Ichi ndichifukwa chake ndidatsegulira zaumoyo wanga kuofesi

Zamkati

• Zomwe ndimabisala matenda anga amisala
• 1. Mmodzi mwa asanu
• 2. Matenda amisala ndimatenda enieni
• 3. Ndikufuna kuti zizikhala bwino tikamalankhula za matenda amisala kuntchito
• 4. Ndimathabe kugwira ntchito yanga
• 5. Matenda amisala andipangitsa kukhala wantchito mnzake

Ndinaganiza zogawana izi nthawi zikwi zingapo, pokambirana pamakina a khofi kapena pamisonkhano yovuta kwambiri. Ndadziyesa ndekha ndikuzifotokoza mu mphindi yakusowa, ndikufuna kwambiri kuti ndimve kuthandizidwa ndikumvetsetsa kuchokera kwa inu, ogwira nawo ntchito.

Koma ndinadziletsa, mobwerezabwereza. Ndinkaopa zomwe munganene, kapena osanena, kubwerera kwa ine. M'malo mwake, ndinayimeza ndikukakamiza kumwetulira.

“Ayi, ndili bwino. Ndangotopa lero. "

Koma nditadzuka m'mawa uno, kufunika kwanga kogawana kunali kwamphamvu kuposa mantha anga.

Monga momwe Madalyn Parker adawonetsera pomwe amagawana maimelo abwana ake akumutsimikizira kuti ali ndi ufulu woti atenge tchuthi chodwala pazifukwa zamatenda amisala, tikupita patsogolo kwambiri pokhala otakasuka kuntchito. Chifukwa chake, ofesi yokondedwa, ndikulemba kalatayi kuti ndikuuzeni kuti ndimakhala ndikugwira ntchito yamatenda amisala.

Ndisanakuuzeni zambiri, chonde imani kaye ndikuganiza za Amy omwe mumawadziwa: Amy yemwe adakhomera kuyankhulana kwake. Amy yemwe amasewera timu ndi malingaliro opanga, nthawi zonse amakhala wofunitsitsa kuchita zochulukirapo. Amy yemwe amatha kudzipangira yekha m'chipinda chogona. Awa ndi Amy omwe mumawadziwa. Iye ndi weniweni.

Yemwe simunamudziwe ndi Amy yemwe wakhala ndi nkhawa yayikulu, matenda amisala wamba, komanso kupsinjika kwamphamvu pambuyo pake (PTSD) kuyambira pomwe mudakumana naye. Simunadziwe kuti bambo anga ndinadzipha ndili ndi zaka 13 zokha.

Simunadziwe chifukwa sindinkafuna kuti muwone. Koma zinali pamenepo. Monga ndimabweretsa chakudya changa chamasana kuofesi tsiku lililonse, ndimabweretsanso chisoni changa komanso nkhawa yanga.

Koma zipsinjo zomwe ndimadzipatsa kuti ndibise zisonyezo zanga kuntchito zikundivuta. Nthawi yakwana yoti ndiyime ndikunena "Ndili bwino, ndangotopa" pomwe sindiri.

Zomwe ndimabisala matenda anga amisala

Mutha kudabwa kuti ndichifukwa chiyani ndidasankha kubisa matenda anga amisala. Ngakhale ndikudziwa kuti kukhumudwa ndi kuda nkhawa ndi matenda ovomerezeka, si onse omwe amatero. Kusalidwa motsutsana ndi mikhalidwe yamaganizidwe ndi yeniyeni, ndipo ndakumanapo nayo nthawi zambiri.

Ndauzidwa kuti kukhumudwa ndikungolira chidwi. Kuti anthu omwe ali ndi nkhawa amangofunika kukhazikika ndikuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi. Kumwa mankhwala ndikulephera. Ndafunsidwa chifukwa chomwe banja langa silinachite zambiri kupulumutsa abambo anga. Kuti kudzipha kwake kunali ngati mantha.

Chifukwa cha zomwe zidandichitikirazi, ndidachita mantha kulankhula zaumoyo wanga kuntchito. Monga inu, ndikufunika ntchitoyi. Ndili ndi ngongole zoti ndilipire komanso banja lomwe ndimayenera kuchirikiza. Sindinkafuna kusokoneza magwiridwe anga antchito kapena mbiri yanga yabwino polankhula za zisonyezo zanga.

Koma ndikukulemberani kalatayi chifukwa ndikufuna kuti mumvetse. Chifukwa, ngakhale pantchito, kugawana ndikofunikira kwa ine. Ndikufuna kukhala woona komanso kuti mukhale owona ndi ine. Timakhala limodzi maola osachepera asanu ndi atatu patsiku. Kuchita chonamizira nthawi yonseyo yomwe sindimamva chisoni, kuda nkhawa, kukhumudwa, kapena kuchita mantha sindili bwino. Zodandaula zanga paumoyo wanga ziyenera kukhala zazikulu kuposa nkhawa zanga za wina aliyense.

Izi ndi zomwe ndikufuna kuchokera kwa inu: kumvetsera, kuphunzira, ndi kupereka chithandizo chanu m'njira iliyonse yomwe ingakhale yabwino kwa inu. Ngati simukudziwa chomwe munganene, simuyenera kunena chilichonse. Ingondichitanireni ndi kukoma mtima komanso ukadaulo womwe ndikuwonetsani.

Sindikufuna ofesi yathu kuti ikhale yotakasuka kwa onse. Zowonadi, izi ndizochepera pamalingaliro kuposa momwe zimakhalira pakumvetsetsa matenda amisala komanso momwe zizindikilo zimandikhudzira ndili pantchito.

Chifukwa chake, mu mzimu wakundimvetsetsa ndi zisonyezo zanga, Nazi zinthu zingapo zomwe ndikufuna kuti mudziwe.

1. Mmodzi mwa asanu

Mwayi wake ndikuti m'modzi mwa anthu asanu aliwonse omwe awerenga kalatayo adadwalapo matenda amisala mwanjira ina, kapena amakonda wina yemwe adakhalapo. Mwina simukudziwa, koma anthu ambiri azaka zonse, amuna ndi akazi, komanso mafuko amakumana ndi zovuta zamatenda amisala. Anthu omwe ali ndi matenda amisala sianthu amisala kapena amisili. Ndi anthu wamba ngati ine ndipo mwina ngati inu.

2. Matenda amisala ndimatenda enieni

Sali zilema zamakhalidwe ndipo siali vuto la aliyense. Pomwe zizindikilo zina zamatenda amisala ndizotengeka - monga kusowa chiyembekezo, chisoni, kapena kukwiya - zina zimakhala zakuthupi, monga kugunda kwamtima, thukuta, kapena mutu. Sindinasankhe kukhumudwa monganso momwe munthu wina angasankhire matenda ashuga. Zonsezi ndizachipatala zomwe zimafunikira chithandizo.

3. Ndikufuna kuti zizikhala bwino tikamalankhula za matenda amisala kuntchito

Sindikukufunsani kuti mudzakhale wothandizira wanga kapena phewa langa lenileni kulira. Ndili kale ndi njira yabwino yothandizira. Ndipo sindikusowa kuyankhula za matenda amisala tsiku lonse, tsiku lililonse. Zomwe ndikukufunsani ndikuti nthawi zina mundifunse zaumoyo wanga komanso kuti mutenge mphindi zochepa kuti mumvetsere.

Mwina titha kutenga khofi kapena nkhomaliro, kuti tingotuluka muofesi kwakanthawi. Zimathandiza nthawi zonse ena akagawana zomwe adakumana nazo ndi matenda amisala, kaya za iwo kapena anzawo kapena abale awo. Kumva nkhani yanu kumandipangitsa kumva kuti ndili ndekhandekha.

4. Ndimathabe kugwira ntchito yanga

Ndakhala ndikugwira ntchito kwa zaka 13. Ndipo ndakhala ndikukhumudwa, kuda nkhawa, komanso PTSD kwa onse. Nthawi zisanu ndi zinayi mwa khumi, ndimagwira magawo anga kunja kwa paki. Ngati ndiyamba kudzimva kukhala wopanda nkhawa, kuda nkhawa, kapena kukhumudwa, ndibwera kwa inu ndi mapulani kapena kupempha thandizo lina. Nthawi zina, ndimatha kutenga tchuthi chodwala - chifukwa ndimakhala ndi matenda.

5. Matenda amisala andipangitsa kukhala wantchito mnzake

Ndine wachifundo kwambiri, onse ndi ine ndekha ndi aliyense wa inu. Ndimadzilemekeza ndekha komanso anthu ena. Ndapulumuka zokumana nazo zovuta, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti ndimakhulupirira kuthekera kwanga. Nditha kudziyankha ndekha ndikupempha thandizo ndikadzafuna.

Sindiopa kugwira ntchito molimbika. Ndikaganiza zina mwa malingaliro olakwika omwe amagwiritsidwa ntchito kwa anthu omwe ali ndi matenda amisala - aulesi, openga, osakhazikika, osadalirika - ndimayankha momwe zomwe ndakumana nazo ndi matenda amisala zandipangitsa kukhala wosiyana ndi mikhalidwe imeneyi.

Ngakhale matenda amisala ali ndi zovuta zambiri, ndimasankha kuyang'ana zabwino zomwe zingabweretse osati moyo wanga wokha, komanso moyo wanga wantchito. Ndikudziwa kuti ndili ndi udindo wosamalira ndekha kunyumba komanso kuntchito. Ndipo ndikudziwa kuti pali mzere pakati pa moyo wathu wamunthu komanso waluso.

Zomwe ndikufunsani kwa inu ndi malingaliro otseguka, kulolerana, ndi kuthandizira ngati ndi pomwe ndagunda zovuta. Chifukwa ndikupatsani izi. Ndife gulu, ndipo tili mgulu limodzi.

Amy Marlow ali ndi nkhawa komanso matenda amisala. Iye ndi mlembi wa Buluu Woyera Buluu, yemwe adatchedwa mmodzi wa athu Mabulogu Abwino Kwambiri. Tsatirani iye pa Twitter pa @chantika_cendana_poet.] / p>