Kukhala Ndi Matenda Ofooketsa Kunandiphunzitsa Kuyamikira Thupi Langa

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Osandidandaula, koma ndiyimirira pa bokosi la sopo ndikulalikira pang'ono tanthauzo la kukhala othokoza. Ndikudziwa kuti mwina mukuyang'ana maso-palibe amene amakonda kuphunzitsidwa-koma bokosi lothokoza lomwe ndayimilirapo ndi lalikulu, ndipo pali malo ochulukirapo kuno. Chifukwa chake ndikuyembekeza kuti ndikamaliza, muganiza zoyimirira nane pano. (Zovala ndizotheka, koma tinene kuti kapangidwe kanga kabokosi kansalu kamakhala ndi ma sequin, opangira mwendo, komanso nsalu yolowera nsomba.)

Choyamba, ndiloleni ndifotokoze chifukwa chake ndikuganiza kuti muyenera kundimvera.

Anandipeza ndi matenda a Crohn ndili ndi zaka 7. Panthawiyo, matendawa anali osokoneza, koma analinso NBD chifukwa sindimamvetsetsa zomwe zimachitika ku thupi langa laling'ono-kapena, molondola, lowonda komanso loperewera. Madokotala anandipatsa mlingo wochuluka wa ma steroid, ndipo ndinabwerera ku moyo wanga wosavuta wa sitandade yachiwiri m’masiku oŵerengeka chabe. Ndikuganiza kuti tonse titha kuvomereza kuti moyo unali wosavuta kwambiri pomwe nkhawa yanu yayikulu inali mayeso amawu.

Zinanditengera pafupifupi zaka makumi awiri kuti ndimvetsetse kuopsa kwa matenda anga. Munthawi yonse yasekondale komanso kukoleji, ma Crohn anga amatha, kutanthauza kuti ndikadwala zowawa m'mimba mwadzidzidzi, kutsegula m'mimba pafupipafupi komanso mwachangu (sindinanene kuti uwu unali achigololo soapbox), malungo akulu, kupweteka pamafundo, komanso kutopa kwambiri. Koma ma steroid omwewo ankandithandiza kuti ndiyambenso kuchita bwino mwamsanga ndiponso mogwira mtima, choncho kunena zoona, matenda anga sindinkawaganizira kwambiri. Zinali zofooketsa pang’ono, ndiyeno ndinakhoza kuiŵala kwa kanthaŵi. Ganizirani izi: Mukuthyoka dzanja ndikusewera masewera. Imayamwa, koma imachiritsa. Inu mukudziwa izo akhoza zichitikenso koma simukuganiza ndidzatero zichitikanso, chifukwa chake mubwerere ku zomwe mumachita kale.

Zinthu zinayamba kusintha nditakalamba. Ndinapeza ntchito yomwe ndinkalakalaka monga mkonzi wa magazini ndipo ndinali kukhala ku New York City. Ndinayamba kuthamanga, ndipo ndinathamanga kwambiri, monga kale ndinali wovina, sindinkayembekezera kuchitapo kanthu pofuna kusangalala. Ngakhale kuti zonsezi zitha kumveka bwino papepala, kuseri, matenda anga a Crohn adayamba kukhala okhazikika m'moyo wanga.

Ndinali mumoto wowoneka ngati wopanda malire womwe unatha zaka ziwiri-ndizo zaka ziwiri za ~ 30 maulendo opita kuchimbudzi tsiku lililonse, zaka ziwiri zosagona usiku, ndi zaka ziwiri za kutopa. Ndipo tsiku lililonse lomwe limakulirakulirabe, ndimamva ngati moyo womwe ndimagwira molimbika kuti uchoke. Ndinadwala kwambiri moti sindikanatha kupita kuntchito, ndipo abwana anga—monga wokoma mtima ndi womvetsetsa monga momwe anachitira—anandipempha kuti ndipite kutchuthi kuchipatala kwakanthaŵi. Pulojekiti yanga yokhudzidwa, blog yanga, Ali pa Run, idakhala yocheperako ndimayendedwe anga opambana tsiku lililonse, maphunziro othamanga, komanso mndandanda wanga wa "Zikomo Zinthu Lachinayi" mlungu uliwonse, komanso zambiri zamavuto anga azaumoyo, zokhumudwitsa, komanso nkhondo zamisala zomwe ndimamenya. Ndinayamba kutumiza kawiri patsiku ndikupita mdima kwa milungu ingapo chifukwa ndinali ndi mphamvu zopanda pake ndipo palibe chabwino choti ndinene.

Kupangitsa kuti izi ziipireipire, chinthu chimodzi chomwe nthawi zonse chimandipangitsa kuti ndizimva bwino komanso wokhazikika-chinali chapita, nanenso. Ndidathamanga ndikuwotcha kwanga malinga ndi momwe ndingathere, ngakhale zitatanthauza kupanga malo osambiramo khumi ndi awiri panjira, koma pamapeto pake, ndimayenera kuyima. Zinali zowawa kwambiri, zosathandiza, zachisoni kwambiri.

Ndinali wachisoni, wogonjetsedwa, ndipo ndimadwaladi. Mosadabwitsa, ndinadandaula kwambiri panthawiyi. Poyamba ndinkadana nazo. Ndinkawona othamanga athanzi ndipo ndinkachita nsanje kwambiri, kuganiza kuti "moyo suli bwino." Ndinkadziwa kuti zimenezo sizinathandize, koma sindikanachitira mwina. Ndinkadana nazo kuti pamene anthu ambiri anali kudandaula za nyengo kapena sitima zapansi panthaka zodzaza ndi anthu kapena kugwira ntchito mochedwa-zinthu zomwe zinkawoneka. kotero zazing'ono kwa ine panthawiyo-zonse zomwe ndimafuna kuchita ndikungothamanga ndipo sindinathe chifukwa thupi langa linali kundilephera. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti zokhumudwitsa za tsiku ndi tsiku sizovomerezeka, koma ndidadzipeza ndekha ndikumvetsetsa zatsopano zomwe zili zofunika kwambiri. Chifukwa chake nthawi yotsatira mukadzakhala pagalimoto, ndikukulimbikitsani kuti mulembe. M'malo mokwiya ndi magalimoto ochuluka, khalani othokoza chifukwa cha zomwe mumapeza kuti mubwere kunyumba.

Ndidapanga njira yanga yotuluka m'zaka ziwirizi, ndipo ndidakhala nthawi yayitali ya 2015 pamwamba pa dziko lapansi. Ndinakwatira, ndikukwaniritsa maloto anga opita ku Africa safari, ndipo ine ndi mwamuna wanga watsopano tidatenga mwana wagalu. Ndinalowa mu banki ya 2016 mchaka chazithunzi. Ndinkakonzekeranso kuthamanga, ndipo ndinkayendetsa zolemba zanga mu 5K, theka la mpikisano, ndi mpikisano. Ndikadaziphwanya ngati wolemba komanso mkonzi pawokha, ndipo ndikadakhala mayi wabwino kwambiri wagalu.

Pakati pa chaka, komabe, zonse zidabwerera, zikuwoneka ngati usiku. Kupweteka m'mimba. The cramping. Mwazi. Malo osambira 30 amayenda tsiku. Mosafunikira kunena, chaka chophwanya zolinga chomwe ndidakonza chinasintha molakwika ndipo chakhala panjira imeneyo kwa nthawi yopitilira chaka tsopano. Ndidzakhala weniweni ndi inu: Ndinakhala ngati sizikuchitika kwakanthawi. Ndinalemba zolemba za blog ngati kuti ndili kwenikweni woyamikira chifukwa cha dzanja lomwe ndathandizidwa. Ndidapeza zinthu zazing'ono zoti ndizisangalatse za-FaceTiming ndi mphwake ndi mphwake, pulogalamu yatsopano yotenthetsera yothandizira kutontholetsa m'mimba-koma pansi pansi ndimadziwa kuti anali kutsogolo.

Kenako, masabata angapo apitawa, mnzanga wokondedwa ananena zomwe zidasintha zonse. "Ndizovuta, Feller, ndipo zimayamwa, koma mwina ndi nthawi yoti mudziwe momwe mungakhalire moyo wanu wodwala ndikuyesa kukhala achimwemwe."

Ndani?

Ndinawerenga lembalo ndipo ndinalira chifukwa ndimadziwa kuti akunena zoona. Sindingathe kukhala ndi phwando lomwelo. Chifukwa chake tsiku lomwelo mnzanga adanditumizira mameseji tsiku lomwe ndidasankha kuti sindidzakhumudwitsanso munthu wathanzi yemwe amawoneka ngati wosavuta. Sindingayerekezere zabwino zanga ndi zamunthu wina aliyense. Ndikanagwiritsa ntchito malingaliro amodzi (mosokonezeka maganizo omwe ndidakumana nawo chifukwa cha matenda a Crohn) omwe ndayesera kukumbatira ngakhale masiku amdima kwambiri, malingaliro omwe adasintha dziko langa-kuyamika.

Tikamagwira ntchito mwatcheru-pomwe tili Ali mkonzi, wothamanga, blogger, ndi Ali mkazi ndi amayi agalu-ndikosavuta kuzinyalanyaza. Ndinatenga thanzi langa, thupi langa, kuthekera kwanga kuthamanga mailosi 26.2 nthawi mopepuka kwa zaka pafupifupi 20. Sindinathe mpaka pamene ndinaona kuti zandithera m’pamene ndinaphunzira kukhala woyamikira chifukwa cha masiku abwino, amene tsopano anali ochepekera.

Lero, ndaphunziranso kusangalala m'masiku oyipa mthupi mwanga, zomwe sizovuta. Ndipo ndikufuna kuti mupeze zomwezo. Ngati mwakhumudwitsidwa chifukwa cholephera kuyimilira ndi anzanu ena onse, thokozani chifukwa cha khwangwala wakupha, kulimba mtima kwanu kulowa mchipinda chotentha cha yoga, kapena kupita patsogolo komwe mudapanga pakusinthika kwanu.

Pa January 1, ndinatsegula kope latsopano ndikulemba "3 Things I Did Well Today." Ndidadzipereka kusunga mndandanda wazinthu zitatu zomwe ndimachita bwino tsiku lililonse pachaka, mosasamala kanthu za thanzi langa kapena thanzi langa zomwe ndimayamika ndi zinthu zomwe ndingakondwere nazo. Patha miyezi 11, ndipo mndandandawu ukupitilizabe. Ndikufuna kuti muyambe mndandanda wazopambana za tsiku ndi tsiku. Ndikuganiza kuti mudzawona mwachangu zinthu zonse zodabwitsa zomwe mungachite patsiku. Ndani amasamala kuti simunathamange mamailosi atatu? Mudatenga galu pamaulendo atatu ataliatali m'malo mwake.

Ndili ndi mfundo zosavomerezeka m'moyo kuti ndisamapereke upangiri woyenera. Ndakhala ndikuthamanga kwazaka khumi ndipo ndamaliza ma marathons ochepa, komabe sindingakuuzeni kuthamanga kapena kuthamanga komwe muyenera kuthamanga, kapena kangati kuti mupite kumeneko. Koma chinthu chimodzi chimene ine ndidzalalikire nacho—chinthu chimodzi chimene ine ndiri bwino kukulangizani inu kuti muchite chifukwa ine ndikudziwa chinthu chimodzi kapena ziwiri za icho—ndimo momwe mungakhalire moyo wachisomo. Landirani thanzi lanu labwino ngati mwakhala ndi mwayi wokhala nawo. Ngati mwakhala ndi zopinga zina ndi thupi lanu, ubale wanu, ntchito yanu, chirichonse, yang'anani ndi kukumbatira zopambana zanu zazing'ono m'malo mwake, ndikusintha maganizo anu ku zomwe thupi lanu lingathe kuchita, m'malo momangoganizira zomwe silingathe.

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