Momwe Mungalankhulire Zodzipha ndi Anthu Omwe Mumawakonda

Zamkati

• Sikuti mawu aliwonse atha kubwereranso mosavuta - kapena munthawi yake
• Osalongosola kudzipha ngati
  
• Simungathe kulonjeza aliyense kuti zikhala bwino
• M'malo mobwereza zomwe wina wanena, choyamba dzifunseni
  
• Lolani chikhumbo chokhala malo otetezeka kwa okondedwa anu akutsogolereni mawu anu
• Ziwerengero zaumoyo
  
• Chikumbutso: Matenda amisala siopambana

Momwe mungalumikizane ndi wina padziko lapansi.

Ngati inu kapena munthu wina amene mumamudziwa akuganiza zodzipha, thandizo lilipo. Fikirani ku National Suicide Prevention Lifeline pa 800-273-8255.

Zikafika pamavuto, mumadziwa bwanji zoyenera kunena osakhumudwitsa aliyense? Anthu ambiri amaphunzira mwa kubwereza mawu omwe awona ena akugwiritsa ntchito. Zomwe timawona munyuzi, zomwe zimafalikira kwa mamiliyoni, zingawoneke ngati zabwino kugwiritsa ntchito tsiku lililonse.

Koma pazinthu monga kumenya kapena kudzipha, zitha kutumiza uthenga kwa anzathu kuti sitili nawo.

“Chifukwa chiyani sindinali mtundu wa munthu, kapena bwanji sindinkawonedwa ngati mtundu wa anthu, omwe azimayiwa amakhala omasuka kumuuza zakukhosi? Ndikuwona ngati kulephera kwathu. ”

Pamene Anthony Bourdain adanena izi, zinali za #MeToo ndi azimayi m'moyo wake: Chifukwa chiyani sanamumvere bwino? Kutenga kwake kunali kopambana. Sanaloze zala akazi kapena kachitidwe.

M'malo mwake, adazindikira kuti lingaliro lawo loti akhale chete linali ndemanga yokhudza mikhalidwe yake. Kapenanso, makamaka, chikwangwani choti momwe amadzichitira adadziwitsa azimayi kuti sanali otetezeka kapena wodalirika.

Ndalingalira zambiri za kuwunika kwake kuyambira pomwe adanena komanso popeza wadutsa. Zinandipangitsa kulingalira mozama za momwe mawu ali magalasi, momwe amawonetsera malingaliro a wokamba nkhani, ndi omwe ndingawauze zakukhosi.

Ambiri, kuphatikiza makolo anga ndi anzanga omwe ndawadziwa zaka 10 kuphatikiza kuphatikiza, samapanga mndandanda.

"Ndachita chiyani [,] ndadziwonetsera bwanji kuti ndisamadzidalire, kapena bwanji sindinali munthu amene anthu angawone ngati anzanga pano? Chifukwa chake ndidayamba kuyang'ana izi. ” - Anthony Bourdain

Zinthu zikandidera, sindidzakumbukira kuseka komwe adabweretsa. Amangomvera malingaliro awo pakudzipha: "Ndizodzikonda kwambiri" kapena "Ngati ndiwe wopusa mokwanira kuyamba kumwa mankhwala [a Big Pharma], ndisiya kukhala bwenzi lako." Okumbukira kumabwereza nthawi iliyonse akawona ndi "Zotani, muli bwanji?"

Nthawi zina ndimanama, nthawi zina ndimanena zowona, koma sindinena zowona zonse. Nthawi zambiri, sindimayankha mpaka nthawi yachisoniyo ithe.

Mawu ali ndi tanthauzo kupitirira tanthauzo lake. Zili ndi mbiriyakale, ndipo pogwiritsa ntchito mobwerezabwereza m'miyoyo yathu ya tsiku ndi tsiku, amakhala mapangano ochezera, owonetsera malingaliro athu ndi malamulo amkati omwe timayembekezera kutsatira.

Sizosiyana kwambiri ndi "lamulo la woperekera zakudya": chikhulupiliro chakuti umunthu umaululidwa ndi momwe munthu amathandizira antchito kapena ogwira ntchito. Lamuloli silosiyana kwenikweni pankhani yakudzipha komanso kukhumudwa.

Sikuti mawu aliwonse atha kubwereranso mosavuta - kapena munthawi yake

Mawu ena amakhala ozama kwambiri munjira zoyipa kotero kuti njira yokhayo yopewera tanthauzo lake ndi kusazigwiritsa ntchito. Chimodzi mwamasinthidwe ophweka omwe tingapange ndikupewa kugwiritsa ntchito ziganizo. Kupatula kupereka mawu anu achitetezo, palibe chifukwa chokhala ndi lingaliro lakudzipha kwa wina. Ndipo palibe chifukwa chosinthira kapena kufotokozera, makamaka ngati nkhani.

Monga momwe katswiri wofuna kudzipha Samuel Wallace alembera, “Kudzipha konse sikonyansa kapena ayi; wamisala kapena ayi; kudzikonda kapena ayi; zomveka kapena ayi; zifukwa zomveka kapena ayi. ”

Osalongosola kudzipha ngati

• kudzikonda
• wopusa
• wamantha kapena ofooka
• chisankho
• tchimo (kapena kuti munthuyo akupita ku gehena)

Izi zimachokera pamfundo yonena kuti kudzipha ndi zotsatira zake, osati kusankha. Chifukwa chake, madokotala ambiri ofuna kudzipha amavomereza kuti kudzipha si chisankho kapena kuchita zinthu mwaufulu.

KODI MATENDA A Mumtima amachotsa chifuniro chaulere?

M'kope lachinayi la Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disways, matenda amisala ali ndi gawo limodzi "lotaya ufulu." M'magazini yaposachedwa kwambiri, "kutaya ufulu" kwasinthidwa kukhala chilema, kapena "kuwonongeka pamtundu umodzi kapena zingapo zofunikira pakugwira ntchito." Akuti izi zikuphatikiza "kutaya kamodzi kapena zingapo za ufulu." M'nkhani yake yakuti "," a Gerben Meynen akunena kuti china chake chokhala ndi vuto lamisala ndikuti kuthekera kwa munthu kusankha njira zina kumachotsedwa.

M'nkhani yake yovuta ya New York Post, a Bridget Phetasy adalemba zakukula mnyumba yomwe anthu ambiri amafuna kudzipha. Adalemba, "Ndimakonda kukhala ndi munthu yemwe amamuwopseza kuti adzipha adachita zoposa zonse zomwe zidawoneka ngati njira yabwino."

Kwa iwo omwe ali ndi malingaliro ofuna kudzipha, tiyenera kuzindikira kuti kudzipha kumabwera ngati njira yomaliza komanso yokhayo. Ndi bodza lamkati. Koma mukakhala kuti mukumva kuwawa kwakathupi komanso kwakuthupi, zikafika panjira ndipo kuzungulira kulikonse kumawoneka ngati koyipitsitsa, kupumula kwa izo - ngakhale zitakhala bwanji - kumawoneka ngati kuthawa.

“Momwe ndidafunira kukhala mfulu; wopanda thupi langa, zowawa zanga, zowawa zanga. Meme yopusayo inali kunong'oneza zokoma ku gawo laubongo wanga zomwe zimandiuza kuti yankho lokhalo pamavuto anga - inali imfa. Osati yankho lokhalo - yankho labwino kwambiri. Unali bodza, koma panthawiyo, ndinkakhulupirira. ” - Bridget Phetasy, wa New York Post

Simungathe kulonjeza aliyense kuti zikhala bwino

Kudzipha sikusankha. Matenda okhumudwa samamugunda munthu kamodzi ndikunyamuka pomwe mikhalidwe kapena malo asintha. Zokopa za kuthawa kudzera muimfa sizimangopita chifukwa choti wina alemera kapena akwaniritsa zolinga za moyo wonse.

Ngati mukufuna kuuza munthu wina kuti zikhala bwino, ganizirani ngati mukupanga lonjezo lomwe simungakwaniritse. Kodi mukukhala m'maganizo mwawo? Kodi mutha kuwona zamtsogolo ndikuwachotsera zowawa zisanachitike?

Zowawa zomwe zimabwera sizimadziwika. Momwemonso ndipomwe adzakhala moyo masabata awiri, mwezi, kapena zaka zitatu panjira. Kuuza wina kuti apeza bwino kumatha kuwapangitsa kufananiza gawo limodzi ndi linanso. Ngati palibe chomwe chimawonjezera nthawi yowonjezera, chimatha kubweretsa malingaliro ngati, "Sichikhala bwino."

Koma ngakhale ena angakhulupirire kuti imfa mwa iyo yokha si yabwinoko, mauthenga omwe amagawana, makamaka okhudza otchuka, akunena mosiyana. Monga adanenera Phetasy, Robin Williams atamwalira, Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences idalemba "Aladdin" meme kuti, "Genie, ndiwe mfulu."

Izi zimatumiza mauthenga osakanikirana.

Imfa ngati ufulu itha kukhala yokhozaKutengera ndi zomwe zatchulidwazo, "ufulu" ukhoza kuwonedwa ngati wokhoza komanso wolimbikitsa kwa iwo omwe ali olumala. Pankhani ya katswiri wodziwika bwino wasayansi Stephen Hawking, ambiri adatumiza mawu kuti iye alibe thupi. Izi zimalimbikitsa lingaliro loti kukhala wolumala ndi thupi "lotsekedwa".

Pankhani yodzipha, imalimbikitsa uthenga kuti palibe kothawira koma imfa. Mukamagula chilankhulochi ndikuchigwiritsa ntchito, zimapitilira kuti imfa ndiyo yankho labwino kwambiri.

Ngakhale simukumvetsetsa mitundu yonse yazolankhula, pali mafunso omwe mungadzifunse kuti mudzisunge.

M'malo mobwereza zomwe wina wanena, choyamba dzifunseni

• Ndi lingaliro lanji "labwino" lomwe ndikulimbikitsa?
• Kodi zingakhudze ngati anzanga abwera kudzandithandiza?
• Zimandipangitsa kumva bwanji ngati sakundikhulupirira kuti ndiwathandiza?

Lolani chikhumbo chokhala malo otetezeka kwa okondedwa anu akutsogolereni mawu anu

Kudzipha ndiko chifukwa chachiwiri chomwe chimayambitsa imfa mwa anthu azaka 10 mpaka 34. Yakula kwambiri kuposa kuyambira 1999.

Ndipo ana akukumana ndi mavuto azaumoyo:

Ziwerengero zaumoyo

• Ana 17.1 miliyoni ochepera zaka 18 ali ndi matenda amisala
• Achinyamata 60 pa 100 aliwonse ali ndi nkhawa
• 9,000 (kuyerekezera) kuchepa kwa akatswiri azamisala pasukulu

Ndipo izi zipitilira kukula, mopitilira muyeso uwu, chifukwa palibe lonjezo kuti zitha kukhala bwino. Palibe amene anganene zaumoyo ukupita kuti. Therapy ndi yovuta kufikirika komanso yosatheka kwa anthu aku America okwana 5.3 miliyoni. Zingapitilize kutero ngati tisunge zokambirana nthawi zonse.

Pakadali pano, zomwe tingachite ndikuchepetsa mtolo wa omwe timawakonda momwe tingathere. Titha kusintha momwe timalankhulira zaumoyo wamaganizidwe ndi omwe akukhudzidwa nawo. Ngakhale sitikudziwa wina yemwe wakhudzidwa ndikudzipha, titha kukumbukira mawu omwe timagwiritsa ntchito.

Simuyenera kukhala ndi nkhawa kuti musonyeze kukoma mtima, komanso simukuyenera kutayika.

Inu mwina simusowa kuti munene kalikonse. Kufunitsitsa kumvera nkhani ndi mavuto a wina ndi mnzake ndikofunikira kulumikizana kwaumunthu.

“Laugher si mankhwala athu. Nkhani ndi mankhwala athu. Kuseka ndi uchi chabe womwe umakometsera mankhwala owawa. ” - Hannah Gadsby, "Nanette"

Chifundo chomwe timanyamula kwa anthu omwe sitimadziwa chimatumiza uthenga wokulirapo kwa anthu omwe mumawakonda, munthu yemwe mwina simukudziwa kuti akuvutika.

Chikumbutso: Matenda amisala siopambana

Kukhala wokhoza kudzuka tsiku lililonse pomwe dziko lomwe lili mkati mwanu limagwa sikumakhala ngati mphamvu nthawi zonse. Ndiko kulimbana komwe kumavuta nthawi ndi nthawi thupi likamakalamba ndipo timakhala ndi mphamvu zochepa pa thanzi lathu.

Nthawi zina timatopa kwambiri kunyamula tokha, ndipo timafunika kudziwa kuti zili bwino. Sitiyenera kukhala "pa" 100 peresenti ya nthawiyo.

Koma pamene munthu wotchuka, kapena wina wolemekezedwa, afa mwa kudzipha, zingakhale zovuta kuti wina amene akudwala matenda azikumbukira. Atha kukhala opanda kuthekera kothana ndi kukayikira kwamkati ndi ziwanda.

Sichinthu chomwe anthu omwe mumawakonda ayenera kuchita okha. Kuwona ngati akufunikira thandizo sikutengera chisamaliro mwanjira iliyonse.

Monga nthabwala waku Australia a Hannah Gadsby adayika bwino kwambiri mu "Nanette" wake waposachedwa wa Netflix, "Kodi mukudziwa chifukwa chomwe tili ndi 'Mpendadzuwa'? Sikuti Vincent van Gogh anavutika [ndi matenda amisala]. Ndi chifukwa chakuti Vincent van Gogh anali ndi mchimwene wake amene amamukonda. Kupyolera mu zowawa zonse, anali ndi vuto, wolumikizana ndi dziko lapansi. ”

Khalani wolumikizana ndi wina padziko lapansi.

Tsiku lina wina sadzatumizira mameseji. Palibe vuto kukafika pakhomo pawo ndikulowa.

Kupanda kutero, tidzataya zambiri mwakachetechete ndikukhala chete.

Takulandilani ku "Momwe Mungakhalire Anthu," mndandanda wazomvera ena chisoni komanso momwe mungaikire anthu patsogolo. Kusiyana sikuyenera kukhala ndodo, ngakhale anthu atipangira chiyani. Bwerani mudzaphunzire za mphamvu ya mawu ndikukondwerera zokumana nazo za anthu, mosasamala zaka zawo, mtundu wawo, jenda, kapena mkhalidwe wawo. Tiyeni tikweze anzathu kudzera mu ulemu.