Momwe Tatoo Inandithandizira Kugonjetsa Moyo Wosadzikayikira Wokhudzana ndi Kupunduka Kwanga

Zamkati

• Ndipo iyi sinali tattoo yakale yakale - inali yokongola, yopanga nyenyezi kumanja kwanga kumanzere
• Kenako ndidazindikira zakujambula mphini monga munthu woyamba kumene ku koleji

Thanzi ndi thanzi zimakhudza aliyense wa ife mosiyanasiyana. Iyi ndi nkhani ya munthu m'modzi.

Nditakhala pansi ndikulemba tattoo kumanja kwanga kwamanzere mu 2016, ndimadziona ngati munthu wodziwika bwino. Ngakhale kuti ndinali wamanyazi wazaka 20 zokha, ndinali nditagwiritsa ntchito nthawi, mphamvu, ndi ndalama zonse zomwe ndinkapeza ndikamakulitsa zolembalemba. Ndinkakonda mbali iliyonse yazolemba, kotero kuti ndili ndi zaka 19, monga wophunzira waku koleji yemwe amakhala kumidzi ya New York, ndidaganiza zolembalemba kumbuyo kwanga.

Ngakhale pakadali pano, munthawi yomwe anthu otchuka amavala ma tattoo awo owonekera ndi kunyada, ojambula ambiri amatchulabe izi ngati "choyimitsa ntchito" chifukwa ndizovuta kubisala. Ndinadziwa izi kuyambira pomwe ndidafika kwa wojambulayo, Zach, kuti andisankhe.

Ndipo ngakhale Zach iyemwini adafotokoza zakunyinyirika polemba tattoo yamayi wachichepere, ndidatsimikiza kuti: Mkhalidwe wanga udali wapadera, ndidalimbikira. Ndidachita kafukufuku wanga. Ndinadziwa kuti nditha kupeza ntchito ina munkhani zofalitsa. Kuphatikiza apo, ndinali kale ndi kuyamba kwamanja awiri athunthu.

Ndipo iyi sinali tattoo yakale yakale - inali yokongola, yopanga nyenyezi kumanja kwanga kumanzere

Dzanja langa "laling'ono".

Ndinabadwa ndi ectrodactyly, chibadwa chobadwa nacho chomwe chimakhudza dzanja langa lamanzere. Izi zikutanthauza kuti ndinabadwa ndi zala zosakwana 10 padzanja limodzi. Matendawa ndi osowa ndipo akuti amakhudza ana obadwa.

Mawonekedwe ake amasiyanasiyana malinga ndi milandu. Nthawi zina zimakhala zogwirizana, kutanthauza kuti zimakhudza mbali zonse ziwiri za thupi, kapena gawo la matenda oopsa kwambiri komanso oopsa. Kwa ine, ndili ndi manambala awiri kudzanja langa lamanzere, lomwe limaoneka ngati chala cha nkhanu. (Fuulani kwa Evan Peters 'wa "Lobster Boy" mu "American Horror Story: Freak Show" koyamba komanso nthawi yokha yomwe ndidawonapo zikhalidwe zanga zikuyimiridwa munyuzipepala zodziwika bwino.)

Mosiyana ndi Lobster Boy, ndakhala ndi moyo wapamwamba komanso wosakhazikika. Makolo anga adandiyambitsa chidaliro kuyambira ndili mwana, ndipo ntchito zazing'ono - kusewera pamabala anyani kusukulu ya pulaimale, kuphunzira kutayipa mukalasi yamakompyuta, kutumizira mpira panthawi yophunzirira tenisi - zinali zovuta chifukwa cha kupunduka kwanga, sindinkalola kukhumudwa kwanga mundiletse.

Anzanga akusukulu komanso aphunzitsi adandiuza kuti "ndine wolimba mtima," "wolimbikitsa." Kunena zowona, ndimangopulumuka, ndikuphunzira kusinthasintha ndi dziko lomwe kulumala komanso kupezeka mosavuta nthawi zambiri kumachitika pambuyo pake. Sindinakhalepo ndi chisankho.

Tsoka ilo kwa ine, sizovuta zonse zomwe zimakhala zachabechabe kapena zotheka mosavuta monga nthawi yosewerera kapena luso lapakompyuta.

Pofika nthawi yomwe ndimaphunzira ku sekondale, "dzanja langa laling'ono," monga momwe banja langa tidatchulira, lidakhala manyazi akulu. Ndinali mtsikana wachichepere yemwe ndimakulira kudera lotanganidwa ndi mawonekedwe, ndipo dzanja langa laling'ono linali chinthu china "chachilendo" chokhudza ine chomwe sindingathe kusintha.

Manyazi adakula nditalemera komanso pomwe ndidazindikira kuti sindinali wowongoka. Ndimamva ngati kuti thupi langa landipereka mobwerezabwereza. Monga kuti kuwoneka wolumala sikokwanira, ndinali tsopano wonenepa wopanda aliyense amene amafuna kukhala bwenzi. Chifukwa chake, ndidadzipereka kuti ndikhale wosafunika.

Nthawi zonse ndikakumana ndi munthu watsopano, ndimabisa dzanja langa laling'ono mthumba la thalauza langa kapena jekete langa poyesera kuti "zodabwitsazi" zisaoneke. Izi zidachitika pafupipafupi kotero kuti kuzibisa kunakhala chikhumbo chosazindikira, chimodzi chomwe sindinadziwe kotero kuti mnzanga akandiuza mokoma, ndinadabwa.

Kenako ndidazindikira zakujambula mphini monga munthu woyamba kumene ku koleji

Ndinayamba zing'onozing'ono - ndodo 'n' zikoka kuchokera kwa bwenzi lakale, ma tatoo ang'onoang'ono pa mkono wanga - ndipo posakhalitsa ndidadzipeza ndekha ndikulakalaka zaluso.

Panthawiyo, sindinathe kufotokoza kukoka komwe ndimamva, momwe malo ojambulira tattoo m'tawuni yanga yaku koleji adandikoka ngati njenjete yamoto. Tsopano, ndazindikira kuti ndimadzimva kukhala woyenera kutengera mawonekedwe anga koyamba muunyamata wanga.

Nditakhala pampando wachikopa mu studio ya Zach yachinsinsi, ndikudzilimbitsa m'maganizo ndi mthupi chifukwa cha ululu womwe ndimafuna kupirira, manja anga adayamba kunjenjemera mosaletseka. Iyi sinali tattoo yanga yoyamba, koma kukula kwa chidutswachi, komanso tanthauzo la kusungidwa kosawoneka bwino komanso kowoneka bwino, zidandigunda nthawi yomweyo.

Mwamwayi, sindinagwedezeke kwa nthawi yayitali. Zach adasewera nyimbo zosinkhasinkha mu studio yake, ndipo pakati pa magawidwe ndikucheza naye, mantha anga adachepa mwachangu. Ndidaluma pakamwa panga nthawi zovutazo ndikupumira modekha panthawi yopepuka.

Gawo lonse lidatenga pafupifupi maola awiri kapena atatu. Titamaliza, adakulunga dzanja langa lonse mu Saran Wrap, ndipo ndidaliyikweza ngati mphotho, ndikumva khutu mpaka khutu.

Izi zikuchokera kwa msungwana yemwe adakhala zaka zambiri akubisa dzanja lake kuti asawonekere.

Dzanja langa lonse linali lofiyira komanso lofewa, koma ndinatuluka pamwambo womwewo ndikumverera kopepuka, womasuka, komanso wolamulira kuposa kale lonse.

Ndidakongoletsa dzanja langa lamanzere - anayi amoyo wanga malinga ndikadakumbukira - ndichinthu chokongola, china chomwe ndidasankha. Ndidatembenuza china chake chomwe ndimafuna kubisa kukhala gawo lathupi lomwe ndimakonda kugawana.

Mpaka pano, ndimavala maluso awa monyadira. Ndimadzipeza ndekha ndikutulutsa dzanja langa laling'ono mthumba mwanga. Gahena, nthawi zina ndimaziwonetsa pazithunzi pa Instagram. Ndipo ngati sizikulankhula ndi mphamvu ya ma tattoo kuti isinthe, ndiye kuti sindikudziwa chomwe chimachita.

Sam Manzella ndi wolemba komanso mkonzi waku Brooklyn yemwe amafotokoza zaumoyo, zaluso ndi chikhalidwe, komanso nkhani za LGBTQ. Zolemba zake zawonekera m'mabuku monga Vice, Yahoo Lifestyle, Logo's NewNowNext, The Riveter, ndi zina zambiri. Tsatirani iye pa Twitter ndi Instagram.