Khalani Womvera Wachifundo mu Masitepe 10

Zamkati

• 1. Konzani thupi lanu
• 2. Chotsani zododometsa
• 3. Mvetserani popanda kuweruza
• 4. Osapanga za iwe
• 5. Khalani nawo
• 6. Samalani ndi zomwe sizikutanthauza
• 7. Pewani kupereka mayankho
• 8. Musachepetse nkhawa zawo
• 9. Ganizirani za momwe akumvera
• 10. Osadandaula kuti zikalakwitsa

Kumvetsera mwachidwi, komwe nthawi zina kumatchedwa kumvetsera mwachidwi kapena kumvetsera mwachidwi, kumachita zoposa kungomvera. Ndizopangitsa kuti wina azimva kutsimikizika ndikuwonedwa.

Mukamaliza moyenera, kumvetsera mwachidwi kumatha kukulitsa kulumikizana kwanu ndikupatsa ena lingaliro lakukhala nawo akamayankhula nanu. Ngakhale bwino? Ndi chinthu chosavuta kuphunzira ndikuchigwiritsa ntchito.

1. Konzani thupi lanu

Gawo loyamba lowonetsa munthu yemwe amamuganizira ndi kuwayang'ana ndikumayang'ana momasuka.

Nthawi zambiri, pamene wina akuyankhula nafe, tikhoza kuchoka kwa iwo mosazindikira ndikuyesa mndandanda wazogulitsa kapena kuganizira malo omwe tikufuna kukadya. Koma kumvera kwachikondi kumakhudza thupi lonse.

Ingoganizirani mnzanu wapamtima akuwonetsa tsiku lanu lamasana akulira. Kodi mungamufunse mwamwayi za vuto lanu? Mwayi wake, mungatembenuke nthawi yomweyo kukakumana naye. Yesetsani kuchita chimodzimodzi pokambirana kulikonse.

2. Chotsani zododometsa

Nthawi zambiri timakhala ogwidwa ndi mafoni athu omwe sitimazindikira pomwe wina patsogolo pathu akuyesera kulumikizana bwino.

M'malo moyankha mameseji ndikungogwedeza mutu limodzi ndi zomwe mnzanu akunena, ikani zida zonse kutali ndikuwapempha kuti nawonso atero. Mwa kuchotsa zododometsa, mutha kuyang'ana pa anzanu ndikukhalapo kwambiri.

3. Mvetserani popanda kuweruza

Ndizovuta kuti anthu azilumikizana moona akamva kuweruzidwa. Kuti mupewe izi, samalani powamvera ndikupewa kuyankha motsutsana kapena kutsutsa ngakhale simukugwirizana ndi zomwe akunena.

Nenani kuti mnzanu akukuululirani zakuti ali ndi mavuto pachibwenzi chawo. M'malo mongodumphadumpha ndi zomwe mukuganiza kuti akuchita molakwika pachibwenzi, pitani kukachita kena kake, "Pepani kumva izi, mukuyenera kuti mwapanikizika kwambiri pakadali pano."

Izi sizikutanthauza kuti simungapereke malingaliro, makamaka akawapempha. Osangochita pamene mukusewera ngati womvera.

4. Osapanga za iwe

Yesetsani kukana kunena malingaliro anu pomwe akugawana nanu zina zofunika.

Ngati wina wataya wachibale, mwachitsanzo, musamuyankhe mwa kutchula zomwe mwataya. M'malo mwake, asonyezeni kuti mumawakonda powafunsa funso lotsatila za zomwe akumana nazo kapena mungowathandiza.

Nawa mayankho aulemu omwe mungayesere:

• “Pepani kwambiri ndi kutayika kwanu. Ndikudziwa momwe mumawakondera. ”
• “Ndiuze zambiri za mayi ako.”
• "Sindingathe kumvetsetsa momwe mukumvera, koma ndabwera pano mukandifuna."

5. Khalani nawo

Pamene munthu wina akulankhula, pewani kuganizira zomwe mudzanene kenako kapena kumusokoneza. Pepetsani zinthu ndikudikirira kuyankhulana musanalowe.

Yesetsani kuyang'anitsitsa ndikujambula zomwe akunena kuti zikuthandizeni kukhala tcheru m'ma konsu aatali.

6. Samalani ndi zomwe sizikutanthauza

Osangomvera ndi makutu.

Mutha kudziwa ngati munthu akumva kusangalala, kukwiya, kapena kuthedwa nzeru pozindikira kalankhulidwe kake ndi kamvekedwe ka mawu. Tawonani mawu omwe ali pafupi ndi maso awo, pakamwa ndi momwe akhala.

Ngati mapewa a mnzanu atagwa pomwe akukufotokozerani za tsiku lawo, mwachitsanzo, angafunikire thandizo lina.

7. Pewani kupereka mayankho

Chifukwa chakuti wina amagawana mavuto awo, sizitanthauza kuti akufuna upangiri kuti nawonso abwerenso. Kumbukirani kuti anthu ambiri akufuna kutsimikizika ndi kuthandizidwa ndipo mwina sangakhale ndi chidwi kumva mayankho omwe muyenera kupereka (ngakhale atakhala ndi zolinga zabwino).

Ngati mnzanu wataya ntchito ndipo akufuna kutulutsa, mwachitsanzo, pewani nthawi yomweyo kunena malo omwe angatumizenso kuyambiranso (mutha kupereka izi mtsogolo ngati awonetsa chidwi). M'malo mwake, aloleni kuti aziyang'anira zokambiranazo ndikungopereka zolowa zanu mukafunsidwa.

8. Musachepetse nkhawa zawo

Kumvetsera modekha kumatanthauza kukhala ozindikira mukamacheza momasuka komanso osakana zodandaula za munthu wina kapena zodandaula.

Ngakhale nkhani zawo zikuwoneka zazing'ono kwa inu, kungovomereza momwe akumvera kungawapangitse kumva kuti akumvedwa ndikutsimikizika.

9. Ganizirani za momwe akumvera

Mukamamvera, ndikofunikira kuwonetsa kuti mwamvetsetsa zomwe mnzake akufuna kukuwuzani. Izi zikutanthauza kugwedeza mutu ndikupereka mayankho pokumbukira zambiri ndikubwereza mfundo zazikuluzikulu.

Kuti muwonetse umboni kuti mukumvetsera, yesani mawu otsatirawa:

• “Mukusangalala kwambiri!”
• "Izi zikuwoneka ngati zovuta kukhala nazo."
• Ndikumva kuti mukumva kuwawa. ”

10. Osadandaula kuti zikalakwitsa

Palibe amene ali wangwiro. Mutha kukhala ndi nthawi yolankhulana yomwe simukudziwa choti muchite kapena kunena. Ndipo nthawi zina, mutha kunena zosayenera. Aliyense amachita nthawi ina.

M'malo modandaula kuti mukumvetsera kapena kuyankha bwino kapena ayi, onetsetsani kuti mukukhalapo. Nthawi zambiri, anthu amangofuna kuti amveke ndi kumvedwa.

Cindy Lamothe ndi mtolankhani wodziyimira pawokha wokhala ku Guatemala. Amalemba zambiri zamalumikizidwe pakati pa thanzi, ukhondo, ndi sayansi yamakhalidwe amunthu. Adalembedwera The Atlantic, New York Magazine, Teen Vogue, Quartz, The Washington Post, ndi ena ambiri. Pezani iye pa cindylamothe.com.