Njira 12 Zolekerera Nsanje

Zamkati

• Fotokozerani komwe adachokera
• Nenani nkhawa zanu
• Ovomereza nsonga
• Lankhulani ndi mnzanu wodalirika
• Ikani nsanje yosiyana
• Taganizirani chithunzi chonse
• Yesetsani kuyamikira pazomwe muli nazo
• Yesetsani kulimbana ndi mphindi zakanthawi
• Pumulani pang'ono
• Onani zomwe zimayambitsa
• Kumbukirani kufunika kwanu
• Yesetsani kulingalira
• Ipatseni nthawi
• Lankhulani ndi wothandizira

Timaphatikizapo zinthu zomwe timaganiza kuti ndizothandiza kwa owerenga athu. Ngati mutagula maulalo omwe ali patsamba lino, titha kupeza ndalama zochepa.Nayi njira yathu.

Nsanje ili ndi mbiri yoipa. Si zachilendo kumva anthu akufuna kwabwino akunena zinthu monga, "Usachite nsanje" kapena "Nsanje imawononga maubale." Koma nchiyani chikuchititsa kukhumudwaku?

Ngakhale kuti nthawi zambiri imalumikizidwa ndi maubwenzi apamtima, nsanje imatha kubwera nthawi iliyonse mukakhala ndi nkhawa yotaya chilichonse kapena wina aliyense wofunikira kwa inu. Izi ndizosiyana ndi kaduka, komwe kumafuna kufunafuna chinthu cha wina.

Nsanje ingayambitse mkwiyo, kuipidwa, kapena kukhumudwa. Koma nthawi zambiri imatha kukuwuzani kanthu kapena ziwiri za inu nokha ndi zosowa zanu.

Nayi njira zina zothanirana ndi nsanje ndikuwona zomwe zili muzu wazomwe mukumva.

Fotokozerani komwe adachokera

"Mukapeza nsanje," akutero a Sarah Swenson, LMHC, "dzifunseni chomwe chimayambitsa. Kenako chitanipo kanthu kuti musinthe zomwe simukuzikonda kuti mupeze zomwe mukufuna. "

Kusanthula nsanje yanu kumatha kukupatsani chidziwitso cha komwe amachokera:

• Chibwenzi chatsopano cha mlongo wako chimayambitsa nsanje chifukwa simunakhalepo ndi mwayi wambiri pachibwenzi komanso kuda nkhawa kuti simupeza munthu woyenera.
• Kukwezedwa kwa wogwira naye ntchito kumakupangitsani kukhala ndi nsanje chifukwa mumakhulupirira kuti simuli oyenera pantchito yanu kuti mukwezeke pantchito.
• Mnzanu akayamba kuthera nthawi yochuluka ndi bwenzi latsopano, mumakhala ndi nsanje chifukwa ichi ndiye chinali chizindikiro choyamba chomwe mudazindikira mnzanu wakale atabera.

Kaya nsanje yanu imachokera pakusatetezeka, mantha, kapena ubale wakale, kudziwa zambiri pazomwe zimayambitsa kungakuthandizeni kudziwa momwe mungalimbane nawo.

Mwina mumalankhula momasuka ndi woyang'anira wanu za zomwe mukufuna kukwezedwa pantchito, tsimikizani kuyesa njira ina yoti mukhale pachibwenzi, kapena lankhulani ndi mnzanu zakukhosi kwanu.

Nenani nkhawa zanu

Ngati zochita za mnzanu (kapena zomwe wina akuchita kwa mnzanu) zimayambitsa nsanje, mubweretsereni izi ndi mnzanuyo posachedwa.

Ovomereza nsonga

Yambirani mutu wa nsanje pamene nonse mutha kupatula nthawi kuti mukambirane zopindulitsa. Pomwe zingatheke, yesetsani kupewa kukambirana nkhani yovuta musanagone kapena mukatsala pang'ono kutuluka pakhomo.

Wokondedwa wanu mwina sanazindikire khalidweli, kapena mwina sanazindikire momwe mumamvera. Gwiritsani ntchito mwayiwu kuti mukambirane za malire aliwonse aubwenzi omwe mungafune kuwunikiranso, kapena kambiranani njira zopititsira kuti banja lanu likhale lolimba.

Ngati mumamukhulupirira mnzanu koma mukukayika chifukwa cha zomwe munakumana nazo kale, yesani kupeza njira zingapo zomwe nonse mungathandizire kukonza vutolo.

Ngati mukuchita mantha kutchula nsanje, yesetsani kukumbukira kuti ndizabwinobwino. Wokondedwa wanu atha kukhala ndi nsanje yawo nthawi ina.

Lankhulani ndi mnzanu wodalirika

Nsanje nthawi zina zimatha kukupatsa lingaliro lopotoka pang'ono. Mutha kudabwa ngati kukopana kopanda mawu komwe mumalumbira kuti mwawona kudachitikadi.

Nthawi zina, kuuza ena za nkhawa izi kungapangitse kuti vutoli lisakhale lowopsa ndikuthandizani kuti muwone bwino.

Ikani nsanje yosiyana

Nsanje ikhoza kukhala yovuta, yamphamvu, ndipo mwina simungamve bwino mukamalimbana nayo. Koma m'malo moziyang'ana ngati china cholakwika, yesani kuziona ngati gwero lothandiza.

Nsanje, malinga ndi Swenson, imakuwuzani kuti pali kusiyana pakati pa zomwe muli nazo ndi zomwe mukufuna.

Akuwonjezeranso kuti nsanje yosaletseka imatha kudzidzudzula ndikupanga njira yomwe imakupangitsani kumva kuti ndinu osowa. Koma mutha kuyigwiritsa ntchito pozindikira kuti ndi chidziwitso chothandiza chomwe mungagwiritse ntchito popanga zosowa zanu.

Taganizirani chithunzi chonse

Nsanje nthawi zina zimayamba chifukwa cha chithunzi pang'ono. Mwanjira ina, mutha kukhala mukudziyerekeza nokha ndi zomwe zakwaniritsidwa ndi malingaliro anu pakuwona koyenera kapena kosakwanira kwa wina.

Anthu nthawi zambiri amadzionetsera okha kudziko lapansi, motero sizovuta nthawi zonse kunena zomwe zikuchitikadi m'moyo wa wina kapena ubale wake. Ndiye pali nkhani yonse yapa social media, yomwe imakulitsa lingaliro ili.

Koma simudziwa zenizeni zomwe wina akukumana nazo, makamaka mukangoyang'ana pa TV.

Mnzanu waku koleji yemwe ali ndi zithunzi za Facebook za iye ndi mwamuna wake ali kudambo, akuwoneka opanda nkhawa komanso osangalala? Kwa onse omwe mukudziwa, adakangana mpaka uko ndipo akutuluka thukuta pansi pa zikwangwani zonsezo.

Yesetsani kuyamikira pazomwe muli nazo

Kuthokoza pang'ono kumatha kupita kutali. Sizingathe kuchepetsa kukhumbira kwa nsanje, komanso kuchepetsa nkhawa.

Mwina simungakhale ndi zonse zomwe mukufuna. Ambiri aife sititero. Koma mwina muli ndi osachepera ena za zomwe mukufuna. Mwinanso muli ndi zinthu zina zabwino pamoyo wanu zomwe simumayembekezera.

Izi zitha kuthandiza ngati mukuyang'ana njinga yamtengo wapatali ya mnzanu kapena mukufuna kuti mnzanuyo asamakhale nthawi yayitali ndi abwenzi. Dzikumbutseni za njinga yanu yolimba, yodalirika yomwe imakufikitsani komwe muyenera kupita. Ganizirani zaubwino wokhala ndi bwenzi lomwe limazindikira kufunika kocheza.

Ngakhale kuyamikira zinthu zabwino m'moyo wanu zomwe sizikugwirizana ndi nsanje kungakuthandizeni kuzindikira kuti, ngakhale moyo wanu sungakhale wangwiro (koma moyo wake ndi uti?), Mudakali ndi zinthu zina zabwino zomwe zikukuyenderani.

Yesetsani kulimbana ndi mphindi zakanthawi

Kulimbana ndi nsanje pamene ikubwera sikungakuthandizeni kuthana ndi zomwe zimayambitsa. Koma zingakuthandizeni kuti musakhale ndi nkhawa mpaka mutathana ndi mavutowo.

Kutembenuzira chidwi chanu pa nsanje kungakuthandizeninso kuti musachite momwe mumamvera (ndikupanga china chake chomwe chingawononge ubale kapena ubwenzi).

Pumulani pang'ono

Yesani njirazi kuti musokoneze malingaliro akaduka asanakule kwambiri:

• Lembani zomwe mukumva.
• Yendani pang'ono.
• Dzipatseni malo posiya vutolo.
• Tengani mphindi 10 kuti muchitepo kanthu.

Onani zomwe zimayambitsa

Nsanje yomwe imapitilira ndikuyambitsa mavuto nthawi zina imatha kukhala ndi nkhawa kapena kudzidalira, akufotokoza Vicki Botnick, LMFT. “Kuphunzira kuthana ndi vuto lililonse kungathandize kuchepetsa nsanje.”

Njira imodzi yofikira kudzidalira ndikuphatikizapo kuzindikira zomwe tili nazo, monga chifundo, kulumikizana, kapena kuwona mtima. Izi zimathandiza, malinga ndi Botnick, chifukwa zimakuthandizani kuti muwone ngati mukusunga izi pamoyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku.

Zimakupatsaninso mwayi woti muwone mikhalidwe yanu yabwino ndikuwunikanso zomwe zili zofunika kwa inu. Izi zitha kukulitsa kudzidalira kwanu ndipo zitha kuthandiza kuchepetsa kukhumudwa kudzikweza kapena mpikisano.

Kuda nkhawa kumatha kukhala ndi zizindikilo zingapo zomwe zingakhale zovuta kuzithetsa panokha. Njira zothanirana ndi mavuto zingathandize (pezani maupangiri apa), koma mankhwala atha kukhala njira yabwino.

Botnick akuwonetsanso kuyesa buku lolemba nkhawa monga The Mindful Way Workbook.

Zimagwiritsa ntchito mfundo zothandizidwa ndi malingaliro okuthandizani kuti:

• onjezerani kuvomereza mozungulira nkhawa kuti zisakulepheretseni
• zindikirani malingaliro osafunikira kapena opsinjika kuti muthe kuwatsutsa ndikuwasintha

Kumbukirani kufunika kwanu

Pamene nsanje imakulimbikitsani kudzifananitsa ndi ena, kudzidalira kwanu kumatha kuyamba kukumenyani. Moyo wanu ukhoza kukhala wokhumbirika kwa wina aliyense, pambuyo pa zonse. Koma nsanje imatha kukupangitsani kumva kuti mulibe chilichonse chomwe muli nacho ndichokwanira.

Kafukufuku wofufuza kulumikizana komwe kungakhalepo pakati pa nsanje ndi kudzidalira kunapeza umboni wosonyeza kuti nsanje imatha kuchitika mukakhala pachiwopsezo chodzidalira.

Kulimbana ndi kudzidalira:

• Dzikumbutseni nokha za zinthu zomwe mumachita bwino.
• Yesetsani kudzimvera chisoni (mwanjira ina, dzichitireni momwe mungachitire ndi bwenzi lanu lapamtima).
• Yesetsani kutsimikizika tsiku lililonse kapena kusinthana ndi mnzanu.
• Dzikumbutseni za zinthu zomwe mumakonda mwa mnzanu komanso ubale.
• Pezani nthawi yochitira zinthu zomwe mumakonda.

Yesetsani kulingalira

Njira zamaganizidwe zimakuthandizani kuti muzisamala ndi malingaliro anu ndi momwe akumvera akamabwera popanda kuwaweruza kapena kuwadzudzula. Kuchulukitsa kuzindikira kwanu pakaduka kungakuthandizeni kuzindikira njira zilizonse zomwe zikutsatira, kuphatikiza zinthu zomwe zimachitika musanachite nsanje.

Kulingalira kungakuthandizeninso kukhala omasuka ndi nsanje. Mwachitsanzo, zitha kukuthandizani kuzindikira ndikuvomereza nsanje yanu pazomwe zili - gawo lazomwe mumakumana nazo - ndikusunthira patsogolo.

Kusaweruza nsanje, kapena nokha kuti mukumva, ikhoza kuthandizira kuti isakudetseni.

Ipatseni nthawi

Ngati mwakumana ndi nsanje kale, mwina mukudziwa kale kuti nsanje imatha pakapita nthawi. Zingamveke kuchepa mutatha kuthana ndi malingaliro anu, inde, koma zimatha kuchepetsanso kamodzi zomwe mumachita nsanje zitatha.

Malinga ndi kafukufuku yemwe adawona momwe nsanje idachitikira, anthu nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi nsanje pomwepo kale chinachake chimachitika, osati pambuyo pake.

Nthawi ikamapita, inunso mumakhala ochepa kuti mumve kufunika kodzifanizira nokha kapena momwe zinthu zilili ndi wina. Koma malingaliro abwino omwe muli nawo amakhalabe.

Chifukwa chake, ngakhale mungakhale ndi nsanje pamene tsiku laukwati la bwenzi lanu lapamtima likuyandikira, tsiku lotsatira laukwati mungakhale opanda nsanje komanso osangalala kwambiri ndi bwenzi lanu.

Lankhulani ndi wothandizira

Ngati mukuvutika kuthana ndi nsanje nokha, kuyankhula ndi wothandizira kungakuthandizeni.

Sizovuta nthawi zonse kulankhula za nsanje. Mungamve kukhala omasuka kwambiri kugawana malingaliro awa ndi munthu amene simukumudziwa. Koma wochiritsa wabwino amakumana nanu mokoma mtima komanso mwachifundo.

Kuphatikiza apo, amadziwa bwino kuposa wina aliyense kuti nsanje ndichikhalidwe chomwe aliyense amakhala nacho nthawi ina.

Botnick amagawana zizindikilo zingapo zomwe zikusonyeza kuti kuyankhula ndi wothandizira kungakhale kothandiza:

• Nsanje imabweretsa malingaliro okhwima kapena okhazikika.
• Mukuwona machitidwe okakamiza.
• Malingaliro ansanje amakhala osalamulirika kapena olowerera.
• Mumakhala ndi malingaliro achiwawa kapena zolimbikitsa.
• Nsanje imayambitsa machitidwe ovuta, monga kutsatira mnzanu kapena kuwayang'anira pafupipafupi.
• Nsanje imakhudza moyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku, imakulepheretsani kuchita zinthu zomwe mukufuna kuchita, kapena imabweretsa mavuto ena.

"Ngati nthawi zonse mumafunikira kuyang'ana pazakudya zanu zapa media, foni ya mnzanu, kapena zomwe anthu omwe ali pamzere ku Starbucks amavala, ndiye kuti simungakhalenso m'moyo wanu, ndipo ili ndi vuto," akumaliza Botnick.

Nsanje ingakuthandizeni kuyang'ana kwa omwe (ndi omwe) mumawakonda. Sichiyenera kuyambitsa mavuto kwa inu kapena maubwenzi anu. Itha kuthandizanso kuti maubwenzi akhale olimba nthawi zina. Zonse zimadalira momwe mumagwiritsira ntchito.