandizanso kukulitsa malingaliro anu komanso kukhala ndi moyo wabwino.

Ndikosavuta kugwa munjira zakuganiza zomwe zikusonyeza kuti simuli okwanira popanda chikondi kapena ubale. Koma ndizotheka kukhala wokhutira, ngakhale wokondwa, wopanda mnzake.

Simukuyenera kusiya kupeza chikondi. Kugwira ntchito kuti mukhale munthu wabwino kwambiri komanso kuchita zinthu zomwe mumakonda nthawi zonse kumatha kukuthandizani kukhala ndi moyo wopindulitsa mpaka mutadzakhala chitanipezani munthu yemwe akuyenererani.

Pezani chithandizo cha akatswiri

Therapy imatha kuthandizira ngati ntchito yanu yabwinobwino yasokonekera, Egel akuwonetsa. Amafotokoza kuti chithandizo nthawi zambiri chimakhala chosankha chabwino mukavutika kuchita zinthu zomwe mumakonda kapena zimawavuta kupeza chisangalalo m'moyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku.

Kulankhula ndi othandizira kungathandizenso mukamachita izi:

• kumva kuti watsekerezedwa m'malingaliro osalimbikitsa
• amavutika kukwaniritsa zosowa zodzisamalira
• kumva kukhala wachisoni, wosungulumwa, kapena wopanda chiyembekezo
• khalani ndi nkhawa mopitirira muyeso pomwe simukuwona kapena kumva kuchokera kukuzunzani kwanu

Mfundo yofunika

Ngati mukuyesera kuthana ndi kukhumudwa, musataye mtima podziwa kuti anthu ambiri akhala komwe muli. Zophwanya ndizofala, ndipo mwina mupitiliza kukhala ndi zina zambiri.

Ingokumbukirani: Kuponderezedwa kopanda kanthu sikukhudzana ndi kukhala kwanu woyenera kapena kuti ndinu munthu wotani. Nthawi zina, zimakhala zophweka monga kusagwirizana ndi munthu yemwe mumamugwera.

Kuzindikira kuti palibe mwayi wokhala ndi zibwenzi nthawi zonse sikungalepheretse kukondana, kapena kukuthandizani kuti mutheangathethandizo ndi nthawi. Mwina sizikuwoneka ngati izi pakadali pano, koma posakhalitsa, malingaliro anu mwina sangakhale ovuta kwambiri. Amatha kuzimiriratu.

Crystal Raypole adagwirapo ntchito ngati wolemba komanso mkonzi wa GoodTherapy. Magawo ake achidwi akuphatikiza zilankhulo ndi mabuku aku Asia, kumasulira kwachijapani, kuphika, sayansi yachilengedwe, chiyembekezo chogonana, komanso thanzi lamaganizidwe. Makamaka, akudzipereka kuthandiza kuchepetsa manyazi pazokhudza matenda amisala.