Kugonana kwa Madokotala Amuna Kukuchitikabe - Ndipo Akuyenera Kuyimitsa

Zamkati

• Koma pazaka zingapo zapitazi, ndakumanapo ndi ma dotolo achimuna omwe adandisiya ndikumva kuti ndikuphwanyidwa.
• Monga munthu amene adachitidwapo zachipongwe, zochitika izi zidamveka ngati masewera obisika.
• Ndipo zikuwoneka kuti, sindine ndekha amene ndakumanapo ndi zotere.
• Kodi timasewera limodzi kuti tipeze zomwe tikufuna? Kapena kodi timakhala pachiwopsezo chakuwoneka ngati 'ovuta' ndikuwopseza thanzi lathu?
• Ngakhale ndizosavuta (komanso zomveka) kumva kuti ndilibe mphamvu munthawi izi, ndayamba kubwerera mmbuyo.
• Ndili wokondwa kwa madotolo amphongo omwe ndakhala nawo omwe amasunga bala ndikukhala osamalira bwino, ndikunditsimikizira kuti ndingathe ndipo ndiyenera kudzimva ngati wodwala.

Kodi dokotala wachikazi akanatha nthabwala zakuti amatha kuchita zinthu pamaso panga popanda namwino woyang'anira?

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Posachedwa, ndayesedwa kuti ndilemberetu madotolo achimuna.

Sindinatero.

Sikuti sindidzawona madotolo achimuna, chifukwa ndidzatero. Ndimawawonabe chifukwa ndimakumbukira ena mwa madotolo achimuna omwe andithandiza kwambiri paulendo wanga wonse wokhudza zaumoyo.

Ndimaganizira za gastroenterologist wanga, yemwe nthawi zonse amandiyandikira moyenera, komanso amene amakhala okoma mtima komanso aulemu pocheza ndi ine.

Ndimaganiziranso za dermatologist wanga, yemwe sanakhalepo kanthu koma waluso pomwe amandipatsa kafukufuku wanthawi zonse pakhungu - {textend} njira zonse zathupi zomwe mwachilengedwe zimayenderana.

Madotolo akhala abwino.

Koma pazaka zingapo zapitazi, ndakumanapo ndi ma dotolo achimuna omwe adandisiya ndikumva kuti ndikuphwanyidwa.

Nthawi zambiri, ndakumanapo ndi madotolo achimuna omwe amaganiza kuti ndibwino kupereka ndemanga, osagonana - {textend} mtundu wankhanizo womwe umamveka ngati wotsimikizira mphamvu, kapena kutanthauza kukhazika mtima pansi komwe sikuli kwenikweni nawo.

Izi zikuphatikizanso wamwamuna wa OB-GYN, yemwe, atawunika mbiri yanga, adati: "Inde, uyenera kuti unali wamisala komanso wopenga, ha?"

Ndinadabwa. Ndinalibe mawu pakadali pano - {textend} koma ayi, sindinakhale wolusa komanso wamisala zaka 18. Ndinachitidwapo zachipongwe.

Ndinangokhala chete mpaka ndikafika kunyumba, ndinalowa pabedi langa, ndikudabwa kuti ndikulira chiyani.

Mtundu wotere wa "micro-misogyny" ndiofala kwambiri m'maofesi ena achimuna, pomwe odwala wodwala amatha kutisiya tili omasuka komanso opanda mphamvu.

Panalinso ndemanga yochokera kwa wophunzitsayo komanso wophunzira zamankhwala - {textend} amuna onse - {textend} kuofesi yanga ya dermatologist, yemwe adati kwa ine: "Ndipita kukamupatsa namwino woyang'anira kuti awonetsetse kuti timachita zinthu bwino , "Ngati kuti panali mwayi woti" sangadzisunge "ndi ine.

Ndinali nditakhala maliseche patsogolo pawo, kupatula chovala chochepa chapa pepala chophimba thupi langa. Sindikumva kuti ndine wotetezeka m'mbuyomu, koma sindinadzimve wotetezeka tsopano.

Kodi mayi wamkazi akanachita nthabwala iye kutha kuchita zinthu pamaso panga popanda namwino woyang'anira? Sindingachitire mwina koma kukhulupirira kuti mwayiwo ndi wochepa kwambiri.

Monga munthu amene adachitidwapo zachipongwe, zochitika izi zidamveka ngati masewera obisika.

Chifukwa chiyani wophunzirayo komanso wophunzira zamankhwala adawona kuti akufunika kuseka ndi zondilipira zanga? Kuti adzipange kukhala omasuka ndi mfundo yakuti iwo akhoza Gwiritsani ntchito mwayi wanga ngati sikunayenera kukhala ndi namwino mchipinda nthawi imeneyo?

Sindinadziwe cholinga chawo, koma nditha kugawana kuti nthabwalayo silinafike. Osati za ine, osachepera.

Nthawi zonse ndimakhala wocheperako pa 4'11 ”, ndipo ndakhala mkazi wolankhula mofewa. Ndine wazaka 28 ndipo ndimawonekabe bwino. Zonsezi zikutanthauza, ndikungoganiza kuti amandiwona ngati munthu amene anganene izi.

Wina yemwe samanena chilichonse. Winawake yemwe angawalole kuti iziyenda.

Popeza ndidakhala ndikugwiriridwa komwe kudakalipo m'mbuyomu, ndemanga izi ndizokongola kwambiri. Adyambitsanso zokumbutsa zakale za nthawi yomwe thupi langa lidachotsedwa popanda chilolezo changa.

Monga wodwala, ambiri aife timamva kale kuti sitingathe kuchita chilichonse komanso kutetezedwa. Ndiye ndichifukwa chiyani "banter" wosankhayi ndiwachikhalidwe pomwe zimangopangidwa kuti azipangitsa azimayi kukhala opanda mphamvu?

Chowonadi nchakuti, sindikufuna kuwonedwa ngati wokonda kwambiri zinthu, koma chowonadi ndichakuti: Ndemanga izi ndizosayenera ndipo siziyenera kulekerera.

Ndipo zikuwoneka kuti, sindine ndekha amene ndakumanapo ndi zotere.

Angie Ebba andiuza nkhani yake: "Tili patebulo lobadwira, nditangodutsa kumene kuntchito ndikupereka mwana wa preemie, wamwamuna wanga wamwamuna OB-GYN, yemwe anali akukoka komwe ndidang'ambika, adayang'ana kenako-mwamuna nati, 'Mukufuna kuti ndiyike mameseji amwamuna?' ndipo ndinaseka. ”

Amandiuza kuti amuna awo samadziwa zomwe adokotala amalankhula, koma kuti adadziwa.

Mwachiwonekere, anali kuseka za kuyika suture yowonjezerapo kuti malo ake azimayi azikhala ocheperako, motero kuti azimusangalatsa kwambiri mwamuna panthawi yogonana.

Iye akuti, "Ndikadakhala kuti ndatopa pang'ono (ndipo mukudziwa, osati pakati pakupanga sutures) ndikutsimikiza ndikadamumenya mutu."

Mkazi wina, Jay Summer, akugawana zomwezo ndi ine, ngakhale izi zidamuchitikira ali ndi zaka 19.

Jay anati: “Poyamba ndinkacheza nawo nthawi zonse kufikira pamene ndinapempha kulera.

"Ndikukumbukira kuti adachita mantha ndipo mawu ake anali oweruza pomwe adafunsa, 'Kodi ndinu wokwatiwa?' ngati kuti adadzidzimuka kwathunthu munthu wosakwatira angafune kulera. Ndidati ayi ndipo adandifunsa kuti ndili ndi zaka zingati ndikupuma, monga [kukhala wazaka 19 ndikufuna njira yolera] ndichinthu chonyansa kwambiri. ”

Nthawi izi za 'micro-misogyny' zimaika amayi pachiwonetsero chosatheka.

Kodi timasewera limodzi kuti tipeze zomwe tikufuna? Kapena kodi timakhala pachiwopsezo chakuwoneka ngati 'ovuta' ndikuwopseza thanzi lathu?

Nthawi zonse sitikhala ndi nthawi yolekeranso ntchito, kapena zapamwamba zotuluka muofesi ya dokotala ndikupeza wina - {textend} dotolo wina mu netiweki yathu, munjira yathu ya inshuwaransi, mwezi womwewo womwe titha tikusowa mayankho amafunso azachipatala okhudza matupi athu.

Tilibe mwayi wotuluka chifukwa zomwe tikufuna (zotsatira zathu zoyesa, mayankho a mafunso athu, mankhwala) amapezeka pamwamba pamitu yathu, ndipo timayenera kusewera bwino kuti tipeze.

Zimakhala zopulumuka mwanjira ina: Ngati ndingathe kupyola izi, ngati sindinena chilichonse, mwina nditha kupeza mayankho omwe ndikufunika ndikupitiliza za tsiku langa.

Mwa izi, madokotala achimuna ali ndi mphamvu. Amatha kunena zomwe akufuna, ndipo mwina, pali zochepa zomwe zingachitike kuti musinthe izi ngati mukufuna zosowa zanu.

Ndi njira yolepheretsa palibe mkazi amene akuyenera kuyenda kuti afunefune thanzi lake.

Ngakhale ndizosavuta (komanso zomveka) kumva kuti ndilibe mphamvu munthawi izi, ndayamba kubwerera mmbuyo.

Pankhani ya OB-GYN wamwamuna wanga, ndidamuuza ku dipatimenti yanga yazaumoyo yemwe adanditsatira ndikufufuza nkhaniyi.

Ponena za wokhalamo, ndidatumiza imelo kwa dermatologist kuti afotokoze momwe zinthu ziliri ndikuwonetsa kuti, chifukwa amaphunzitsidwa komanso amaphunzirira, wina amamuphunzitsa zochulukirapo panjira yogona pabedi komanso ubale wabwino pakati pa odwala.

Poyankha, adotolo adandiimbira foni kuti apepese ndikundidziwitsa kuti adalankhula ndi nzika za zomwe zachitikazo ndipo zikuchitidwa mozama.

Sicholinga changa changwiro kuwalanga kapena kuwalanga. Koma izo ndi Cholinga changa chophunzitsira ndikuwongolera, ndikuloleza wophunzitsayo kapena wophunzitsayo adziwe pomwe china chake chosayenera chachitika.

Ndipo kumapeto kwa tsiku, zimapindulitsa aliyense.

Zitha kuthandizira kuwonetsetsa kuti madotolo amapewa zolakwika mtsogolo, odwala omwe atayika, kapena njira zowopsa. Ndipo mwanjira ina yaying'ono, ndimadzimva kuti ndili ndi mphamvu podziwa kuti mayankho okhumudwitsawa (mwachiyembekezo) sangapitirire kapena kupitiliza kuvulaza azimayi ena momwe amandipwetekera ine.

Ngakhale sizimakhala zokwanira nthawi zonse, izi ndi zomwe ndikuchita: kuyankhula, kusintha madotolo, ndi kupereka madandaulo pomwe "micro-misogyny" ichitika.

Ndili wokondwa kwa madotolo amphongo omwe ndakhala nawo omwe amasunga bala ndikukhala osamalira bwino, ndikunditsimikizira kuti ndingathe ndipo ndiyenera kudzimva ngati wodwala.

Ndipo ngati dotolo wamwamuna awoloka mzere tsopano, ndakhala ndikuwatsimikizira kuti adzawawerengera iwo momwe ndingathere.

Ndimawasunga kwambiri chifukwa ndimakhulupirira kuti odwala onse - {textend} makamaka azimayi ndi omwe adapulumuka pa nkhanza zogonana - {textend} amayenera chisamaliro chabwino koposa.

Annalize Mabe ndi wolemba komanso wophunzitsa wochokera ku Tampa, Florida. Pakalipano amaphunzitsa ku University of South Florida.