Anzanu Awiriwa Amati Amatha: Tsopano Chani?

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Chaka chatha, gulu la abwenzi la Abbe Wright limawoneka ngati langwiro. Mnyamata wazaka 28 waku Brooklyn adacheza kwambiri ndi abwenzi ake awiri apasukulu yasekondale, Sarah ndi Brittany, ndi zibwenzi zawo, Peter ndi Patrick, motsatana - zinali zabwino pang'ono. Koma kumapeto kwa chaka, Brittany ndi Patrick anasiyana-ndipo chiwonongeko chachikulu chinabuka.

"Zinali zoyipa," akukumbukira Abbe, yemwe akufotokoza kuti kutha kwaukwati kudachitika magawo awiri. "Brittany ankayembekezera kuti Sarah ndi ine tidzakhala ndi kachidindo ka atsikana ndipo osamuwona Patrick, konse. Koma ife tiri oyandikana kwambiri ndi Patrick, mwachiwonekere, kotero tinamva kuti tatsekeredwa. Kenaka Brittany anayamba kupempha kuti tizidziwitso tating'ono ta moyo wake wachikondi tisinthidwe. Zinakhala kuti, 'Musamuuze Patrick kuti ndine wosasoŵa kanthu.' Zonsezi zinali zotopetsa komanso zopanikiza, "akutero Abbe.

Akatswiri amanena kuti kulimbana ndi magulu a magulu pambuyo pa kugawanika kwa bwenzi ndi chikhalidwe cha anthu chomwe chikuwonjezeka chifukwa cha chikhalidwe chamakono chogwirizanitsa. "Chomwe chikuchitika ndikuti anthu ambiri akucheza m'magulu akulu ndikucheza m'gululi chifukwa chibwenzi sichachilendo pano," akufotokoza Carlin Flora, katswiri wodziwa zaubwenzi komanso wolemba Ubwenzi: Njira Zodabwitsa Zomwe Amzathu Amatipangira Kukhala Ndife. Apa, zochitika zitatu zomwe zimafotokozedwa kwambiri pambuyo pocheza ndi anzawo-komanso momwe mungachitire ndi aliyense.

Chitsanzo # 1: Mumakakamizika Kutenga Mbali

Simuyenera kuchita nawo nkhondo yosunga ubwenzi kuti mukhale wothandizira onse awiri - zomwe muyenera kuchita ndikulumikizana. Chinsinsi chake ndi kukhala woona mtima ndi waulemu, ndi kusazemba mobisa. "Mwayi wake, mutha kukhala wokonda chipani china pang'ono kuposa china, ndipo zili bwino. Koma chilichonse chomwe mungachite, onetsetsani kuti mwalankhula china chake kwa anzanu onse monga, 'Ndikumvetsetsa kuti zingakhale zovuta kwa inu ngati Ndimachezabe ndi Mark mwa apo ndi apo. Koma ndilinso naye paubwenzi wabwino ndipo ndikufuna kuusunga—ndikukhulupirira kuti mukuzindikira kuti izi sizindichotsera thandizo langa kwa inu,” akulangiza motero Andrea Bonior, katswiri wa zamaganizo komanso wolemba buku. Kukonzekera Kwaubwenzi. Mnzanu atha kukhumudwa poyamba ("Sindikukhulupirira kuti akadangopachikika ndi wakale wanga!"), Koma pamapeto pake, malingaliro amenewo adayamba chifukwa chakusokonekera-ndipo mnzako azindikira kuti akangotuluka njira yopatsirana.

Chitsanzo # 2: Mukufuna Kuti Musapewe Kulephera

Kaŵirikaŵiri, panthaŵi ya chisudzulo, onse aŵiriwo amakambitsirana za mnzake. Zambiri. Ndipo izi zitha kupanga m'malo, um, malo otopa. M'malo mwake, vibe ya poizoni imatha kukhala yolimba kwambiri kotero kuti imatha kukupangitsani kufuna kuthamanga pansi pa phiri ndikubisala m'malo mothandizira masamba anu. Izi ndi zomwe zidachitikira Alison, wazaka 33 waku Manhattan. "Mumtima mwanga, ndimafuna kukhala nawo onse awiri, koma zinali zamphamvu kwambiri kotero kuti ndimangofuna kukhazikika osachita chilichonse," akuvomereza. Malangizo abwino kwambiri? Osapewa anzako - amakufunani kuposa kale. M’malo mwake, musaloŵerere m’malo mwa kungomuuza kuti mumvetsere. "Nenani," Ndabwera kudzakufunsani, ndipo ndikuwona kuti zimathandiza kutulutsa. Koma ndikuganiza kuti zitha kukhala zothandiza ndikangomvera, "a Bonior akulangiza. Mwayi wake, adzakhala osangalala kukugwiritsani ntchito ngati bolodi. Mwanjira iyi, simungawononge ubwenzi wanu ndi munthu aliyense - ndipo kudzakhala kosavuta kusunga maubwenzi onse awiri pakapita nthawi.

Chitsanzo # 3: Ubale Wanu Ndi Onse Omwe Akumva Kovuta

Anzanu awiri apamtima akasiyana, mudzakumana ndi zovuta zina, monga imelo ya gulu lonse. Zomwe zinali "zotumizira" mwachangu komanso zosavuta tsopano zasandulika: "Ndi ndani omwe ndalemba nawo pamndandandandawu?" Ngakhale mukudziwa kuti akumva kuwawa kwakukulu, ena mwa inu mungawakhumudwitse pothetsa nthawi ya onse, akutero Flora. Koma chifukwa zinthu sizikhala chimodzimodzi sizitanthauza kuti sizikhala zabwino. Kubetcherana kwanu kwabwino ndikupatsa nthawi; gwiritsitsani ntchito zamagulu mpaka atakhala ndi nthawi yochira ndikusankha momwe angachitire ndi kukhazikitsa kwatsopano. Bonior anafotokoza kuti: “Kukhazikitsa zinthu zatsopano sikungochitika mwadzidzidzi. Khalani oleza mtima, ndipo pakapita nthawi, mudzazindikira zomwe akufuna kwa inu. Pankhani ya Abbe, Brittany posachedwapa adayamba chibwenzi ndi mnyamata watsopano, ndipo wakhala akumubweretsa kumagulu-ngakhale ndi Patrick kumeneko. "Zachidziwikire kuti ndizovuta pang'ono, koma aliyense akuyesera kukhala okhwima. Ndine wokondwa kuti tonse titha kuchezeranso. Zinthu sizidzakhala monga momwe zidaliri, koma ndi moyo, ndipo tikupanga izi zatsopano ntchito yamphamvu, "akutero.

Maina a abwenzi a Abbe adasinthidwa pazifukwa zachinsinsi.

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