Njira 5-Iyi Ikuthandizirani Kusintha Maganizo Opanda Ntchito

Zamkati

• Kodi Njira ya Shift Stirrer ndi Chiyani Kwenikweni?
• Momwe Njirayo Inapangidwira
• Zomwe Zimapangitsa Kukhala Wapadera
• Zomwe Othandizira Amaganiza Zokhudza Shift Olimbikitsa Njira
• Onaninso za

Mukuyang'ana kukumba mudziko lanu lamalingaliro pang'ono mu 2021? Anthu ambiri (makamaka omwe sanapite kuchipatala) zimawavuta kupeza zomwe akumva ndikuzindikira komwe zinthu zina zikuchokera. Tinamarie Clark - chitsanzo, amayi, ndipo tsopano wolemba - akufuna kusintha izo.

Clark adapanga The Shift Stirrer Method ngati njira yolumikizira zovuta ndikuchepetsa zomwe zimayambitsa, ndipo atazigwiritsa ntchito kwa zaka makumi awiri, adasandutsa buku logawira anthu ambiri.

Kodi Njira ya Shift Stirrer ndi Chiyani Kwenikweni?

Shift Stirrer Method imagwiritsa ntchito njira zisanu zoganizira za Clark "kusintha malingaliro olakwika ndikuchepetsa zikhulupiliro kukhala zolimbikitsa kwambiri." Cholinga chonse ndikulimbikitsa amayi kuti azilumikizana mozama kwa iwo eni ndi ena, akutero Clark.

Njirayi ikupezeka kuti ikugulitsidwa m'mabuku ogwirira ntchito (kaya pa digito kapena mwakuthupi) - ndipo yagawika m'magawo asanu ndi malangizo ochezera. Nayi kuwonongeka kwakanthawi, pang'ono ndi pang'ono kwa maluso:

• Muziganiza: Zindikirani kuti pali chipwirikiti mkati mwanu ndikudzidziwitsa nokha mozungulira. Dziwani zomwe mukumva ndikuzipereka kwa mawu (kukwiya, kukwiya, kuda nkhawa, manyazi, kukwiyitsidwa, kusaleza mtima, tcheru, kudzitchinjiriza, etc.).
• Khala: Khalani ndi zomwe mukumva ndikuwona zomwe zikubwera kwa inu. Pangani malo oti mukhale. Dzipatseni nthawi kuti musachite chilichonse. Khalani omasuka ndikumverera kovuta.
• Sefa: Ganizirani zomwe zikuchitika m'maganizo ndi m'thupi lanu, komanso malingaliro omwe mukukhala nawo pa zomwe zinachitika kapena momwe mukumvera. Bweretsani malingaliro opindulitsa patsogolo ndikusiya mphamvu zoyipa. Apa ndi pamene mutenga umwini wonse wa zosokoneza zomwe mudabweretsa ku nkhaniyi. (Ganizirani: kusokoneza mwachidziwitso, nkhani zabodza, malingaliro opotoka - fyuluta, kukondera, kapena katundu amene mukubweretsa kuzochitikazo.)
• Gawani: Gawani nkhani yanu yosangalatsa komanso yosefera pofotokoza nkhani moona mtima. Kodi chinavumbulutsidwa chiyani mu sefa? Clark amakulimbikitsani kuti musankhe munthu amene mumamukhulupirira mukamagawana.
• Kuloza: Khazikitsani kulumikizana kovomerezeka. Mukamauza ena chowonadi chanu, mumatsegula zipata zosinthana. Yang'anirani zomwe mwaphunzira munjira iyi. Kondwerani zomwe mwachita ndikuyamikira ntchito yomwe munachita.

Momwe Njirayo Inapangidwira

Clark adzakhala munthu woyamba kukuwuzani kuti siwothandizira - koma wapeza njira yomwe imamugwirira ntchito, ndipo akufuna kugawana ndi ena. Zomwe angakhale opanda zidziwitso zomwe amapanga ndi zochitika pamoyo, chilakolako, chifundo, ndi mphamvu zapadera (zomwe, TBH, mukhoza kumva nthawi yomweyo pocheza naye). Ngati mudakhalapo ndi m'modzi ndi mnzanu, mlongo, kapena mlangizi yemwe ali ndi mphamvu ya "mzimu wakale" - wina amene amakusiyani inu kumverera okondedwa ndi kupatsidwa mphamvu - ndi momwe zimakhalira kulumikizana ndi Clark. Ali ngati bwenzi limene waona sh*t, wagonjetsa kwambiri, ndipo akukupatsirani chipiriro.

Kukulira m'nyumba ya Gawo 8 ku Philadelphia m'banja losowa ndalama, Clark akufotokoza za kuleredwa kovutirapo komwe adayenera "kudzipangira zida" kuti apulumuke. Chimodzi mwa njirayi ndikuphunzira "kusiya lupanga ndikuvula zida zankhondo," akutero.

Pamene Clark anayamba ntchito yake yachitsanzo, anali ndi mphindi yomwe inayambitsa ndondomekoyi; anachotsedwa ntchito atasemphana maganizo ndi mtsikana wina wokonda kutsanzira ndipo anazindikira kuti afunika kudziwa chimene chimamuchititsa kuti asiye kuzizira mosavuta. Akuti amayi ake adamulimbikitsa kuyang'ana mkati, ndipo tinthu tating'onoting'ono ta njirayi tidayamba kunyezimira. Pochita mtundu wake wosangalatsa, kukhala, kusefa, kugawana, ndi kusintha, adasintha. Atakula, anazindikira kuti ali ndi chinthu champhamvu chimene akanatha kugawana ndi ena, ndipo atagwira ntchito ndi mphunzitsi zaka zingapo zapitazi, anaganiza kuti sakufuna kuzibisa. Chifukwa chake, malingaliro abukhuli adabadwa.

Zomwe Zimapangitsa Kukhala Wapadera

Ndisanayambe kucheza ndi Clark, gulu lake linandipatsa mwayi wopeza buku la Shift Stirrer Method. Ndipo kunena zowona kwathunthu, sindinkafuna kuchita. Osati kuti sindinasangalale ndi kulemba, kufufuza maganizo, kapena kufufuza njira yatsopano ya umoyo wamaganizo, koma umunthu wanga ndi ubongo zinakana lingaliro ili. Pali kutsindika mu njira iyi pa "kukhala ndi zoipa zanu," ndikuyankha pazomwe mungakhale mukuzitsatira. Muyenera kukumba mu zinthu zomwe sizimamveka bwino kwambiri, ndipo kukana kwanga kosasangalatsa kumeneku kumawonetsedwa mozengereza kwambiri.

Koma ndiye gawo lamatsenga pochita ntchitoyi - ndipo, malinga ndi Clark, ndichinthu chodabwitsa kwambiri. "Kulola kuti mukhale pansi ndi malingaliro osawoneka bwino ndikulimba mtima," akutero. "Iyi si ntchito yosavuta." (Zokhudzana: Chifukwa Chake Mwathupi Mumamva Ngati Shit Pambuyo pa Chithandizo, Kufotokozedwa Ndi Ubwino Waumoyo Waubongo)

Clark akuwonetsa lingaliro lakuchotsa zida zankhondo ndi vignette ya Samurai panthawi ya "sit" ya njirayo. "Asilikali a Samurai amaphunzitsidwa kuti asakhale ogonjera," akutero. "Koma pa tiyi ndi atsogoleri a dera lawo, amakhala pamalo otchedwa seiza. Mwanjira imeneyi, samurai sangafulumire kusolola lupanga lawo; akukhala m'malo odzipereka, popanda chitetezo."

Kukhala mukuyambitsa, kupsa mtima, kapena kukhumudwa popanda kuchitapo kanthu ndicho cholinga chake ndi gawo ili la njira. "Ndikukhazikitsa lupangalo pansi," akufotokoza. "Ndimadziwa momwe ['lupanga'] lingathe kuwonongera, komanso kuti kudzikuza kwanga kungapite patali poyesa kunditeteza - koma ndinali wotopa ndi kuyeretsa [zotsatira zake] kukwapula lupanga mofulumira kwambiri nthawi zonse."

Ngati kuyambiranso kwamaganizidwe ndi chinthu chomwe mumalimbana nacho kapena ngati mumapezeka mobwerezabwereza, njira iyi njirayi ingakhale yothandiza kwambiri. "Timatenga nkhani zakale, ndipo timazisindikiza ndikunamatira; timazisintha momwe timakhalira komanso ubale wathu," akutero Clark.

Mwachitsanzo, adapezeka mumachitidwe mobwerezabwereza ndi mnzake yemwe amamutcha "No-Show Chlo." Anafotokoza bwenzi lake (yemwe amamukonda) kukhala wofooka komanso wosayika nthawi kapena khama kuti amuwone. Pambuyo pake, adazindikira kuti sanakwiye ndi Chloe - anali atatulutsa chisangalalo chake, ndipo anali ndi chikhulupiriro chochepa kuti ngati mnzakeyo sanabwere, zikutanthauza kuti samamukonda. (Zogwirizana: Zizindikiro Kuti Mumacheza Ndi Poizoni)

Atangochita ntchito yokhala mu malingaliro ake, akufunsa chifukwa chake amamva chonchi, "adamasula [Chloe] pa ntchito yake kuti akhale chinthu chinachake, ndiyeno anamupangitsa iye kwa ine zambiri," akufotokoza Clark. "Zinasintha ubale wathu kwambiri." Ichi chinali chizolowezi chobwerezabwereza kuchokera kumadzimva osayenera pamene adakula kuti mosazindikira adakhala wamkulu.

Clark adadziphunzitsa kuyika pansi lupanga ndikuvula zida, ndikugawana njira yake yochitira izi mu Shift Stirrer Method, kuti aliyense adziyese yekha.

Zomwe Othandizira Amaganiza Zokhudza Shift Olimbikitsa Njira

Ponseponse, magazini ino ndi poyambira bwino pantchito yamaganizidwe, atero katswiri wama psychology a Jennifer Musselman, MA, L.M.F.T., woyambitsa The Musselman Institute for Leadership Insight & Marriage Therapy. Padziko lapansi la mankhwala, izi zili ngati kuphunzira ma ABC. "Ndi njira yabwino, yoyamba yodziwitsa anthu za chitukuko kapena chitukuko, makamaka kwa iwo omwe sanachite bwino kapena chithandizo chamankhwala," akutero.

Kawirikawiri, anthu ambiri ndi oipa kwambiri pozindikira ndikukonzekera malingaliro - makamaka osalimbikitsa, akutero Elizabeth Cohen, Ph.D., katswiri wazachipatala wodziwa bwino zamakhalidwe abwino. Njira yolembera, kusinkhasinkha, komanso kudzipeza yokha ndi yabwino nthawi ya COVID, makamaka masiku achisanu ozizira komanso ozizira pomwe anthu ambiri amakhala osungulumwa, osungulumwa, komanso okhumudwa, akuwonjezera.

Cohen akuti Shift Stirrer Method imamukumbutsa za "pulogalamu yochira ya AA," chifukwa "mumalemba zomwe mwachita tsiku ndi tsiku, komanso momwe mungasinthire," akufotokoza. "Mukuyang'ana zomwe amachitcha kuti 'zolakwika' za munthu wanu - liwu loyipa - ndikuwonetsa. Kuwonetsera uku ndikwabwino kwambiri, ndipo kucheza ndi malingaliro omwe mukukumana nawo ndikwabwino kwambiri." Akunenanso kuti "chithandizo chovomerezeka ndi kudzipereka ndichithandizo chotsimikizira ndi nkhawa."

Izi zimapereka "njira yolandirira yothandiza anthu kuti azindikire mayendedwe amakono a mgwirizano (kapena CCRP)," atero katswiri wazamisala Forrest Talley, Ph.D., yemwe anayambitsa Attictus Psychological Services ku Folsom, CA. CCRP ndi lingaliro lomwe limagwiritsidwa ntchito posanthula ndikusanthula mayanjano abwenzi amunthu (monga Clark, izi ndi zomwe zimangokhala "kukopera ndi kumata," machitidwe). Talley ananenanso kuti anachita chidwi powerenga magazini ya Clark koyamba chifukwa "amayang'ana kwambiri kulingalira (posankha mkangano ndikuwulola kuti udutse m'malingaliro ngati kuti ndi kanema), kuphatikiza njira zomveka zowunikira."

"Zonsezi zimandigwira ngati malangizo abwino kwambiri," akutero Talley. "Kuphatikiza apo, zolembedwazo ndi zomveka bwino komanso mwachidule ndipo masambawa amapereka malingaliro opatsa chidwi."

Ngakhale madokotala onse atatu akuvomereza lingaliro la buku la SSM ngati gawo loyamba, onse amavomereza kuti muyenera kusamala ngati mwakumana ndi zoopsa. "Pali T wamkulu ndi T wamng'ono," akufotokoza Musselman. "Big T ili ngati kugwiririra, nkhondo, ndi zina zotero. Bukuli lingachititsenso munthu wina yemwe ali ndi Big T. Limaimbanso mlandu owerenga, ngati zikhulupiriro zawo, malingaliro, kenako zikhulupiriro zake ndizabodza. Izi ndizowononga kwambiri Little 't' [monga mavuto azachuma kapena azamalamulo, chisudzulo kapena kutha koopsa, ndi zina zambiri] atha kuwululidwa m'buku lino, ndipo nzabwino. Koma ndiye, mumatani nazo? "

A Cohen amatchulanso chimodzimodzi kuti "ngati othandizira omwe amagwira ntchito zoopsa, timalola anthu kuti azichita zomwe sizikugwira ntchito ndi zomwe akufuna kukonza, koma timawakhazika pansi pazomwe akuchita bwino," akufotokoza. "Mwanjira imeneyi, izi sizimangika mokwanira, ndipo [kwa iwo omwe adakumana ndi zowawa], ndingalimbikitse kusinkhasinkha komwe mwadutsa."

Mwanjira imeneyi, a Dr. Talley amakhulupirira kuti iyi ikhoza kukhala buku lothandizirana nalo kuzidziwitso zina - monga kudzera mu chithandizo chenicheni, kapena pulogalamu yowonjezera.

Ngati muli ndi chidziwitso chokhudza chithandizo, makamaka chidziwitso cha khalidwe, Musselman akuti izi zidzamveka bwino kwambiri. Ngati simunatero, "aliyense akuyenera kuyamba kwinakwake," akufotokoza, ndikuwona kuti ndikofunikira kunena kuti izi sizoyenera kulandira mankhwala.

Momwe magazini amapangira, iyi ndi yamphamvu kwambiri. Mphamvu, kulingalira, ndi chikondi zomwe Clark amapangira zimapanga njira yokongola kwambiri (ngakhale yolimba!), Ndipo mukaphatikiza ndi chithandizo chamankhwala kapena chitsogozo chachipatala, izi zitha kukhala zosintha mwamalingaliro anu.

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