Zomwe Muyenera Kusinkhasinkha Pasanafike Tsiku Lililonse Loyamba

Zamkati

• 1. Idzakhazika onse ~ misempha ~.
• 2. Mukhazikika pano komanso pano.
• 3. Ikutsegula malingaliro anu ndi mtima.
• 4. Mudzalumikizana kwambiri ndi zomwe mukufuna komanso zomwe mukufuna.
• 5. Idzakusangalatsaninso tsiku lanu.
• Onaninso za

Manja otuluka thukuta, manja akunjenjemera, mtima ukuthamanga, m'mimba mwa mfundo - ayi, iyi sipakatikati pa masewera olimbitsa thupi a HIIT. Ndi mphindi zisanu pamaso tsiku loyamba, ndipo inu mwina mantha AF. Pali china chake chokhudza tsiku loyamba (makamaka tsiku losawona kapena tsiku la intaneti, komwe mumakumana ndi IRL kwa nthawi yoyamba nthawi zonse) yomwe imatha kukutumizani mu tizzy yathunthu. Kutenga chovala chowonjezera chidaliro ndikuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi kumatha kusefukira thupi lanu ndi "Ndili ndi izi" kumva komanso kumva bwino ma endorphin, koma izi siziyenera kukhala zokhazo zomwe muyenera kuchita patsamba lanu loyamba lokonzekera kukonzekera.

Zikuoneka kuti, kusinkhasinkha kungakhale chinthu choyamba chomwe malingaliro anu ndi thupi lanu zimafunikira kuti mukhale ndi roulette yomwe ndi dziko lamakono lazibwenzi: eharmony yangogwirizana ndi pulogalamu yosinkhasinkha Imani, Pumani & Ganizirani kuti mufufuze ogwiritsa ntchito awo komanso anapeza kuti kusinkhasinkha kuli ndi ubwino pa moyo wanu wa chibwenzi.

Anayerekeza mamembala a eharmony 311 adagwiritsanso ntchito Imani, Pumirani & Ganizirani ndi gulu lina la mamembala a 311 omwe sanagwiritse ntchito pulogalamu yosinkhasinkha (koma anali amsinkhu wofanana, jenda, malo ndipo adalembetsa ku eharmony nthawi yomweyo). Adapeza kuti ogwiritsa ntchito osinkhasinkha amalowa mu pulogalamu ya zibwenzi 81% nthawi zambiri, amasakatula 92% ya mbiri yamasewera awo kuposa omwe sanatengereko, ndipo amawonedwa ndi machesi awo 53 peresenti nthawi zambiri. Ndipo woponya: Ogwiritsa ntchito Stop, Breath & Think anali ndi machesi 85% pamasewera olumikizana ndi ma boos awo omwe angathe (werengani: amatumizirana mameseji).

Koma osangotenga mawu a eharmony pa izo. Apa, zifukwa zonse zomwe muyenera kupanga kusinkhasinkha chinthu chofunikira kwambiri pamndandanda wanu wam'mbuyomu (CHABWINO, icho, ndikuthamangira Beyonce).

1. Idzakhazika onse ~ misempha ~.

Nthawi yaying'ono ya zen ikhoza kukhala ngati mapiritsi odekha asanakwane momwe angatonthozerere musanagone kapena panthawi yopumira, kapena kuthandizira kuthetsa nkhawa zonse.

"Pasanafike tsiku loyamba, malingaliro anu angayambe kuthamanga," akutero Amy Baglan, woyambitsa MeetMindful, pulogalamu ya chibwenzi yomwe imagwirizanitsa anthu odzipereka kuti azikhala moganizira. "Izi zomwe zimasokoneza malingaliro ndi zomwe Abuda amatcha 'monkey mind.'" Yesani kukhala pansi ndikusinkhasinkha kwa mphindi 10. "Zingathe kuchita zodabwitsa kukhazika mtima pansi mphamvu zosakhazikikazo ndikubwezeretsani kuti mukhale bwino kuti muwoneke ngati ndinu weniweni, wodabwitsa," akutero.

Mitsempha yofatsa (mukudziwa, ~ butterflies ~) iyenera kuyembekezeredwa. (Kudabwitsidwa - nawonso ndiabwino kwa inu!). Komabe, kuda nkhawa kwambiri ndi momwe zinthu zilili kungathe kuwononga tsikulo: "Madeti oyamba amakhala ovuta kwambiri ngati munthu amakhala ndi nkhawa zambiri," akutero Jill P. Weber, Ph.D., katswiri wazamisala yemwe ali ndi chilolezo komanso katswiri wa Mindsail, foni yamakono. pulogalamu yosinkhasinkha."Kuganizira mopitirira muyeso ndikuchita mopitirira muyeso ndikupha libido ndipo kumakutengerani kutali kuti musadziwonetsere zenizeni za inu." Kotero ngati ndinu openga nkhawa, deti mwina adzaipiraipira, ndipo inu muyamba freaking kwambiri-kutumiza inu mu mantha kutsika mozungulira.

Ngati mukuda nkhawa kuti tsikuli lidzafanana Madeti ochokera ku Gahena, kugwiritsa ntchito zowonera panthawi yosinkhasinkha kungathandize, atero Sanam Hafeez, Ph.D., katswiri wazamisala wazachipatala komanso membala waukadaulo ku Teachers College, Columbia University. "Ndi njira yabwino kusewera momwe mukufuna tsikulo lisanachitike." Ndi zophweka: Ingotsekani maso anu kwa mphindi 10 mpaka 15, pumani, ndipo yerekezerani kuti mwakumana ndi munthu wamkulu, mukukhala ndi makambitsirano osangalatsa, ndi kumva bwino.

2. Mukhazikika pano komanso pano.

"Kusinkhasinkha kumathandizira kukhazikika pakadali pano," akutero Hafeez. Kutenga mphindi zochepa kusinkhasinkha kudzakutumizirani ku tsikulo ndi malingaliro opanda chisokonezo (monga zotsalira za tsiku lotopetsa la ntchito) ndi kusunga maganizo anu pa munthu ndi kukambirana pamaso panu (osati pa wakale wanu, kapena tsiku lowopsya munali ndi sabata yatha). Zithandizira nkhawa za m'mene mukumana ndi tsiku lanu komanso ngati mudzalumikizane kapena ayi, akutero Weber, kuti mutha kusangalala ndi nthawiyo pomwe zimachitika ~ mwachilengedwe ~.

BTW, mukamasinkhasinkha, cholinga sichiyenera Imani kuganiza. "Cholinga ndikuti mupange danga m'moyo wanu kuti muzitha kulumikizana ndi inu mwanjira ina yomwe imakhudza kulingalira pang'ono ndikudziwitsidwa za zomwe mumakumana nazo mkati," akutero a Weber. "Osadzidzudzula nthawi zonse malingaliro ako atakufikitsani munjira ina kapena mukasokonezedwa ... koma dziwani komwe malingaliro anu akupititsani." (Nawa maupangiri onse omwe mungafune osinkhasinkha.)

3. Ikutsegula malingaliro anu ndi mtima.

Kusinkhasinkha sikungokuthandizani kuti musakuwonetseni mpaka tsikulo losasunthika, koma kumakonzekeretsa malingaliro anu ndi mtima wanu kuti mutha kulumikizana ndi munthu wina. (Ndikulingalira chiyani? Palinso zosinkhasinkha makamaka zokuthandizani kutsegula mtima wanu.)

Kukhala okumbukira kumakupangitsani kuti muzindikire momwe mukumvera komanso momwe mukumvera. Ngati mukumva bwino, mudzakopeka ndi zinthu zabwino m'moyo wanu-ndipo zimaphatikizaponso anthu, atero a Hafeez. Mwina mumadziwa kale kuti karma imabwereranso, koma positivity imateronso. "Kukumbukira malingaliro athu kumatipatsa mwayi woti tisamangokhalira kuganizira zinthu zoipa, zopanda chiyembekezo, zodetsa nkhawa kupita kuzabwino, zomwe zingatipangitse kukhala ndi nkhawa kapena kukhumudwa ndikukhala ndi chiyembekezo komanso achangu," akutero.

Ndipo izi zimapitirira kuposa tsiku loyamba: Kulimbikitsa kulingalira kumalimbikitsa kuti mumvetsetse bwino ndikuchita zinthu zomwe poyamba zinkawoneka ngati zotchinga pamsewu-kapena zoipitsitsa, mapeto a imfa, akutero Baglan. "Kulingalira kungathandize kuthana ndi nkhani zodalirika, kuthetsa mavuto pamene akuwuka, kukulitsa ubwenzi, ndi kuswa makhalidwe akale. Sizichitika mwadzidzidzi, koma ndi ntchito ndi kukhalapo mukhoza kukhala ndi kusintha kwakukulu mu moyo wanu wa chibwenzi."

4. Mudzalumikizana kwambiri ndi zomwe mukufuna komanso zomwe mukufuna.

Kukhala wosamala kwambiri kapena kudzidalira kumatha kukuthandizani kuti musamadziganizire koyambirira-zomwe zikutanthauza kuti ndizosavuta kuwonetsa mpaka tsiku lomwe likubwezeretsani zenizeni, atero a Weber. Zimakuthandizani kuti muzindikire yemwe muli mkati mwake-ndipo amene mukuwafuna kunjako.

Kusamala kungakuthandizeni kudziwa mtundu wa munthu yemwe mukufuna kukopa, akutero Hafeez. "Mukamatha kuyang'ana kwambiri pazomwe inu ndikufuna m'malo mwa zomwe inu sindikufuna, zomwe inu ndikufuna imalowa m'moyo mwanu, "akutero." Malingaliro athu amapanga zenizeni zathu. "(Chifukwa china chokha choti kudzilankhulira kwabwino ndichamfumu.)

Kulumikizana ndi zomwe mukufuna kungakuthandizeni kuwona kudzera m'malo ogulitsira (kapena anayi) ndikusankha moona mtima ngati munthuyu ndi woyenera tsiku lachiwiri.

5. Idzakusangalatsaninso tsiku lanu.

Telefoni imatha kupita mbali zonse ziwiri, koma zimangotengera munthu m'modzi woganizira kuti asunthire bwino. "Ngati munthu amene amasinkhasinkha akumva momveka bwino komanso momasuka polumikizana, mphamvuzo zimatha kukhudza munthu winayo, kuwapangitsa kukhala omasuka," akutero Hafeez. Mfungulo: Khalani ndi chiyembekezo chabwino kuti mudzayamikire tsikulo, poyerekeza kuthera nthawi yonseyi mukuyang'ana zifukwa zomwe simukufanizira, akutero.

Ndipo, monga mungaganizire, ngati onse anthu amakhala ndi malingaliro odabwitsayi, ziphuphu zimatsimikizika kuti ziziwuluka: "Tawona kuti maanja omwe onse ali ndi chizolowezi chosinkhasinkha amakhala olumikizana bwino wina ndi mnzake," akutero Baglan. "Kumapeto kwa tsikuli, kusinkhasinkha sikutanthauza kukhala chipolopolo chasiliva chothanirana ndi mavuto azibwenzi, koma zitha kukuthandizani kuti mukhale okonzekera zokumana nazo zakuya, komanso zosangalatsa."

Yakwana nthawi yosambira pa Tinder, onjezani "wokonda kusinkhasinkha" ku Bumble bio yanu, kapena kudumphani pa MeetMindful. Kalonga wanu kapena Mfumukazi-ndi mnzako wosinkhasinkha-atha kumangosambira (ndikusinkhasinkha) kwa inunso.

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